My Sweet Princess Theresa Options

[Tom's Dad]

Dear LS friends,

It is with a heavy heart and deep sadness that I must tell you I had to help my baby girl Theresa transition to the Rainbow Bridge to be with Angel Tom. It was the hardest decision I have ever had to make. But Dr. Mills assured me I was doing the right thing. For those of you that may not have read about her illness, it is here:

http://lightning-strike.com/forum/index.php?showtopic=7409 and her journey with us here: http://lightning-strike.com/forum/index.php?showtopic=6896

Dr. Mills said the tumor had pretty much consumed her entire tongue, that it would continue to grow and she would never get better or even stabilize. We had our final goodbyes in the room while Dr. Mills went to get what was needed. She did something that she had not done in weeks. She reached up with both paws to my chest to "hug" me and touch my nose. In her eyes I could see she was saying "It's OK daddy, I know it's my time" I told her she was going to be with Angel Tom now. Now she is Angel Theresa.

Se went peacefully and gently on the thick fleece blanket they provided. I have cried, but also tried to keep it together for her sake. The uncontrollable sobbing will come later I'm sure They will call me when her ashes are ready. I never got to do that for Tom or properly say goodbye to him.

I made a video of her just under 2 years ago enjoying the sunshine on the balcony. This is how I want to remember her. Here is the link because I unfortunately I don't know how to embed it.

https://youtu.be/QZglV7hanvM



Warm summer sun,
Shine kindly here,
Warm southern wind,
Blow softly here.
Green sod above,
Lie light, lie light.
Good night, dear heart,
Good night, good night.

Mark Twain at his daughter's funeral. I thought it appropriate for my baby girl.

Before the appointment she went out to the balcony all on her own and enjoyed the sunbeams for several minutes one last time. I'm sorry if this post seems a bit "ham handed" but I'm still in shock, and this is the first time I have ever had to make this kind of decision. Thank you all for reading.

[Tom's Dad]

Thank you moon_beam for your kind words of support. As I said in the other post, comparing my responses now to when I lost Tom probably isn't fair. He was ripped from me with little warning (I don't say no warning because it was there, I just couldn't see it at the time)

It was a shocking discovery after working a full day and no time off after. I suppose this situation is the exact opposite. I had the warning and I was allowed to say goodbye t her properly. I also have time off after. But I think the real reason for this "shut down" is simple:

I know in my head and heart it was the right thing to do for her, and everybody from Dr. Mills, the Banfield personnel, you and MannaPaws agrees. But I still have to process and try to reconcile this. I stood there in that room and ordered her execution. Like I said, I know it was the right decision for her all considered. But a part of me can't escape feeling like some kind of war criminal

I appreciate your support though and I will get through this somehow. But there will be a deep emotional scar for as long as I live.