So Much Pain. So Much Guilt. So Much Anger At Myself., I just can't believe my Iggy was hit by a car so close to home. Options

[ann]

Hi Sheri, first of all, keep plugging away at the fence idea. However Pete might jump it. or how about a tabby tracker. Even thru all this I still believe, if the area is safe enough to let them out. The thing that scares me the most about indoor cats is if they do end of outside by accident, most don't survive.
As for the questioned you asked me, well, to be honest, I feel the same as you. I love Dave very very much, but that whole closeness bit has been tossed out the window. Don't feel it, don't want it. He has learned to accept and move on or at least he seems that way. How long will it take, don't know. At least we can talk and laugh about things a little more, but at the begining it was awful. We hardly spoke at all. I'd go over to his house and just clam up. I couldn't watch t.v. I just kept looking around the house at places he use to be. I still do it, but not as often. Yet as soon as he leaves the room, I make a dash to his ashes and sneak a kiss on them(don't worry they are in a plastic bag still). Once in a while he will mention Arthur and I say nothing or I'll start crying. Today was my first day voulenteering at the animal shelter. He asked "how'd it go"? I almost didn't say anything, but I made the mistake of mentioning they had just got a new cat in that looked just like Arthur. The lookalike I had in my first post had similar features, but this cat had EVERYTHING, the only difference is he's a little larger. I will post later on this when I can get his picture and do a comparison. Anyways, he rolled his eyes and sighed, "will you stop it"..I need his comfort and he won't give it to me..
So anyways, I guess we/they will just have to be paitent with us..Take care..Ann

[MissingMyLittleI...]

A big hug back to you too, Sissycat. I am so glad you found Esme.. or she found you! I am sitting here after another crying jag. I think I am going to be a wreck for a long, long time. I decided yesterday to start every morning by writing a letter to Iggy, but I think I might have to do the writing at night because I am just devastated every time I write. I have to work next week somehow and be clear-headed somehow... and I don't think I can do that right after I write to Iggy.

I definitely feel like we have a connection. Thank goodness I found you here!

I know exactly what you mean when you say you don't think you will have the same special relationship ever again with another cat. I feel the same way, and I feel like I didn't even realize HOW special (I mean, I knew it was GREAT, but I don't think... oh, I don't know what I am trying to say... just that I didn't know this was a once-in-a-lifetime relationship, I guess, but now I know and I am just heartbroken) until Iggy was gone, and it was too late. Now, I have to mourn for my little man, but also for the most significant, pure relationship I have ever had. I can never even hope to have someone like Iggy in my life again, and I am continuously beating myself up over all the little things I could have done (should have done) that would have kept him safe and prevented this from happening. Stupid stuff... like he should have been allowed to sleep with me at night every night, I should have walked up the street and called him until I had him safe in the house with us (he had been wandering more and later lately, and I just chalked it up to him being a very independent, energetic cat), I shouldn't have let him go back out after he brought the bird in (he had to be so full of adrenaline... it's almost like being in shock, and I should know that: I am a biologist!), and the worst of all is that I should have had a reflective collar on him. I always have had reflective collars on my boys, but they have lost collar after collar in the past 6 months or so that it just got so expensive to keep spending $8-9 per collar for the reflective ones... and then my boyfriend went out the last time and bought them collars on a Sunday morning when the pet shop wasn't open, and they only had non-reflective ones and I just thought they would lose them again in no time and we would get reflective collars the next time around. So stupid. So thoughtless. So lazy. So cheap. I didn't even consider the possibility that there wouldn't be a "next time around" and that, without the reflective collar, he would be invisible to cars at night.

Gosh, sissycat, I feel like I am so responsible for his death. I am just in a pit of despair and guilt and grief. Thank you so much for writing to me again: I have finally stopped crying, as I am writing back to you. Thank you!

[sissycat]

If I can even give you a tiny bit of help it is worth it!!!
You listen to my stories just as well.
BLAME--I went throught that too. I blamed myself, my husband, and even a stray cat. It was just her time. We all have a special time and there is no way we can know when it is.

Now for the collars. I just can't put one on my cats. I have seen cats get hung, become tangled in fences and get their own legs hung in them and it cut off the wind pipe. I even found a cat several months ago at the laundry mat behind my house. It had somehow gotten it's front leg in through the collar with his head. He could barely walk or breath. Many years ago I found a stray that had once been someone's cat because it had a collar that was so tight that part of it's skin had grown around it. I know there are break away collars, but I just don't trust them.

I write to my Sissycat every Thursday. Even if it is just a quick little I love or miss you.

Hugs!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[MissingMyLittleI...]

Ann, your honesty and openness mean so much to me. I feel like I changed overnight when Iggy died, and I don't feel like I am ever going to be the same person again. In fact, I don't WANT to be the same person I was because that person didn't "seize the day" and put as much effort and love as I should have and take lots of pictures and videos (I don't have a single video and I already can't hear Iggy's little noises *exactly* as they were in my mind...) and take every precaution I could with little Iggy's life. I just haven't been really *living* my life: I've been bouncing from place to place, and job to job, and haven't settled down yet. I have felt NO contentment in the last two years or more. Happiness, yes, but no contentment.

I feel exactly the same way you did right after Arthur died: I just don't want any closeness at all with Sean, and I can see that he is really upset about this (we talked about it yesterday and he said he felt like, if I could be right next to him and still feel alone, that he wasn't the right guy for me...ugh). I am sure that if I keep pushing him away, something has got to give some time. I think it's got to be really hard for a partner to really "be there" for you while you go through something that you have to get through alone. And then, maybe after being pushed away for so long, they don't have much to offer when you do need them-- maybe this is why Dave reacted the way he did today? I hope this doesn't upset you, to have me offer some &%^ysis, but I feel like we are so close because of what we've been through and am just trying to offer an outsider's perspective.

I am definitely going to look into the fence thing and see what I can do inexpensively, but effectively... and in a house we're renting (I have to check the lease to see what kind of modifications I can make here). I also looked into the tabby tracker thing-- I had never heard of it!-- and then ended up finding this awesome little device called the Loc8tor (http://www.loc8tor.com/introducing-loc8tor.asp) that can be used to find a cat up to 600' away, if they do go missing. Of course, they can wander farther than that, but it's a start...

How did you feel volunteering today? I feel like I would have a complete breakdown with a bunch of animals around without homes. I have a hard time even going to a shelter to pick out a pet: I want to take them all home! But I have been thinking about being a foster home for a kitty. I just worry that I might have trouble with that too: feeling like I should just adopt them instead. Just curious what your reaction was to the volunteering thing...

Thanks again, Ann, and I'm happy you found a kitty who looks so much like Arthur: that must have really made you feel happy on some deep emotional level. I wouldn't be able to resist a cat that looked like Iggy either... I just know my next furbaby will have to be a gray tabby!

Big hug.

[ann]

I really did enjoy voulenteering. It was something I wanted to do for a very long time. Arthur was my first shelter cat. (I'd never been in one b4) I vowed never ever to step foot in one again!. All those cats cooped up in cages day after day. I couldn't bear it. Then I thought well, they are safe and well cared for. That is their home (for now). I started going down once a week to get a feel for the whole thing. Much to my surprised they are let out to run around.(this is a very SMALL place), and the care they get is exceptional. In the past 2mo only 2 cats still remain, all others have come and gone so quickly it really fills my heart with joy.
Anyways I only get to work 1 hr a week. There's so much to do. Mostly cleaning. They all have such indiviual personalities and so much fun to figure them out. It's extremely hard to not get attached.
But I'm in a situation where I live with people who don't want any, so this is my escape so to speak.
I do get emotional from time to time, but Arthur will never be coming back and I have to accept this and move on. Not saying it isn't hard. Would I want another cat that looks like him, I'm leaning towards no. I think it would make me miss him more, if that is even possible. He wasn't your ordinary cat and seeing one that looks so much like him is rare. He is the same age and I thought it might be one of his brothers, but it said he was born Jun406 and Arthur was sometime in Nov of o5.
Like you, I don't think I will be the same person I was, at least not for a very long time. But getting invovled in this has made me feel a little happier. I have a few hours to kill b4 work and all that spare time was spent with Art. This is more rewarding than a part time job. All they want is some love and I sure have a lot to give them...
Dave and I will get back on track sooner or later. 2 out of his 4 kids are having early adulthood dramas in their lives that is keeping us occupied...If you get that tabby tracker, let me know how it is...Hugs..Ann

[MissingMyLittleI...]

Hi Ann. I am so relieved (isn't that funny: I feel we are friends already!) that you are in a small shelter that is so good at finding homes for its kitties. I was imagining you in one of the big shelters, and I guess that wasn't something you would have done anyway... but I just remember how sad it was to walk through the animal shelter in Fort Lauderdale two years ago when I wanted to adopt a kitten. I felt like turning around and running right back out the door!

The rescue I got Pete from was run out of a woman's home, and then she would place the kitties "on display" in quite spacious cages at a nearby pet store: she found this got them adopted faster. It definitely got Pete adopted! I took one look at him and just had to bring him home. The sad thing (especially through this grieving process) is that I just don't have a very close relationship with Pete. I did, before Iggy came into the picture, but then once Iggy was there, I think he just kind of claimed me (and I him) and then Pete bonded with Iggy really well, so I thought, oh well, that's how it's going to be with me and Pete. We'll just both be Iggy's family, but not very close to each other.

The rescue I got Iggy from was a very small shelter on Marco Island and they are just wonderful! Some very wealthy couple with a gorgeous house with attached garage had the shelter in the garage. I remember feeling so confused about whether to walk up and ring at the grand front entrance... not your usual shelter experience! Inside the garage, they had a few cats and kittens in individual cages (the ones who might have spread infections or infestations to the other kitties), and then there was this huge, wonderful kitten cage (floor-to-ceiling, almost and then maybe 8' x 8'!) with maybe a dozen little kittens in it. Iggy was one of them-- I had actually seen him on their web page and fell in love with him then!-- and he came up, crawled onto my legs and fell asleep, purring. He chose me just as much as I chose him.

Anyway, I guess I should have known there were nicer shelters for you to be working at than the big, awful ones. And I am glad you are getting your "kitty fix". Even though I still have Pete, he just won't let me snuggle with him like Iggy did and hates if I whisper sweet little things in his ear... and I have to respect that. That's just how our relationship is. I honestly worry that Pete might have been happier as a single cat: even though he and Iggy bonded very strongly when they were kittens-- and were inseparable!-- their relationship had really changed since I moved from Fort Lauderdale to Key West. I know Pete has to miss him at some level, but he is not seeming miserable without him. He is just miserable because he can't get outside!

I agree with you that getting a "look-alike" cat to Arthur might make your grief for Arthur even worse. I have been trying to tell myself the same thing about getting an Iggy "look-alike" (though I really don't think that's even possible: he was such a weird looking little thing! I so miss all his funny little features. For instance, he had hip dysplasia! I tiny cat with bad hips! He used to lay with them completely opened flat against the ground and seemed to be most comfortable in that strange position!). Somehow, though, I find myself looking at pictures of look-alikes. There will never be another Iggy, and I am so afraid that any new kitty I get is just never going to have the same relationship with me... and if that happened with a look-alike... oh, I think it would be devastating.

I've been thinking I am not going to wait too long to get another kitty. Or at least to start looking... Maybe after the New Year. I just don't know. I think I will know the right one when I see him. And I am sure he will be a gray tabby (my cat Gizmo was one too... I just seem to have the best relationships with them) and I am thinking I should get a young shelter kitten who might initially have some extra vet care needs (making them less adoptable... except to me!).

Well, I am just rambling on and on now. I have been writing to Iggy for the past three mornings, and it just leaves me in such a rung-out feeling state. Ann, thanks so much for writing again: it made me so happy to see I had another "connection" to make this morning! Hang in there, you too, with all the family drama... and write me often. I really like this little friendship we've started! A big hug back to you!

Oh, and I might try the "Loc8tor", which is an actual device... IF I ever let a cat outside again (or maybe as an extra precaution if they are in an enclosure), I am seriously considering using one! The tabby tracker is not a device (unless I found the wrong thing!!! LMK.): it's a website that people go to to post their cat's name, description and zip code so that if they are ever lost, the finder can contact them (and people who find lost cats can post the same info so owners can go there looking for their missing cat). Pretty great service! I will let you know if I try any of these, but for now, Pete is locked inside except with supervision on the back deck that I am 99% sure he can't escape from...

[Jon730]

If anyone else has dealt with something like this, I would really appreciate hearing how you dealt with it. I guess what I feel is that I emotionally (partially) abandoned him, and that ultimately, that led to his increasing independence, and that led to his death. I feel like I failed him.

I had to wait a couple of pages before answering because of the personal horror I felt at the story. As you probably know, I have an Iggy (Ignatius The Great) also, so thoughts of "What would I do if.." had to be managed before I could type.

In retrospect, I could have been more attentive to many of my past friends. Since, as I frequenly rabbit about, the only absolute unconditional love we are really going to experience in Real Life only comes from a cat or dog, in recent years for me, people come second. There are ..what..8 *10^9 people on Earth? You can call or email many of them. I just find less and less special about humans year after year. ONE dog bit me ONCE when I was a paperboy. ONE cat I met ONCE did not like me. If the oceans were ink and the skies were paper I could not list the disagreeable humans I have encountered.

People who do not love animals or understand that love can simply get out of my life, because the quality of devotion I will exchange with an animal is more sincere than any I will experience with a human.
Consider this, as a biologist: What other species TORTURES?
Drive a mile in traffic, read a History Book, or watch any random hour of TV, and decide if you would want 99% of what you see of humanity in your home.

(Just the other day I was thinking of certain relatives, and asked my lawyer if she thought I could adopt Iggy as a son. I have not gotten an answer, and suspect she is concerned for my sanity. She is probably digging up that Hobbs&Warren "Petition for Committment Form..) But I meant it.

In your siituation, all I can say is "Iggy was there first".
But, then, as you can tell, forty years of Corporate Life has made me misanthropic, so my absolutes are certainly a "Your milage may vary" kind of thing!

Your story of course made me think of the dilemma we all have about "Inside or Outside". We know they love the outdoors. They were designed to live there.
Fortunately or not, this decision has been lifted from me by the presence of coyotes here, and all the sad "Missing Cat" posters on telephone poles.
I don't have to face it because it is not an option. In another place, he surely would love a yard to play and hunt in.

[MissingMyLittleI...]

Jon, thank you so much for your post. I too am a big misanthrope-- more than usual after my poor little Iggy was dumped in a dumpster. I have actually been thinking a lot about this in the past few days, and I think my misanthropy should have prevented me from ever thinking the world outside the house-- the world I have no control over!-- was safe. I am really really heartbroken over this and am looking for ways to enclose a space for my other cat Pete so he can still experience the outdoors without being in danger.

I took a look at your profile and all the pics of your Iggy: he is adorable! It touched me so much to hear that he chose you just like my Iggy chose me... you are very lucky. I think I am going to end up getting another kitty in the near future. I just have too much love to give, and I want to give that to another little rescue kitty who needs a mom!

[Jon730]

I took a look at your profile and all the pics of your Iggy: he is adorable! It touched me so much to hear that he chose you just like my Iggy chose me... you are very lucky. I think I am going to end up getting another kitty in the near future. I just have too much love to give, and I want to give that to another little rescue kitty who needs a mom!

At first I fet it would be heartless to "replace" my Catwife, "Mrs. Goodcat". But it has been established and settled that cannot happen. It is carved in stone and established on the seas and founded on the Floods, etc.

Then I began to realize that I simply had a Love Surplus that had nowhere to go. And the August before I lost Miles, I had lost a rare and special human friendship. I had turned into a recluse.

All I can say in summary is that Iggy is a SPOILED and intensely loved little* cat, and an extremely happy one. (Obnoxiously happy- exuberant. He is my lifeline and my Court Jester. Yesterday he was playing "Peekaboo" over the edge of the bathtub when I was taking a bath. And he FELL IN by mistake. You get the picture.) So, no matter how sad I am/was/were/will be about the missing human friendship, or my "marriage" with Miles, Iggy will not stand by and let me bleed. He has ADD, anyway.

You need a loving clown. Pete needs a best friend. When you are ready, or when Fate decides, you will meet one, or one will just simply show up and barge into your life, disrupt it, drive you crazy, and make you laugh. When the time is right.

As I say to people once in a while, a big value of this forum is not only the understanding we get from others, but also the chance to compare a Loss Thread with a New Beginnings thread.

Compare the Miles story with the Iggy Funnies, and the moods of the writing shows up. It shows that happiness can lurk in the Future, even as we fester in despair and desolation.

* (I will always think of him as I met him when he picked me. Even though I grunt when I pick him up now.)

[MissingMyLittleI...]

Thanks so much, Jon. I had actually already done what you suggested and read both your post on Miles and your post on Iggy, and your uplifted mood was definitely apparent! I am already thinking that I need another kitty in my life, and just as you said, no one can replace my incredible little Iggy, but I have so much love to give and I need to have a kitty love me too (as I mentioned elsewhere, Pete and I just do not have the same relationship at all... I think he is actually happy to be getting some extra attention, but he won't let me snuggle him like Iggy did, and he hates if I whisper in his ear...). Now I guess I am just waiting until after Christmas (so hard to do... I absolutely love the holidays and I just don't feel I am going to experience them much this year, except to miss Iggy even more when he's not around to attack the wrapping paper and jump in the bags), since we are flying (with Pete-- little does he know) and I don't want to do that to a baby kitty. Anyway, thanks again and have fun with your Iggy!

[MissingMyLittleI...]

Hi sissycat-- I read your post to me yesterday and thought I had replied, but now I see I didn't. Sorry!!! I keep getting so involved in other things-- to distract myself a bit from the pain-- that I have several windows open all at once, and I must have closed the window without posting my reply. You have definitely been such a source of comfort and compassion to me: a LOT, not just a little.

I actually went looking for information about the actual performance of the break-away cat collars yesterday (maybe this is when I lost my post to you!) and could not find ONE single thing about what % of time they succeed versus fail-- awful. The last reflective collar I had on Iggy seemed really difficult to break away, so I opened and closed it over and over until it seemed loose enough for him to break, if he got stuck somewhere (probably why he lost it, in hindsight). I will LYK if I find anything more on them...

Hope you're having a good day and thanks again!

[sissycat]

Hello and how are you

I need to do some research myself on the collars. I would probably be like you tho. Have it so loose that it would fall off.

Sorry not to write too much right now. Think I am getting a cold and headed to rest. I will later.

Thanks!!!!

Hugs to you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[MissingMyLittleI...]

Hey-- I am sick too! We even have that in common... I am off to sleep, so this is a short one too. Big hug and hope you have sweet dreams of your sweet sissycat. I keep waiting to dream of Iggy, but none yet. I keep hoping, though. G'night and take some vitamin C (I take lysine too: great antiviral).

[sissycat]

Couldn't sleep so here I am again. Guess what I just bought a bottle of Lysine yesterday. Have never tried it. The pharmisist refered it to me.

Just wanted to say wish I would dream of her. Been over 6 months and not one dream. Many people dream of their passed furpets. Why can't I? I have had 2 experiences where she brushed against my leg in the kitchen. I am thankful for both.

Try to sleep again.

Hugs!

[Jon730]

Just wanted to say wish I would dream of her. Been over 6 months and not one dream. Many people dream of their passed furpets. Why can't I? I have had 2 experiences where she brushed against my leg in the kitchen. I am thankful for both.

Some people think a dream is the mind's way of getting us back into deeper sleep. "I am waking up! Quick! Tell a story, and get my interest!". A nightmare is a dream that fails its purpose.<P>
I rarely dream of Miles..only a few times. I suspect my mind knows it would upset me, and I would then be awake for good.

Too bad, because it would be worth waking up for. Oh Well.

[MissingMyLittleI...]

Good morning sissycat. I hope you managed to get some sleep. How funny that you just bought some lysine!?! It really does work, even after you already have the cold (unlike all the preventative stuff). I haven't dreamt of my Iggy either and it makes me really sad. I used to study neuroscience in grad school and it doesn't make sense scientifically either to not have dreams about someone you are thinking about so much of your day, and right before bed. I keep hoping, though... but I think if I do dream about him, I am going to be even sadder waking up without him.

It's one week today since we found out he had been hit by the car, and it was probably a week ago last night that he actually got hit... while it was dark outside. I still can't believe he's gone (though I know it's true), and now I am in some new stage of grieving that is more disturbing than sad: I find myself just feeling numb about it, like someone pulled a thick blanket over my emotions. It's all my emotions, really: I just feel numb, and then I feel badly because I want to just keep crying over him. But the tears only come very briefly a couple of times a day...

I don't know if it's because my brain has decided I had enough pain for a little while, and I am just getting a break and then it will start up again... I just can't imagine that's IT, and I'm just getting past this. At my core, I don't feel that way at all, but on the outside, the tears/emotions just aren't showing themselves. Have you experienced anything like this? I really hate it. I just want to FEEL all of this... even though it is so intensely painful... because it is so intensely painful. I lost this little beautiful innocent cat, who still looked like a really long kitten and still behaved like a kitten and who I had this INCREDIBLE relationship with... and I want to keep mourning him. But I just feel numb. It started on Sunday afternoon, after I had been crying all morning... and I haven't been feeling everything fully since.

Maybe it's partly because i am sick?

Anyway, I have so much to do today (and maybe this is another reason why I am unable to feel all this fully: I got NOTHING done last week, and it's finals week next week and I have SO much to do, I am overwhelmed). I have to get to work, and then I teach two 3-hour blocks (11-2 and 7-10) with grading and exam writing in between. Ugh.

Well, big hug to you this morning and I hope you feel a bit better and I will be hoping to the universe for you that you dream of your sissycat soon.

[MissingMyLittleI...]

Good morning Jon. I agree with you: I think it would be both painful and wonderful for me to dream of Iggy, and I would gladly take the pain and the "morning after" to be able to experience him that way. I have been looking at photos of him all day long, and right before bed, and still no dreams. I just wrote to sissycat and told her this doesn't even make sense from the neuroscience perspective: if you are really focused on something, you tend to have lots of dreams about it. Perhaps I am still just too focused on my guilt because I sure am having dreams about that: Sunday night, I dreamt I left some electrical cord dangling on some machine-- even though I knew the thing could hurt or kill someone-- because I just had to walk away from it for a minute and I was too lazy to take the thing apart. Seconds after walking away, I hear a woman scream and saw her touching the cord and then falling to the floor. I woke up with a racing heart... and such sorrow, because I knew it was a metaphor for what I feel I did to my poor Iggy. Ugh.

I hope your Iggy is giving you much joy, and as I said to sissycat, I will be appealing to the universe on both your behalfs (behalves, I guess...) to let you dream of your dear kitties. I hope you see Miles in dreams soon!

Big hug.
Sherri

[Jon730]

because I just had to walk away from it for a minute and I was too lazy to take the thing apart. Seconds after walking away, I hear a woman scream and saw her touching the cord and then falling to the floor. I woke up with a racing heart... and such sorrow, because I knew it was a metaphor for what I feel I did to my poor Iggy. Ugh.

It could be. Dreams speak in the language of symbols. It is not always a bad thing...a lot of ideas have come to me through them. One of my patent attorneys bought a new Jaguar. (Interestingly enough, *I* did not..)

I do not feel cheated because of not dreaming of Miles often. From the day she climbed up on my lap, and stared into my eyes, and I had the amazing realization that "There was someone living in there", I know she will always be with me.

I hope your Iggy is giving you much joy, and as I said to sissycat, I will be appealing to the universe on both your behalfs (behalves, I guess...) to let you dream of your dear kitties. I hope you see Miles in dreams soon!

Everyone remarks on him being a laugh a minute.
But still, I know someday there will be a proportionate and terrible price for this joy, as always.
He has gotten a LOT of extra cuddles because of your story. And, as a cat, he is not questioning it, he is living in the present and gobbling it up.

[sissycat]

Hello Sherri,

Just in from work and what is the first thing I do. (everyday) Get on L/S to see whats going on with everyone.
Yes, I have experienced the come and go emotions. As we have all described it is like waves or rollercoaster rides. Up and down and so forth. You think you are getting stronger then crash it all rushes right back again. The spaces inbetween vary. It is so normal. Being sick and work could play a part in it. I would feel guilty. Like I should be grieving, crying, or hurting more than I did at times. Guess it is just part of the healing. I would sorta keep track of how long it was inbetween my crying spells. Gradually it gets farther apart. I do still have my cry time. Even if it just lasts a few minuites.

I couldn't make myself move any of the stuff she had been sleeping on for the longest time. I finally got a baggy and collected all the fur I could off of it. There is still a few things she slept on. Maybe i'll never move it. Maybe i will, but right now i am just not ready to.

I write Sissycat every Thursday. It is the anniversary of her passing.

I have tried to make myself have dreams of her. One would think if that is what you are thinking of when you go to sleep it would be your dreams. Not true. Maybe someday.

Can I ask how you take the Lysine? He didn't really explain. Do you only take when you feel sick or everyday or how.

Hope you day went well!!

Kim

[MissingMyLittleI...]

Thanks, Jon. I am so glad your Iggy got some extra love... it makes me feel like my Iggy did somehow too! I am *swamped* with work (yes, at 11pm) because I did *nothing* last week until Friday afternoon, and I have students turning in late assignments, students who need replacement assignments, students taking their finals early so they can fly to family elsewhere for the holidays... ugh. But I wanted to just send a quick reply to you and say sweet dreams to you and Iggy and Miles! Hugs!