Can't Stand The Pain, Give the cat back to God Options

[Major Catastroph...]

I am faced with the decision to put my cat to sleep. I have tried perscriptions to stop him from urinating in the house but it is at its worst He is wrecking our house.The humane society won't take him because of his "problem" I talked to the director moments ago and he said putting him down is the most humane thing to do. All I can do is CRY & CRY & & CRY.......I am ANGRY my wife brought him home in the first place. I am ANGRY at the cat for making me go thru this intense pain I don't want to go thru. I am deeply, deeply SADDENED that I will never see my freind again. I must make the appointment to get this unpleasantry done tommorrow when I come home from work in the morning. I feel sick to my stomach and I feel stupid because of the intense greif I feel now. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME!!!!! It's only a cat.....but it isn't...it's my cat and I love him and I would just like to stop crying..........

[CATTYBIRD]

It's not really "only a cat." It's part of your family, and yes, your going to be sad about putting the cat down. Don't ever be afraid to grieve for your animals. I lost my cat Kitt to cancer in February, and yes, I am still grieving over her. So, there is nothing "wrong" with you. And don't let people tell you it's "just a cat," because it's obviously much more. I'm so sorry that your going to have to have to have the cat put down. If you need to talk, I'm here for you.

[LS Support]

It's only a cat.....but it isn't...it's my cat and I love him and I would just like to stop crying..........

i think men (myself included) find the death of a cat to be incongruent with how we were raised...to be
strong in the face of adversity and not to show our emotions. take it from me, there is no real way to
actually stop yourself from crying...it will stop when you are ready for it to stop. feel the grief for
now, as it is a critical first step towards healing. writing it out here can be very therapeutic as well.

[SJ J & S]

It would be a sad thing if you stopped yourself from crying, you have a lot of emotions you need to release, if only to make you stronger tomorrow to face what you have to do.

If per chance you back down and decide not to go ahead with this, maybe you could try healing, a spiritual church would be more than happy to recommend someone or even maybe let you bring him to the church.

My dogs weed in my kitchen for 16 years it was only the last year that I found Greenleaf tablets which I gave them for their arthritis and it worked for kidneys too and I actually had a whole year of no puddles in the morning (they didn’t wee every single day but id say at least once a month).

My heart goes out to you as I know what you are going through waiting for tomorrow, this decision is not an easy one to make and I will send healing prayers to you to help you through.

Love Sue

[Muffins]

Everyone here will tell you that crying is a VERY NORMAL EMOTION.......It is a way to start "feeling better", because what you are going through right now if VERY, VERY SAD & TRAUMATIC!!

How old is your very special furbaby?? How long has he been in your life?? Does the veterinarian know why he is urinating in the house?? ? physical problem or behavioral?

I worked in the medical field years ago, and I know that from roughly the late 80's to early 90's, they were able to use a prescription drug called "DDAVP", for young boys who "wet the bed", with wonderful results.
I don't know if this drug is still used, and/or if it's still used to treat urinating problems---I just wanted to mention it in case it hasn't been thought about.

I know you said that your cat was on a precription, and it hasn't seemed to be helping. I am sincerely sorry about that!!

In our case, our beloved Ernestine had significant kidney disease (along with 2 other problems), and she did not respond AT ALL to the treatment that cats with CRF are usually given. So, on 2/7/2004, we had to have her put to sleep.

I'm sure the vet has spoken to you and your wife about options (if there are any, at all), that might be available to your cat....??? And, I am very, very sorry that the medication has not worked.

I want to say that, "Of COURSE YOU LOVE YOUR CAT...", and "THE TEARS THAT YOU ARE CRYING, ARE TEARS THAT WILL HELP TO HEAL YOU ---- ALL IN TIME"..

I can honestly understand how you are feeling -- when you mentioned your "sick stomach"... It hurts & it hurts like HELL!!!

He's more than "a cat"; he's your friend!!! And, he always will be!! No matter what the decision has to be, YOUR FRIEND KNOWS THAT YOU LOVE HIM WITH ALL OF YOUR HEART!!!!!!

Please let us know how you you are doing -- we all care.

Peace to you,

Denise

[Major Catastroph...]

He is six and now I find myself avoiding him like I am trying to detach myself from him. If this is healing I don't like it, I don't like it one bit. I wish I could be one of those people right now who say, "It's only a cat..." I'm not eating , I'm not sleeping, and sometimes I even wish it was me and not the cat

[LittleGirl's...]

Hi,

SO sorry to hear about what you and your sweet cat are facing. What is his name?

If none of the prescriptions have worked, then you may be facing a very heart-wrenching ordeal (I know, from reading your letters, that the grief has already begun...). Putting a sweet pet to sleep is a humane act... there's no suffering, and when he passes, he'll be in complete bliss and surrounded by perfect love , I have no doubts. The hard part is for you to get through. You are still in your physical body and you are losing the physical form of someone you love dearly. But his spirit lives on, and I totally believe that your spirit will be fully reunited with him, when it's your time.

Sending you comfort and strength,

Little Girl's Mommy, Kathy

[shadded dreams]

I know all too well your pain. I watched my beloved Zipper die. He got sick on thursday. The vet gave me pills, told me to hope for the best. Every time I looked at him with his sweet eyes, he trusting look he had for me, I just wanted to die inside. I'd sit and cry & cry. I'd tell myself, and anyone who'd listen, "HE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW HE'S DYING!!". He'd still follow me everywhere, and sit with me, and sleep with me, then on Saturday he took a turn for the wost and had to have him put down!! I felt like I was dying inside! A piece of me was being ripped out, then I figured out, it was my heart. My husband actually cried and cried more than I did the first night. He always pretended he didn't like my dog. But deep down inside he really did love him. That was in March, March 6th Zip died. I know how you feel. I hate that feeling so much. I felt so helpless. Please take it from me personally, don't be afraid to love that cat!! Don't push him away, he loves you!! He needs you, hold him as much as you can. The time will come that you can't hold him again. And you will feel worse about it. It's ok to cry, you need to. Grief sucks, yes that is true. But there is a light at the end of the tunnel for you, you just have to look. If anyone told me that I was going to feel better eventually, I'd have thought they were nuts. But I kept coming in here, and reading past posts to learn everyone else had been in the same boat as me. It makes you feel better to know that we understand. He'll never be "just a cat", and don't wish that. It's always better to have loved and lost than never loved before. I wouldn't give back the 11 1/2 years with my dog, just to erase my pain. And I'm sure if you searched, neither would you. Keep posting for us, we're here for you...HUGS--Zippers Momma

[SJ J & S]

I cried so many tears after having Jude put to sleep that I either burnt or wiped away so many layers of skin on the top of my cheeks that the tears would sting where it was so raw.

Imagine what that energy would have done to me if had not let it out, maybe it would have transformed into cancer or a heart attack – I don’t know but I do know it is better to release it than try and bottle it up and end up exploding, if energy has to be used in some way or another let it be in tears.

I can only urge you to have a cuddle – even if you don’t look him in the eye give him a cuddle, you are going to feel guilty after he has gone and start searching for every reason under the sun to punish yourself – I should have done this – I shouldn’t have done that – don’t let it be that you didn’t say goodbye and have a cuddle before he went.

Maybe you will find sleep with him in your arms.

I wish you peace and will think of you today (I'm from England) and hoping you are getting some sleep tonight.

Love Sue

[Major Catastroph...]

I CAN"T DO IT.....I WON"T DO IT. I talked to our vet this morning. She is aware of the cats problem and we have been working on this for a few years now. I am going to build him his own "Piper" (his name) room in the basement. It will have his toys, his food & water, and his litterbox in it. He is a total indoor cat and has never been outside. He would not be able to take care of himself if he did. I remember last summer he got mad at a cat outside the window and knocked out the screen thus escaping. He was missing for 4 days and I aged 4 years. I cried myself to sleep every night. He came back severely injured and I rushed him to the cat hospital. After all we have been thru, me and the cat, I just can't put him down. He is a very big cat and scares everybody that comes in the house because of his temper and behavior. We have to segregate him from company. He only seems happy when there is just me & him. He will crawl on my lap, flip over on his back and drool like the dickens while I scratch him. Nobody has ever seen him do this except for my wife. He will not do this on my wifes lap , only mine. She calls him "Daddies kitty" because he seems ill at ease with everyone but me. This incident and last summers have really opened my eyes about something in my behavior. I spent many years in the army and saw 2 combat tours which yeilded horrors that a human should not be exposed to....yet I weathered them so much better than this. I seem to have more respect and admiration for all 4 legged creatures than some of the 2 legged ones that cause trouble and heartache for people in the world. What is wrong with me? Am I misguided? I was raised by good parents who taught me the value of life but all animals seem more inportant to me than some people. I think something is wrong with me.................

[CATTYBIRD]

Major. Believe me, there is nothing wrong with you. I happen to prefer animals over people myself. Obviously you and Piper have a very special bond. If your happy with the decision you made, I say, GOOD FOR YOU! Is Piper healthy except for the # problem? If your both happy, I think that's all that matters.

[runningplace]

Please add me to the list of humans who prefer the company of animals. The major reason I miss my little Pumpkin so much, is that I am certain that she loved me more than I have ever been loved in my entire life. I was the center of her universe and she worshipped me. I knew that she would not judge me, let me down or reject me for any reason.
I have never been totally comfortable around my fellow humans and the 'soul mates' of my life have been my animal companions.

[Tracey]

You can add me to the list as well. I've always prefered the company of animals as I've had too many people let me down in my life. I find life is just BETTER with pets in it.

I'm sorry you are going through this with your cat. My dog was sick for some time and although I regularly check with my vet as to Megan's quality of life I still felt guilty for keeping her alive as long as I did. It was very important to me that she did not suffer and when she stopped meeting me at the door at the end of the day and the sparkle went out of eye, I knew it was time to say goodbye. Once I made the decision I had to wait a week before I could get in with my vet. So everyday I spent every spare moment with Megan. My husband would lift her onto our bed for me and then go sleep on the couch just so that I could be with her.

I hope you guys make it through this and as someone has already said...we are here for you.

Tracey

[Muffins]

Hi!!!

God bless you & Piper:

Bravo!!!! I am happy to hear about the "Piper room"....Actually, I'm ecstatic, as I'm sure you are & Piper is!!!!!
Well Done!!!!

It sounds as if you & Piper have an extra strong bond, which I think is fantastic....I'm happy about this....

Nooooooo, there is nothing wrong with you!!!!!!!

Cats/dogs/all of our beloved animals; they prefer one lap to another's lap.....

I know that my cat, Ernestine, who had to be put sleep on 2/7/2004, preferred me, her mom..... I had had her
for 16 & 1/2 years before her daddy, Ben came along.....
But, as far as our new kitties, Lucy & Yo-Yo, they love their daddy too, he provides very well for them.....but, I'm
here all day with them...? Maybe they know me better????

You've seen the HELL of this world; I THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart; BUT, I AM SORRY THAT YOU HAD
TO SEE ANY OF THIS HELL!!! IT MAKES ME SICK, AND I AM VERY, VERY SORRY!!

Our little furfamilies, they're sooooo non-judgemental & loving..... THEY ARE "WHERE IT'S AT"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I truly wish you & Piper & your wife sooooo much love!!!!

Life will be better. Piper will have his own beautiful home.... Life will be great!!!!

God Bless you!

Peace & Love,

Denise & Ben

[Major Catastroph...]

The piper room is near completion. It is hard to come here because I read all of these posts and look at the pictures and it makes me cry. I am such a sap. You all have been so supportive. Our pets in total are 4 and are as follow:
Piper - male cat, 6years old, total indoor cat (daddies kitty)

Rusty - female cat, stray, age unknown She spent a whole winter outside before we could get close to her . One day a year ago we opened the door to see what she would do. She ran into the house and hasn't left yet (mommies kitty)

Abigail - female sable ferret, 6years old (daddies other baby)

Chase - female brown ferret, 3 years old (mommies other baby)

In time God will claim back the 4 gifts he bestowed upon me. I will grieve deeply my loss and barter with the good Lord to give them back. Why are we so resistant to a process that is inevitable to all life on earth.? Why am I so selfish that I can manufacture the phrase " I want MY babies BACK!!!" , when they were never truly mine in the first place. I am only the caretaker, and the Lord wants it that way. So who the heck am I to exert my will and change His? . We are the caretakers of the domestic, it is en%%bent upon us all, to shield all forms of these creatures from harm for the very nature of the word domestic implies that: "We are responsible for their care and protection!" May all you and your "furry families" live long and healthy lives. God bless you all..............

[shadded dreams]

Bravo for you Major!! I'm glad that you have tried to work out your problem with Daddies kitty!! I too am on that list of people who prefer animals over humans. My beloved Zipper was the only thing in my life who loved me no matter what!! He was always happy to see me, no matter what I'd done. He was the only one who didn't laugh at my hopes and dreams!! So, no, I think you are as normal, as normal pet lovers can be!! I hope you still post, and let us know how things are going!! Its great to have a little hapiness in here.......HUGS....Zippers Momma

[mittens_is_gone]

Der Major,
I am sorry for the problems that you are having. I hope having a room just for Piper works out. Good for you that you found a way to keep your special guy and solve the wee problem.
You are quite a wonderful person for feeling so strongly about your pets.
I think pets are better than a lot of people. Considering what you have probably seen in your military career, it is no wonder you feel strongly about your pets. The unconditional love that they give is wonderful. It is a gift.
They are gift, and not one any one of us wants to give up when the time comes. Love them while they are with you. Know that they are in a better place when they pass on.
I hope all is going well for you now.
Take care.
Janice