Only In My Dreams-a Song For Cosmo, 4 months ago today, sadness ensues Options

[mosmommy]

Hi to all. I haven't posted recently, but I have come by to read and send thoughts of love and healing to the many stories of loss.
I lost my Cosmo 4 months ago today, and my pain is still fresh. Most of you who know me, know how much I love him. You also know that I like to write down lyrics to some of my favorite songs that speak to me about loving and losing Mo. For those of you who don't know, I am a HUGE Bon Jovi fan, and the songs I have listed are from them. Well, I have another one that has recently taken hold of my heart, and makes me think of my beloved Cosmo. I just wanted to share it with anyone who may be interested as I am sure you will feel the same way about it and your babies, as I do.

ONLY IN MY DREAMS- sung by Tico Torres, drummer for Bon Jovi- from the boxed set "100,000,000 Bon Jovi Fans Can't Be Wrong" ( Disc 3, song 3)

Barkeep pour me one last shot, 'cause I must be on my way
Gotta make that same old stop, that this soul makes everyday
Tell me why am I holding on? Harry, why is love like a flame?
It burns you when it's hot, but Cupid's fire trucks never came
I can't bend the hands of time, so I think myself to sleep
The way you never said goodbye, if only in my dreams

Tell me where you want to go
Tell me what you long to be
How you're longing for my touch
If only in my dreams
Sing the love songs you once sung
Touch the stars you want to reach
And I will see the job gets done
If only in my dreams

Lord, I'd sacrifice my eyes; there's nothing else I'd rather see
You can have my heart - it's of little use to me
And if you want my soul I'd throw it in for free
It's all I'm worth that's left, since my angel got her [his] wings
Now I'm down and on my knees; it's of little use to pray
Unless you give her [him] back, but there's no deals cut these days
They're only in my dreams

Tell me where you want to go
Tell me what you long to be
Are you longing for my touch?
If only in my dreams
We'll sing the love songs you once sung
Touch the stars you wanna reach
And I'll see the job gets done
If only in my dreams

Now I curse the daytime
When I'm alone at nighttime
'Cause I swore the sun shined just for you
And I know you anywhere
There ain't no pain, there ain't no tears
And if I have my way, from the moment I get there

Take me where you wanna go
We'll be who you wanna be
All I needed was your touch
All I want is you and me
We'll sing the love songs you once sung
And you'll be in my dreams
Until that war is won
It's only in my dreams

Well, I'm crying now, if only you could hear the sadness in the voice- the words do not do it justice. I have listened to Bon Jovi for 19 years, and their songs ALWAYS touch me, especially now without Mo. If anyone is interested, and has not read the other 3 songs, go to the 3 following links to read them.
http://lightning-strike.com/forum/index.ph...t=ST&f=4&t=1811
http://lightning-strike.com/forum/index.ph...t=ST&f=4&t=1900
http://lightning-strike.com/forum/index.ph...t=ST&f=7&t=1742
I will say good-bye for now, but know my heart goes out to each of you in your times of pain and loss.
Love,
Michelle

[lewcynt]

Dear Michelle,

I remember when I first came to LS and you and the others gave me hopeful words of support and encouragement. I am forever greatful. I am sorry to hear that you are still in pain. It never seems to end.
Sending you happy thoughts
And a ((((((great big hug)))))))

Love, Cynthia

[Kathleen032]

Dear Michelle,

I'm always touched by the songs you post that remind you of Cosmo. I know on Shiloh's 4 month anniversary I was still very, very sad. I think her 6 month anniversary was a turning point for me. At 6 months I had a letting go ceremony for her and that really helped. I found the ceremony on a website. If you'd like I can post it or PM it to you.

You and Cosmo are in thoughts on his 4 month anniversary.
Hugs,
Kathleen

[mosmommy]

Thanks Cynthia and Kathleen ( and, yes Kathleen, I would like that link, Thanks),
Yesterday was a difficult day to say the least, but luckily I had my appointment with my counselor and she helped me alot while I was there. It's endearing that she actually wells up with tears whenever I cry for Cosmo. ( She has a 13 year old dog, and I think she knows what she is in for , but I gave her the address for LS for when she needs it) I actually met her in 2000, and stopped seeing her in October 2002, but with the loss of Cosmo, and all of life's unfortunate events, I sought her help again. Her name is Cathleen too, she spells it different though.
I hope you enjoyed the lyrics, I listened to the song alot yesterday, and cried everytime.
I hope you are both doing O.K., and know that I am thinking of you both as well.
Love,
Michelle