Lost My Boy Jake And Need Help Coping Options

[LoveThem]

I'm glad your vet put up the warning. I have had a boxer/shepherd mix, a golden shepherd (put down age 3 due to epilepsy), my first silver & black shepherd with the mask face (lost final battle with cancer at age 10 but had beat it at age 5) and my last one (before my 3 feral kittens were born in my backyard), another silver & black orphan puppy with the mask face (spinal cord problem at age 12). I mention the mask face cause I see Jake has it also. Something so special looking into that face. Mine liked to stand up and "hug".

I really hope there is more written about this condition. If you get a chance you might ask your vet when you are there with another of your babies.....if there is research going on...what is the important symptom..how to avoid it. Is there an area on the Internet this information can best be found.

It totally amazes me that I never heard of something that we could lose our babies to..that is 2nd only to cancer in taking them away.

When I got my dogs as puppies years ago, I bought all the books I could find about taking care of them...and I never ever read about this. Seems like a crime that more warnings and information are not out there, especially in all vet hospitals and clinics.

Sorry to go on about this but it just totally upsets me to tears to hear about this condition and realize for so many, many years...I did not know about it, never heard anyone have the problem, never had it myself with my dogs.

I will never forget what happened to Jake and I will certainly tell anyone who has a big dog and remember for myself also...that this exists.

I guess the closest I ever heard was how colic is dangerous to horses and when I saw the word bloat in your post...I thought of that and could see how colic could be a danger to anyone..and then I looked up bloat and it makes me so angry I never read any warning about this condition in any list of medical things to watch for when you are raising a puppy, or an adult dog.

Bless Jake...I am glad he was part of your life and I am so very sorry you did not have him for many more years. Your vet's posting may save a life in the future. (Which means Jake may save lives in the future).

Hugs
Judy

I look forward to your pictures when you get them ready...when you are ready.

[AngelCareOne]

The picture you posted of the Shepherd reminded me of one I had very simuliar of Jake.
I will post it here so you can see it.
My son, who will be 14 in January was also very close to Jake. The two of them played chase
out in the yard all the time, and most of the time my son got tackled by Jake but he loved
every minute of it. Jeremy like me took it hard when Jake died. I will never ever forget his
words to me. He said "Mama please tell me you are going to bring my puppy back home to
me, please tell me he is going to be okay" It hurt to see him in pain and I could do nothing
to help. When we went to the vet to see Jake after he passed my girls and I went into the room
to see Jake, but my son stood outside the door just looking at him and would not go in. I didn't
force him to go in of course because I know everyone has their own ways of dealing with the
pain. My oldest daughter, took one of the pictures I have of Jake and sat down with charcoal
and did a beautiful drawing of him for me. I now have that framed, and she wrote "Jake
forever in our hearts" I know that was therapy for her, her way of dealing with it. I think about
my boy all the time, he is always on my mind. I can't help but go over this in my mind over and
over again, what if I had done something different would it have saved him.
And I keep thinking before he passed he must have been wondering where his mommy was,
why I wasn't with him. I think that hurts more than anything.
You guys have truly been a blessing to me, it helps so much to talk about Jake and I can't thank
you enough for listening.

Hi again, I'll get back to the photo at the end after I'm done speaking with you.

How very difficult for you and your 14 year old son both. They played bunches, your son got tackled by Jake and I can just hear your son laughing whenever that happened. My gosh, how you must have felt when your son said that about bringing his puppy back home. HUGS!!!

I can certainly understand how you and your girls went in to see Jake after he passed but your son just kept sort of peeking. Kind of like to get one more look see at Jake and imagine him sleeping so peacefully. At least, I hope that's what your son was thinking.

I remember when it was time to euthanize Maiden doggie after we my wonderful late husband and I did all we could to keep her going. It was time. We both knew it. I am so very, very lucky to have the Vet that I do. Many times I could swear he's the reincarnation of St. Frances of Assisi as he cares and loves each and every fur kid. Also has a real connection with them. Bless him!

Anyway, both Kenny and I went into the exam room while my Vet got everything ready. Poor Kenny started to cry, said he couldn't do this and had to leave the room. Hey, Maiden was drugged, feeling no pain and happy pretty much as I do feel your Jake was before he went to sleep. Honest and for true. So, I petted Maiden while Dr. Gabor gave the shot, Maiden went to sleep, I kept petting her, hugging her and it took both Dr. Gabor and two techs to lovingly and gently pull me away from her as I laid there on the floor hugging her so tightly.

Many times it's best not for the mommy or daddy to be there when their fur kid passes on. Sure, there are those who have many reasons that they just gotta be there. However, and I have links to websites with actual case histories, lots of people regret so much that they stayed while their fur kid was being euthanized because it's their last memory and they so much would rather have their last memory of their doggie or kitty happy, being held, petted and so on. It's kind of like a "Catch 22" or more like a stuck between a rock and a hard place decision because one doesn't know how they'll feel afterwards until it's over.

That is the most loving, wonderful thing of your oldest daughter to do when she did the charcoal drawing for you and wrote what she did. Bless her heart! And yes, I am certain it was great therapy for her, too. Absolutely.

We all, or at least most of us do that, "What if I had done something that could have saved my fur kid." And, we pray that we come to realize there was nothing else that could have been done and know in no uncertain terms that we did everything and I do mean everything that could have been done. Hon, you did do everything that could have been done. Jake had far too much damage to his liver and there's nothing anyone could have done to make it better, Dear One. Honest.

As far as your thoughts of him thinking where you were and why weren't you with him, I can say from experience that he was probably "high" for lack of any better word, or sleeping very comfortably while feeling no pain nor fear. It is a fact that doggies and kitties do not fear death and don't even have a concept of what it is when it applies to themselves. True.

You see, I was a nurse for over 26 years as well as an animal care volunteer and worked in Animal Rescue and Rehabilitation for close to 30 years. I've shared several true accounts with some people in Private Message here so please feel free to ask me any questions you wish either here or in PM and I'll answer them to the best of my ability. More Hugs!!!

On to the photo you posted of Jake smiling. I did a double take. Wow! Okay, first I applied enhancement features, sharpened the image and framed it. He is sooooo Beautiful. See?



Then I looked at Jake's photo more closely. The one I posted as an example of how Jake might look while smiling was obtained when I did a google image search. But look at the image I chose and I did then decrease the size of Jake's photo that you posted. Both have the left ear (well it's his right, but is camera left) ... Just a bit cropped off at the top. I didn't do that with the image I chose. It came like that. Also look at their eyes, noses, tongues, facial position facing straight ahead and so on. Wow! The image I chose as an example looks so much like his real photo it's uncanny. Here, I'll put them side by side.



Tons of Hugs, Love, Peace and Many Angels to You and Jake!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

[Steve K.]

Jake's Mom,

I am so sorry that you lost your friend at such a young age. I lost my Woody on 09/11/08 when he was hit by a car and had to be put down. Woody was only four years old. I wasn't home when it happened. My wife took Woody for a walk and he got away from her and ran into the street. He was on a leash but he was too strong for Steph. I wasn't there for my boy when he passed either. I can truly say that I know exactly how you feel. All off the advice and good wishes that you get here is from people who know how we feel because they have experienced the loss of a furry child. Come back often. Post as much as you want. It has helped me and I'm sure it will help you. God bless.


Steve K.

[Luv4myJake]

Was going through some pictures the other night on my photobucket account and found
some old pictures of Jake when he was a pup.
I can't even believe how fast time flys, looking at the pictures it seems like yesterday.
When you guys see the picture of Jake and my son, I think you will be able to understand
their bond.
As I read everyones story of how they lost their babies, its just absolutely heartbreaking.
I know how much that hurts and I would never wish that on anyone. Steve K, I am
so so sorry to hear about your baby. I know you had to have been in total shock when
your baby got hit by the car, how horrible that must have been for your wife and you!
I'm glad you came here to share with everyone.

I do believe just being able to talk to others who know what I'm
going through has helped me a lot. know that I will be praying
for you both as you go through this difficult time.

Dottie, thank you again for the changes you made to Jakes picture, that was just
absolutely unbelieveable to see them side by side, I immediately thought it looked
like the picture I had of Jake, but seeing them next to each other... WOW!

[AngelCareOne]

You're very welcome and I was so very amazed as well seeing those photos side by side.

Like you said, "Wow!"

Awww! There's Jake smiling so big along with your son. Hmmm? Your son is smiling, too. But, Jake doesn't feel persuaded that he's as Happy as he could possibly be. So, Jake wants to give this message to your 14 year old boy.

I resized the photo, enhanced, framed it, and ... Would you please have your son turn up the volume and click on the photo of them together with Jake as a puppy so he can give your son a message? Thanks! Okay, click on the photo.

Goodness Gracious! Jake sure had a lot to sing and show your son.

I hope he enjoyed and you did too, Dear One!

Tons of Comforting Hugs, Love, Angels plus Ren and Stimpy songs and Smiles from Jake!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

[AngelCareOne]

Hi, I'm back again. This just took me a little while cuz I'm a tiny bit "visually challenged" as I put it. I thought you might like to have all
the photos at the size you posted them to be enhanced, images sharpened and framed, too. Since I'm not sure if you prefer silver or gold, I did both. Okay? I'm sorry there wasn't much I could do with the small photo but I did correct the saturation, hues, sharpen and frame that one as well in both silver and gold. There's a bunch and they're pretty large so I'll put the URL links here for you to click, bring them up and see. God Bless You Most Abundantly, Dear One!!! Here are the links to click on. Okay?

http://i96.photobucket.com/albums/l179/MyS...pySmall-2-1.jpg

http://i96.photobucket.com/albums/l179/MyS...uppySmall-2.jpg

http://i96.photobucket.com/albums/l179/MyS...ppyAndSon-2.jpg

http://i96.photobucket.com/albums/l179/MyS...ppyAndSon-3.jpg

http://i96.photobucket.com/albums/l179/MyS...onAgain-1-2.jpg

http://i96.photobucket.com/albums/l179/MyS...onAgain-1-1.jpg

Tons More Comforting Hugs, Love, Angels, Hope and Faith!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

PS. I forgot to tell you that I cropped off the bottom gray part on the one photo. I hope you don't mind. More Hugs!!!

[Luv4myJake]

Dottie,

Oh my gosh, they ALL look so beautitul!!! Thank YOU SO MUCH!!!!
I will be sure to share the photo with the song with my son, he had
just turned 11 when those pictures were taken and will be 14 this Jan.
Its unbelievable how much he's changed!
When I showed him the pictures on photobucket that I had come across
with Jake, he just broke down and started bawling....and I can't take that
pain from him.... I wish I could.
Again thank you so much! YOU are an angel!!!!

[LoveThem]

Those puppy pictures bring back a lot of memories for me. I have a number of them I took with my special girl, Gypsy. I just put a new topic in the Tributes Section called A Dog's Prayer for my 2 special GS girls. You might want to see it. Gypsy I got as a puppy and saw her mom and dad and picked the puppy with the biggest feet. It was the two of us when I was by myself in my 20's.
After I lost her to cancer, I got Lady and she is the one my husband knew best as she came in our home...also as a small puppy, abandoned..needing a home..and stayed 12 years.

All the animals I have had in my lifetime were very much loved and special in their own ways but for some reason, we find there are some that just add a certain spark to our lives..that is theirs alone.

It sounds like Jake was that way so very much. In time, a GS puppy might help your son...giving him a furry one to hug. He won't forget Jake but he can learn there is lots of love out there waiting for a home and for a boy who will be very special to them.

Hugs to you both...I understand how much Jake is missed.

Judy