Sweet Little Chan Passed Away Last Friday..... Options

[JanEeee]

My darling kitten moved on to another experience early last Friday. She was such a sparkling personality, embracing life and so full of joy, it seems impossible that she is gone. She went quickly, so unexpectedly, only 5 months old.

I think one of the hardest things is that I was out of town the entire time she was sick. I could only manage a few phone calls, mostly it was by email that I learned of her serious condition. She left before I could return home.

Perhaps it was a blessing of sorts not to have to see her so frail and thin, so very sick. I feel very lucky that my cat care person did such a great job.

So hard to be back home without that bouncy little bundle of love, she would perch on my shoulder and refuse to switch to the usual lap sitting. I think she thought she was part parrot!

Miss her miss her miss her.

Lost another dear cat friend in 2008, Molly Malone, and then Mr X in 2009. Very hard to have to go through this again.

Jan

[JanEeee]

Today the sadness wraps me in a deep dark cloud. I want to tell you, "Please please come back, please please say you will be here, around the corner, under the bed, just hiding, tucked away napping, still within my reach." I do not want to accept your passing, I do not want to feel the pain of losing you, I want your happy face and joyful purr to greet me, as they did not so long ago.

The whys have no answer and I am left talking my way through your memories with Tedly and Zouzou, trying to fly through my hurt and loss quickly without touching too deeply, without feeling the agony that is part of loving so much and losing so much.

The years have been bringing a bit too many good-byes, Mom in 2006, Molly Malone in 2008, Mr X in 2009 and now you. It all piles up and echoes around the same vast empty cavern. I feel hollow and crippled by the absence of your sweet beauty.

Today is full of missing you.

Jan