Rafer, Hole in my heart Options

[Idajean]

Rafer was born on St. Patty Day 2003 and died on March 23 2010. He was a majestic handsom Doberman. His name is Celtic meaning Rich and prosperous. I loved this dog more than any other, whether this was right or wrong it was what it was. I can't believe I will never feel his head on my lap again or look into his trusting eyes. He was taken much to early. Two weeks ago he had his yearly checkup and was pronounced healthy. After he was given all his shots we returned home and within hours he started to have problems breathing. When i took him to the vets x-rays and an EKG showed he had cardiomyopathy. What a shock. I was told with medications he may live for 6 months to a year. He only made it two weeks. We were back at the vets every 3rd day or so as he would fill up with fluid and unable to breath again. He stopped eating and with all the medications he was taking it became so futile. Last night after a day of not breathing well, increased lasix and no eating I went back to vets. His gums were white, is heart was in such a severe arrhytmia that he suggested putting him to sleep. I was just so devasted. I lay on the floor at the vets with him as they gave him the injection. I just kept telling him how much I loved him and what a wonderful boy he was, until he quietly crossed over the bridge. I am 67 and know that the pain I feel will be with me until my end. I will hold him in my heat forever.

[Debboop]

Hi Idajean,

I am so sorry for your loss and really can understand how you are feeling, I lost my beloved Rufus 18/03/10 and the pain has been unbearable. I think only other dog lovers can understand the pain your going through. I had been to the vets two days before thinking it was his time but the vet said to try painkillers, he had been on walk etc and I can`t believe that 2 days later I too was lay on the vets floor with him telling him how much I loved him whilst they put him to sleep. You go through all kinds of emotions.
I collected his ashes yesterday and found out that they cremated him on the 22/03/10 which was the day before my birthday. I have to say that today is the first day I haven`t cried although I am not saying I couldn`t.
Although its easy to say you have to think of the good times you had with your "baby" I just think of when I took the last look of him when I was leaving vets room so I do know how hard it is for you.
Hopefully all our babes are running around together up there in "doggie heaven" not suffering any pain, just happy about the times they had spent with us all. xx