7 Months W/o My Nissa Yesterday (23rd) Options

[Furkidlets' Mom]

I couldn't even write about this yesterday, on Nissa's 7th month anniversary, I was so shaky about it. I ended up having to bring her body out of the freezer, to have a 'visit' with me, I missed the feel and look of her so. My H came home just as I was bringing her upstairs and also got all misty-eyed as he stroked her "still so soft" fur. I just HAD to see my girl, it was killing me so much not to.

Hard as yesterday was, though, it ended up filled with blessings, too. I got a call from a dear, past friend, who helped me immensely as we talked of almost nothing BUT our passed kidlets and all things animal. This call had been strangely delayed until yesterday and it struck me that morning that this was WHY it had been delayed....it was an orchestrated gift from Nissa, so that I wouldn't have to be all alone on her anniversary! That was gift #1.

Gift #2 came from Maggie, the neighbourhood cat who's been visiting me for months now. Normally hissy/spitty out of the blue, she joined me upstairs as I was putting the bed back together and for the first time ever, jumped up on the bed to actually lie down. That was remarkable enough, but she then allowed me to lay down beside her, only about a foot away and when I did, she actually relaxed even more! So we had a 15 minute rest together. It was so unlike her that I now believe Nissa worked with what (little) she could, and 'make' Maggie give me something I really needed.

Gift #3 was what Maggie did after she got up and went outside to our yard. W/i a couple of minutes, she'd suddenly caught a birdie (yes, I know, not a 'pleasant' subject to many, but...), which felt so NORMAL and reminded me so much of my girl, the Mighty Huntress that she was, even if she didn't like birdies but rodents. But rodents aren't really out and about here yet, so again, working with what she had.....

Gift #4 came at the end of the dinner we'd gone out for (no one in the mood to cook today). There were only 2 songs I'd even been able to hear clearly in this restaurant. The first, one called "A New Day" by Colin James....the meaning to me, mainly in the ti*tle (and I love this song), and the second, even more meaningful - "I've Got You Under My Skin"....part of which I used to sing to both Nissa and Sabin on occasion. Since both of them have sent me messages before through song, I just knew that these two were just that....their closeness to me.

I took such great comfort in these 'coincidences' that aren't merely that....too many new and unusual things all in one day, to be nothing but coincidence. Orchestrated timing, hearts opening, working through another feline, personal songs.....no, I'm convinced this was my girl, my darling Nis', taking good care of her Mommy, just as she always did. I lit the usual candles for her in the evening, plus an extra, floating candle in honour of both her anniversary and Moose's (Lori) and told her how grateful I was for her wonderful gifts and for sticking close to me throughout the whole day. I still miss my Nis' like all get-out, but she did her very best to get me through this painful day, and my heart opens in wonder and so much big, pink, fuzzy love for my Gal-Pal, the light of my life, everything she was, still is and ever will be....my Nissakins.

I love you and miss you, Sweetie-Pie, more than ever!! My little Hun-Bun, the most lovingest girl in the whole Universe!!

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[AlleysMama]

FK's mom

I just love the kissy pictures you have of you and Nissa. Alley would have thought I would crazy if I had tried to get kisses from her!

I know how hard yesterday was for you, and for Lori, with these sorrowful anniversaries. I did light a candle last night for you both. I just have to say that I think Nissa truly did do her best to comfort you yesterday. You and I both know how the "caring friends" have been few and far between and for you to get a call from someone yesterday, someone who was caring and let you talk about how you felt, well, I think Nissa definitely had her little grey paw in that.

Same with that rascal Maggie, deciding to do things she doesn't normally do, but things that Nissa DID do, I would bet anything she had some encouragement from your girl to act that way.

I know these things are not the dream visits, or the actual visions or communications that you are wanting, but it does show that your girl is still there, and does worry about you and feel the need to comfort you. I had mentioned in another post that maybe the reason Alley had been keeping herself scarce is because all her time and energy is taken up by planning and arranging for my new kitty in the somewhat near future. Maybe Nissa has been busy with this sort of planning as well, and is sending you the only subtle signs she is able to pass on right now.

She is with you, even if it doesn't always seem to be so.