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> Alley's Story (long), "Little Tyrant"
AlleysMama
post Dec 16 2006, 11:35 AM
Post #1





Group: Pet Lovers
Posts: 625
Joined: 13-December 06
From: Virginia
Member No.: 2,356



I got Alley on May 28, 1997 for my birthday. She was a tiny little fuzzball, probably not old enough really to leave her mama, but the people wanted to get rid of them. She was a little ball of black fluff, with one white whisker.

It was obvious from the start that she was a little queen, or more accurately, a little tyrant. She refused to sleep anywhere but burrowed up under my neck as I lay on my side in bed. She did not want to be disturbed while she was sleeping either. It was ok to pet her, when She wanted it, but never, when she was sleeping. Actually, she was a lot like her mama from the start. Not wanting to be bothered, affection only on her terms.

When she was only about 2 months old, she was running around the living room playing, and jumped at a fishing pole propped in the corner. All of a sudden she went tearing across the room, dragging the pole behind her and yowling. I grabbed her and picked her up and that's when I realized the hook had gone all the way through the flesh between her front toes. The vet was opening in an hour, so I sat and held her little body still for an hour, making sure she didn't move and hurt herself any worse. They took her in and despite her small size, were able to put her out and remove the hook. When I picked her up after work, she seemed so frail and tiny, still half "drunk" acting from the anesthesia. I knew then, she was going to be work!

She grew into a fat little cat. She was always small boned and delicate seeming, but had a very long body and a fat little belly that never went away. I remember taking her into the vet to be spayed when she was about a year old and they asked if she was pregnant already, then looked at her and said "nope, she's just really fat!". But boy, could she run, and run fast! She was always an indoor/outdoor cat, and I, her mere door opening slave, day and night. She would sit beside my bed and meow until I woke up and let her out. Then when she wanted back in, she would stand up on her hind legs, and scratch the door just like a dog!

I had Alley in my life for 8 wonderful years. She was my constant companion, sleeping in my bed each night. A few years ago, due to financial reasons, me and my son, and Alley moved back into my mom's house. My mom had a tought tomcat, and a little yorkie dog that weighed about 3 1/2 pounds. Alley was scared and timid for a few days because of the trauma of the move, but that didn't last long and she quickly let everyone know who was boss. When the tomcat came around, she just looked at him like he was nobody and not worth her time. I'll never forget the first, and last time, the little yorkie tried to nip at her tail (when she was looking away, of course!). She turned around and fluffed up her long fur and hissed at him. She weighed about 13 pounds at the time and had her winter fur, so to the tiny dog, a quarter her size, she seemed like a huge monster. He ran crying off and always tiptoed around her after that! It was soooooo hilarious.

She didn't learn to catch a mouse until she was almost 5 years old! She would get them for a second, then they would always get loose. She would sit there watching where she last saw it for hours, waiting for it to come back out! I started to think she was never going to catch on. Until one day, she figured it out. Boy, did she ever! She brought me a baby chipmunk the first time. After that, everything she caught, she would bring in thru the cat flap and lay on the rug next to my bed, to show me what a good girl she was. I always praised her and told her what a good smart girl she was (even though it was gross!).

Last year, I got the chance to move from Oklahoma to Virginia with my boyfriend, to start a new life, new job, etc. My son was a senior in high school and didn't want to leave, so he stayed with my mom. The apt. my boyfriend had does not allow pets, so the decision was made to leave Alley there, at the home she was familiar with for a while. I had hoped that when the lease was up here, I would be able to bring her out here. I flew home this past May for my son's graduation and was able to spend a few days with ALley then. i was afriad she wouldn't remember me, but the minute I called her she came running and sat in my lap for a solid hour purring and loving. That night, she was in bed waiting to snuggle with me while I slept. I have to admit, leaving her was much harder than saying goodbye to my parents and my son. I worried about her so much and sent her little treats once in a while.

Two weeks ago now, I found out she was sick. They said she was losing a lot of weight and acting a bit sluggish. She was still eating and catching mice so we didn't think it was serious and I had them make her a vet appt. They took her in last Thursday, the 7th of Dec. That afternoon, I got the call. Alley had Cytauxzoonosis, a semi-rare blood parasite, that was 95% fatal, and that usually, the cat is dead within 2 weeks of symptoms starting. Alley was down to 5 1/2 pounds and her red blood count was 7 out of 30 something. Even with a blood transfusion, they felt she was too weak to even survive an attempt at treatment, and that after all that, she was going to die anyways. There is no vaccine and no effective treatment for this disease. The few cats who do survive it, seem to be just out of luck and will always carry it.

I was in shock and couldn't believe she was really going to die. I asked my mom to take her home for a few days, and to wait until she "got bad" before taking her back to be euthanized. I just couldn't part with her that soon. Until, the next day, I did some online research. I found 2 different articles that described what a "horrible and painful death" this was for a cat. I freaked out. NO WAY was I going to let my baby girl suffer like that. I asked them to take her in the next day, and at 10:00 Saturday, December 9th, my baby was gone. It was the hardest decisions I ever made, but it was not nearly as terrifying as the thought of my little tyrant suffering such pain. I had to prevent that, no matter what.

The day I found out, I overnighted her some treats that she loved and hope she knew they were from me. I called the morning before they took her in and told her how much mama loved her and how sorry I was that I let this happen to her.

Now you know, the guilt I feel. IF only I'd brought her here, tried to hide her from the landlord, she wouldn't have been outside and got the disease. She would be here with me alive and well. So its my fault my baby is gone. I left her there. I left her there to die. I should have tried harder to get her here, I should have done something. I will never forgive myself for killing my baby girl. My heart is broken and its all my fault. I miss her so much and the worst part, is knowing I could have prevented it somehow. And the fact that, before she died, all I could do was hear her little meow over the phone. I didn't get to hold her and touch her soft fur.

She is buried in the yard at my mom's, under a flower bush she always liked to sleep under.

I miss her so much. I'm so sorry Alley. I love you so much. Please forgive me for leaving you.

It has been exactly one week today. I hope she's not scared and lost, like I am.

Paula








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Read Alley's Story

May 1, 1997 to December 9, 2006 - Always in My Heart
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Simba's Daddy
post Dec 16 2006, 12:45 PM
Post #2





Group: Pet Lovers
Posts: 294
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From: Michigan
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Thank you for sharing you and Alley's story with us. She sounds like she was a great companion and friend. I think feeling guilty is part of the grieving process. I know it was for me... But you have to realize that you did everything you could to make sure Alley had the best life possible and that she was very happy. It's not your fault she got sick.

I hear to many stories about people that move and can't take their pets with them so they abandon them or dump them off somewhere. With you, Alley did not get that. It sounds like your mom loved her too. She got the help she needed to make sure she didn't suffer.

I lived with "Simba I" in an apartment that didn't allow pets. It was where I was living at the time I got him. I will tell you it was not pleasant. The landlord (who also lived on the property) was constantly harrassing me and threatening me with eviction. I couldn't come or go without him spotting me out of his window and running out of his apartment screaming at me like a mad man telling me to get rid of the cat... in front of all my neighbors and everything. One time I came home from work early and caught him trying to get into my apartment to steal Simba from me. Who knows what that wacko would have done with my baby if I didn't come home early that day.

Alley knows that the treats were from you and she knows that you loved her very much.


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jazmin
post Dec 16 2006, 08:43 PM
Post #3





Group: Pet Lovers
Posts: 58
Joined: 12-November 06
From: vancouver bc canada
Member No.: 2,268



Thank you for sharing her story with us. It was a pleasure to read, she did sound like quite a little queen. Try not to blame yourself, it's not your fault. It is life and life is cruel sometimes but we can't stop it. Just know that Alley is free now with no pain and only carries the love she had with her.

Here's sending you peace and love, Jazmin
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Moose Mom
post Dec 18 2006, 01:34 PM
Post #4





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Member No.: 2,225



Paula

Thanks so much for sharing Alley's story with us! I love it when my babies 'share' the kill with me. It is gross, no doubt! I always tell them what mighty hunters they are! I'm so sorry you couldn't be with her at the end. She knows you love her.

Love
Lori


--------------------
Lori
For some of my Bridge kids.
Butch 1974-1996
Alex 1981-1996
Moose 1996-2006
Mommy loves and misses you guys. She remember's all of you, even though it's too many to name each one. I can't wait to see you again.
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xrayspex
post Dec 18 2006, 11:13 PM
Post #5





Group: Pet Lovers
Posts: 313
Joined: 11-November 06
From: London, Ontario, Canada
Member No.: 2,266



Paula...thank you for sharing your story. I sensed a great amount of guilt near the end of it though. It was Lori who sensed out my guilt after posts in another part of this forum. Please don't stay there. I realized quickly it is a very cruel and unhealthy place to be emotionally. Alley felt the love. It radiates from you. We can all feel it here reading your story. You have the distinction of being a Keeper of one of Gods great creatures. Now it is his turn to keep the spirit of that creature...free as did you


--------------------
CLICK ON ME...YOU JUST MIGHT SMILE
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AlleysMama
post Dec 19 2006, 09:10 AM
Post #6





Group: Pet Lovers
Posts: 625
Joined: 13-December 06
From: Virginia
Member No.: 2,356



I do feel guilt. Because I left her. Because I wasn't there for her, or with her, at the end. I know it would have been too risky to try to hide her from the landlord but I should have tried something. Maybe I should have had the vet try the treatments. He said it wouldn't help. He said she was too weak. He said it might even hurt her more. That made the decision for me. I didn't want her to suffer. She wouldn't have understood that they were trying to help her, she would only have known it hurt. I couldn't do that to my baby.

I just miss her so much.


--------------------
Read Alley's Story

May 1, 1997 to December 9, 2006 - Always in My Heart
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vizsla-angel
post Jan 3 2007, 04:45 PM
Post #7





Group: Pet Lovers
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Joined: 1-January 07
From: Wisconsin
Member No.: 2,400



Thank you for sharing her story. What a beautiful girl!
And thanks for making me laugh too. What is it with kittens and fishing poles anyway? I had a kitten put a hook with a green ball at the end right through the middle of his tounge. Looked like he got a piercing.
When you talked about Alley getting mixed up with a fishing pole, I remembered Mic Mac doing that and laughed through my tears over Copper.
Thank you!


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Help a "throw away" ~ adopt a gun-shy hunting dog or retired greyhound.
www.petfinder.com
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AlleysMama
post Jan 3 2007, 06:18 PM
Post #8





Group: Pet Lovers
Posts: 625
Joined: 13-December 06
From: Virginia
Member No.: 2,356



Thank you for reading her story. I will remember the fishing hook "incident" for the rest of my life! Funny thing is, she was never a very playful kitten and definitely not a playful cat later in life (it was beneath her dignity to run around acting silly and chasing "things"... unless of course she got on the catnip, lol, then she was a fiend, you could just see the crazed look in her eyes! It was wonderful.) Perhaps that incident taught her a hard lesson about being too playful!

It is soon coming up on a month since her passing and it feels like it was just this morning that I heard her last meow. I mis sher so much.


--------------------
Read Alley's Story

May 1, 1997 to December 9, 2006 - Always in My Heart
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AngelCareOne
post Nov 5 2008, 10:54 PM
Post #9





Group: Pet Lovers
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From: Florida
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In Loving Memory and Tribute to Alley

May 1, 1997 to December 9, 2006










Her Loving Flame Burns Brightly for All Eternity!!!
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AlleysMama
post Nov 6 2008, 09:25 AM
Post #10





Group: Pet Lovers
Posts: 625
Joined: 13-December 06
From: Virginia
Member No.: 2,356



Reading back over this thread brings it all back. It will soon be 2 years but feels like it was just yesterday.


I miss you girl. Always.


--------------------
Read Alley's Story

May 1, 1997 to December 9, 2006 - Always in My Heart
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AngelCareOne
post Nov 6 2008, 09:59 AM
Post #11





Group: Pet Lovers
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From: Florida
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Dearest Paula, your precious baby Alley is only a breath away ... Right there with you every single moment. Paula, a breath away is not far at all to where Alley is. That's a fact, Jack. She loves you so much!!! And Alley is right there with you at this very moment and will never, ever leave you. She's there, just like I said and only a breath away. Please turn up your volume and click on your most cherished beloved baby girl Alley then you will know that all I say is so! Hugs!!




"To Where You Are"


Who can say for certain maybe you're still here. I feel you all around me. Your memory's so clear. Deep in the stillness, I can hear you speak. You're still an inspiration. Can it be? That you are my Forever Love. And you are watching over me from up above!

Fly me up to where you are beyond the distant star. I wish upon tonight to see you smile! If only for a while to know you're there. A breath away's not far to where you are.

Are you gently sleeping here inside my dream? And isn't faith believing all power can't be seen. As my heart holds you just one beat away, I cherish all you gave me everyday!

'Cause you are my Forever Love watching me from up above. And I believe that Angels breathe and that love will live on and never leave!

Fly me up to where you are, beyond the distant star! I wish upon tonight to see you smile. If only for a while to know you're there. A breath away's not far to where you are!

I know you're there! A breath away's not far to where you are!




Tons of Comforting Hugs and Much Love to You and Your Fur Child Alley!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox
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AlleysMama
post Nov 6 2008, 02:17 PM
Post #12





Group: Pet Lovers
Posts: 625
Joined: 13-December 06
From: Virginia
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I don't have speakers at work, but he words are beautiful Dottie. I will listen to it when I get home tonight. Thank you so much for your words of comfort.



Paula


--------------------
Read Alley's Story

May 1, 1997 to December 9, 2006 - Always in My Heart
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AngelCareOne
post Nov 6 2008, 03:23 PM
Post #13





Group: Pet Lovers
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From: Florida
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{{{{{Paula}}}}} You are very welcome. Hey, I and so many others have been there and I for one am there right now so I sure want to help you, Dear One. I see your user name at this time as being online here at LS. Perhaps you're at home? Even if you're not at home, I do have many wonderful videos, images, poems and more which I'd love to share in much hope that they would bring you at least some small comfort.

Tight Comforting Hugs!!! wub.gif wub.gif wub.gif

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox
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LoveThem
post Nov 6 2008, 03:46 PM
Post #14





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Paula

Alley is so beautiful. Looking at the pictures Dottie just put here in frames...I thought of my Little Guy and his twin brother, Keeper. Alley and they just look so very much alike.

I have marked my calendar for December 9th and will be thinking of you and that beautiful girl and sending hugs to both of you.

Judy


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LITTLE GUY - May 28, 1991 - Sept 10, 2007 - Always in my Heart.
His story: Section D&D: How do I stop crying? and also... My Boy is Gone Forever.

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AngelCareOne
post Nov 8 2008, 09:12 PM
Post #15





Group: Pet Lovers
Posts: 1,827
Joined: 16-June 08
From: Florida
Member No.: 4,797



Dearest Paula, I know your sweet Alley kitty's anniversary is nearing and you're most likely feeling gosh darned awful. So, I found something I hope and pray will put a smile on your face for even just a moment. I'm not going to put an image here for you to click because that would give it away. Yes, it's a video so when you get home and have speakers, please turn up your volume. Let me begin by saying ...

"I want you to want me!
I need you to need me!
I'd love you to love me!"

Gee, Paula. I wonder what ever possessed me to type in those song lyrics. unsure.gif Well, you'll understand why I chose to say that quote after you see this awesome video. It truly is amazing and astounding! Cute as all get out, too!

I'll give you a one word clue: Imprinting. wink.gif

That's all ya get so please turn up your volume, click below and do watch all the way to the end cuz it just gets better and better. I just know you'll enjoy it oodles, Hon. So, wait until you get home and then click on the words below ...




Well, Paula? Was that a "Moment of Ahhh" or what?! Ahhhhh!!! wub.gif wub.gif wub.gif

I hope you're doing well, my Friend.

You know you and your Alley fur baby are in my thoughts and prayers.

Big Comforting Hugs!!! wub.gif wub.gif wub.gif

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox
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