I Can't Really Believe He's Actually Gone!, My boy passed away 4 days ago Options

[jazmin]

I just can't believe it? I just can't. How is it that he's really gone? That I won't be able to give him belly rubs, or put my hand under his little head (he always loved that sometimes I wold just let him sleep like that). He had the most amazing personality, so intellegent and regal, so loving and so so sweet. How is it that I don't get to see him anymore.

I come home and want ot call his name, I go into my bedroom and think I will see him there on the bed. My best friend is know gone, my baby, I know they say it will get easier but how does it he was in my life since I was 11 years old I'm now 26, that's most of my life at this point.

I seem to cry at any little thing, watching **, or shows that I use to distract myself, death is always there i seem to see it screaming at me. I put a good face on to friends as I dont 'want them to see just how heartbroken I really am. I was in an almost fatal car accident last year and have grown very good at putting on a face. I want people around me to have fun, have a good time, I try and laugh, it's so hard. There will never be another Zack as long as I live, I just can't believe he's gone.

xxJaz

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[Schtoobing'sMom]

Jazmin,

I'm so sorry to hear you've been sick. I hope you're feeling better. I think Zack was trying to comfort you, because he knows you've been sick. He's always with you. I know what you mean about seeing your baby everywhere. I keep thinking that I see Schtoobing cruising by on his way to the food bowl. Or I'll feel the bed move, like when Schtoob would jump up, and I think- oh good- Schtoob is coming to snuggle with me. *sighh*

I know this has been a really hard holiday season for you, and so many others of us here on this site. I wish I could make you all feel better, but all I can say is- I know how you feel, and you are not alone. Take care of yourself.

Diane