Does Anyone Else Not Want To Vacuum? Options

[tammy]

I'ts been 5 days since my cat Diapey died. My apartment is a total mess. But I don't want to vacuum because it will suck up her cat hair and I feel like it will be "erasing" her from ever being here. And I don't want to wash the blanket on top of my bed because I think that too will be wiping her away. If I wash the blanket and vacuum, what's left here of her?! Does anyone else feel like that?

I'm supposed to go on vacation with friends a week from tomorrow and I just don't think I'll be up for it. Should I make myself go? Any recommendations? If I don't go, how do I explain this to my friends without sounding like a crazy person?

And it really sucks to to wake up in the morning, and as soon as I open my eyes, my heart just sinks.
I don't even have to think about her; my heart is so heavy.

Thanks for listening again. And I am sorry to all those who have lost their pets too.
-Tammy

[Julie]

Tammy, I know exactly what you are talking about. My kitty Devon died one month ago on Saturday (August 20). I am still so devestated by her loss I really don't know what to do. I go through the motions of living. It took me over 2 weeks to empty her food and water bowls and to even dispose of her litter box. I didn't wash my sheets for 3 weeks because I couldn't stand the thought that she would no longer be on my bed.
I buried her in the blanket she liked to sleep on (sometimes I am sorry about that because I really would love to have it), but I have not removed the throw on the back of the loveseat where she loved to lay. You can still see the indentation in the pillow. There is hair on the throw and I find myself touching it every day. Also, she was put to sleep on July 20. I was with her and held her. The shirt I had on is covered in her hair. I will NEVER wash this shirt.
I really don't know how long it will take to get through this. She was my only pet and my children are grown so I am alone. Maybe that is making it harder.
Just know, Tammy, that we all know how you are feeling and you are in my thoughts. This site has been my saviour. I honestly don't think I could have gotten through as well as I have if I was not on here every day.
Love,
Julie