My Sweet Sadie, I lost my dog today Options

[Del]

Hello to all,
I was glad to find this site. I really need to share my thoughts with people who understand. This morning I said goodbye to my beloved friend, my dog Sadie. She was a Dalmatian and would have been 14 on the 26th of this month. I am so sad. Sadie was my first dog who was my very own. She was my baby girl.

Over the last 2 years she was beginning to show her age, but she still enjoyed life and even though she had days when all she did was lie around, she played and ran around quite a bit, especially for a Dal of that age....until last night when she took a fall down some steps. I knew by morning that it was time for her to go. And as hard as it was for me, I called the vet and scheduled the appointment.

At 12:00 PM on April 9th, 2005, my sweet Sadie Ann took her last breath. I was with her, along with two of my dear friends who also loved her. Sadie has the best vet in the world. He's been with her since she was a pup and it was so comforting knowing that he was going to help her pass on. I know this was the best thing for her, but it's so hard. I am lucky to have another wonderful Dalmatian named Jake who is also my baby boy and a lot of supportive friends who understand, but there's something about writing down your thoughts when something like this happens.

I've cried all day....and I mean...allllll day long. I am finally at a point where the tears are not constant. I know Sadie is in a better place, where she can run and play as she did when she was young and healthy. And I know that her pain is now mine, which is okay because she deserves to be free. I had a weird sense of relief when she finally left, although I felt like I almost wasn't going to be able to stand it because it hurt so much.

I guess I just really needed to write about her and how I'm hurting so much. I am missing her already and know that this will not be an easy process. It's just so strange knowing that she won't be back here....that I cannot ever touch her again. Jake knows something is going on. I'm not sure if he's reacting to my emotions or if he realizes she's not coming back. He's been really quiet today and kind of sullen. Sadie was so bossy with him and he always competed for my attention. She told him when he could eat and even scolded if she thought he was bad. So, I'm not so sure he's really missing her.

Thank you for letting me tell my story. I feel better just writing this all down. I'd appreciate any helpful advice on how to get through this. I'm kind of concerned about going to work on Monday. I'm an elementary teacher and hate the thought of telling the kids. The love hearing dog stories....and I've been telling them for years. Sadie is known by a lot of kids. I know I cannot tell them right away...it's just too fresh.

I wish you all the best and hope that each day gives you less pain.

Carol

[Del]

Dear friends,
Words cannot express how much your responses mean to me. You are such dear people! I was telling a friend tonight about these boards. They fill a need for me right now....a need to be wrapped in warmth, understanding and compassion. Just reading the other posts and the repsonses, I have cried for all of you who have lost your beloved pets. I tried to post a response, but I just can't right now. Just writing the words expressing my sympathy...I don't know how to explain, but I will be ready soon. I hope you all know that you are in my thoughts and prayers as I read each post. I do understand.

I spent the day cleaning my house and taking breaks to grieve. I grieve like a child. I cry my eyes out and think of Sadie...then I go back to doing what I normally do....today it was cleaning all the messes.....then back again to grieving. I have no appetite and my eyes feel puffy and swollen.

And I miss Sadie. I feel lucky that I have friends who have called me and stopped over to see how I'm doing. I made some phone calls last night and today to tell the people who loved her most. And I cried when I told each one of them.

Last April, my neighbor lost her Golden Retriever, Buddy to cancer. He was such a precious dog. She was one of the people I called yesterday morning when I knew it was going to be Sadie's last day. She cried with me, as I cried with her last year. I still miss Buddy. She said she still goes into crying spells now and then when something reminds her of Buddy. She has two new dogs now. They're darling. Her male dog, my other neighbor's female lab and Jake all three played in my backyard today. It was a beautiful sunny day and the dogs had a great time....we did also. I think it was good for me to be outside with the dogs. Jake had an exceptionally good time. He used to hesitate to play hard when Sadie was in the yard because she didn't like him to get too wound up, even if another dog was out there. She would warn him to settle down.

I think Jake is going to grow up now that she's no longer with us. He is almost 9, but people think he's still a pup because of his youthful personality. The vet says that he plays that role in the family....he's the baby. The neighbor guy came over this evening and Jake started jumping on me to get my attention. I'm thinking that I may have to make another set of rules for him now. I hope he's not going to become really possesive of me.

Thank you all for taking the time to respond. I appreciate it so much!
I'll check in tomorrow and I hope to respond to a few posts then.
Hugs to all of you,
Carol