Hello to all,
I was glad to find this site. I really need to share my thoughts with people who understand. This morning I said goodbye to my beloved friend, my dog Sadie. She was a Dalmatian and would have been 14 on the 26th of this month. I am so sad. Sadie was my first dog who was my very own. She was my baby girl.

Over the last 2 years she was beginning to show her age, but she still enjoyed life and even though she had days when all she did was lie around, she played and ran around quite a bit, especially for a Dal of that age....until last night when she took a fall down some steps. I knew by morning that it was time for her to go. And as hard as it was for me, I called the vet and scheduled the appointment.

At 12:00 PM on April 9th, 2005, my sweet Sadie Ann took her last breath. I was with her, along with two of my dear friends who also loved her. Sadie has the best vet in the world. He's been with her since she was a pup and it was so comforting knowing that he was going to help her pass on. I know this was the best thing for her, but it's so hard. I am lucky to have another wonderful Dalmatian named Jake who is also my baby boy and a lot of supportive friends who understand, but there's something about writing down your thoughts when something like this happens.

I've cried all day....and I mean...allllll day long. I am finally at a point where the tears are not constant. I know Sadie is in a better place, where she can run and play as she did when she was young and healthy. And I know that her pain is now mine, which is okay because she deserves to be free. I had a weird sense of relief when she finally left, although I felt like I almost wasn't going to be able to stand it because it hurt so much.

I guess I just really needed to write about her and how I'm hurting so much. I am missing her already and know that this will not be an easy process. It's just so strange knowing that she won't be back here....that I cannot ever touch her again. Jake knows something is going on. I'm not sure if he's reacting to my emotions or if he realizes she's not coming back. He's been really quiet today and kind of sullen. Sadie was so bossy with him and he always competed for my attention. She told him when he could eat and even scolded if she thought he was bad. So, I'm not so sure he's really missing her.

Thank you for letting me tell my story. I feel better just writing this all down. I'd appreciate any helpful advice on how to get through this. I'm kind of concerned about going to work on Monday. I'm an elementary teacher and hate the thought of telling the kids. The love hearing dog stories....and I've been telling them for years. Sadie is known by a lot of kids. I know I cannot tell them right away...it's just too fresh.

I wish you all the best and hope that each day gives you less pain.

Carol

I'm sorry the picture of Sadie is so large. Is there a way I can make it smaller?
Carol

I am so very sorry about your little girl Sadie Ann. She is very beautiful. The pain will get a little better with time but oh my how it hurts so much. I don't believe I would have mad it through without the love and compassion of everyone here on LS. I tried to crop the picture down for you. You could go back into your post and delete the picture and just use the one I did for you.
Ann

Ann, thank you so much for cropping that picture. I deleted mine and will just use that one.
Also, thank you for the kind words. It means a lot to me. It does help when people say something that shows understanding. I guess it feels like a speck of that pain drops off. And any little bit helps. I've always cried when friends told me that they'd lost their dogs. Even though people warned me and I thought I was as prepared as possible...it was like a huge pit was left. I do expect it to get easier, but I'd like it to happen sooner than later.

I know you've lost your dear dogs, also. I am so very sorry.
Thank you, Ann.
Carol

Your Sadie is such a beautiful girl, you must miss her so very much. I hope it helped to be able to write and tell us about your beloved Sadie.
We love our babies so much that when it is time for them to go it leaves such an enormous and painful hole in our hearts that we feel will never ever heal.

It must be difficult for your dear Jake too. Although maybe he can be a support for you in your loss and you can come closer together. Were they brother and sister?

My thoughts are with you

Bless dear Sadie
with love
jilly

Your Sadie is beautiful and kind and wonderful ~ the eyes show the soul of a kind and loving animal spirit ~ My thoughts are with you in your sadness and your grief this day ~ Since my Amber left me ~ I have been burning a candle at night for all of the dear departed animal spirit friends and family members we all have lost ~ my candle ~ its the light of our love for all of our animal friends that shines through the dark ~ just as their hearts have done for us ~ I am so sorry for you loss....Kathryn

Dear Carol,

When I looked into the eyes of your sweet, beautiful Sadie I immediately understood all the love that you two had for each other. I'm so very sorry for her loss. I lost my Allie one month ago and I am doing better now but I still miss her immensely and I always will.

I know how painful this is, so please come and post here often about your dear Sadie. Tell us all about her and her life and the funny or sweet things she used to do. Everyone here is so kind and they will listen and do their best to comfort you.

What is important is that you gave Sadie 14 years of wonderful, happy life and she was so grateful to have you as a Mom. You will always live in each other's hearts until one day when you meet again in Heaven.

God bless you and your sweet Jake. He must miss her lots even if he was sometimes annoyed by his sister. God bless and keep sweet Sadie, and hold her in Your loving arms forever. Amen.

With love,
Jenny

Dear Carol,

I'm so sorry for the loss of your beautiful Sadie. What a pretty face! It's so hard dealing with the loss of a beloved pet. Time will help and coming here where everyone knows exactly how you feel.

I bet when you have the courage to tell your students about Sadie, they'll understand your sadness and try to make you feel better. It will be hard to tell them but you can do it.

Take care and good luck at school tomorrow.

Hugs,
Lynn

Carol,
I'm so sorry for your loss. Sadie was beautiful. Your story and lifestyle is so similar to mine. I lost my Jasmine 3 weeks ago tomorrow. (See my thread titled My Jazzygirl). Although mine was sudden, the feelings are the same. I also have another dog, a male of the same breed (German Shorthair) and Jasmine definitely kept him in line! Not that he needs it...he's very laid back, but still. I also am a teacher. I had actually taken a few days off to regroup. I teach high school and my kids knew how much I loved my dogs. They were very sweet when I returned and one class even gave me a card. But it's not easy in the beginning. The people here have helped me so much. I have not yet written about Jasmine's life much because I can't yet. Perhaps on the one month anniv I will. It's just been too hard. I did post a pic of her in my thread.
This site is wonderful and I know you'll find the same comfort I did in coming here.
Thinking of you...
Audrey

Dear friends,
Words cannot express how much your responses mean to me. You are such dear people! I was telling a friend tonight about these boards. They fill a need for me right now....a need to be wrapped in warmth, understanding and compassion. Just reading the other posts and the repsonses, I have cried for all of you who have lost your beloved pets. I tried to post a response, but I just can't right now. Just writing the words expressing my sympathy...I don't know how to explain, but I will be ready soon. I hope you all know that you are in my thoughts and prayers as I read each post. I do understand.

I spent the day cleaning my house and taking breaks to grieve. I grieve like a child. I cry my eyes out and think of Sadie...then I go back to doing what I normally do....today it was cleaning all the messes.....then back again to grieving. I have no appetite and my eyes feel puffy and swollen.

And I miss Sadie. I feel lucky that I have friends who have called me and stopped over to see how I'm doing. I made some phone calls last night and today to tell the people who loved her most. And I cried when I told each one of them.

Last April, my neighbor lost her Golden Retriever, Buddy to cancer. He was such a precious dog. She was one of the people I called yesterday morning when I knew it was going to be Sadie's last day. She cried with me, as I cried with her last year. I still miss Buddy. She said she still goes into crying spells now and then when something reminds her of Buddy. She has two new dogs now. They're darling. Her male dog, my other neighbor's female lab and Jake all three played in my backyard today. It was a beautiful sunny day and the dogs had a great time....we did also. I think it was good for me to be outside with the dogs. Jake had an exceptionally good time. He used to hesitate to play hard when Sadie was in the yard because she didn't like him to get too wound up, even if another dog was out there. She would warn him to settle down.

I think Jake is going to grow up now that she's no longer with us. He is almost 9, but people think he's still a pup because of his youthful personality. The vet says that he plays that role in the family....he's the baby. The neighbor guy came over this evening and Jake started jumping on me to get my attention. I'm thinking that I may have to make another set of rules for him now. I hope he's not going to become really possesive of me.

Thank you all for taking the time to respond. I appreciate it so much!
I'll check in tomorrow and I hope to respond to a few posts then.
Hugs to all of you,
Carol

Jilly,
I forgot to answer your question. Sadie and Jake were not biological brother and sister. I picked Sadie out of a litter of 12. And Jake was given to me by my vet. Some people dropped him off at the vet's after he'd been hit by a car. He was 7 months old, neutered and had all his shots. They didn't want him anymore and told the vet to do whatever with him. I had recently mentioned to the vet that I was thinking about getting another dog because I was so attached to Sadie...and if something happened to her, I'm not sure I could handle it.

It was Christmas time and I said I'd go look at him, but I didn't want another Dal...Sadie was so demanding and I didn't know if I could take two at once, living by myself. Well, when I saw him and how sweet he was, I couldn't leave him there during the holidays. So, I had another Dalmatian....who the vet said was small framed...and would weigh no more than 40 pounds. Well, Jake got bigger and bigger...he's one of the biggest Dals....at over 70 pounds. Once he weighed in at 78...he's about 73 pounds now.

Carol

Carol, You are very welcome I was glad to crop the picture for you. Just hang in there things will get better after a while although I believe all of us will always miss our babies.
Ann

Carol,

I just read about this this afternoon. Please know that my heart breaks for you. What a loving tribute though that you wrote ... it brought back memories for me of when I had to let my little man Snoops go 1.5 years ago. It took me a very long time before the tears stopped everyday and even now I cry sometimes when I think of him but more often than not now I smile remembering what a wonderful guy he was. Today at work was probably hard but the worst is over now ... now you can begin the process of healing.

A good friend told me a trick to use when the grief becomes overwhelming ... she told me to remember something Sadie did that always made you laugh ... it can be a funny thing she did or just a memory you have of her that makes you smile no matter what. When the tears come and feel like you are drowning in them ... just think about this memory. You will find that can smile through the tears and it does help.

My thoughts and prayers are with you ...

Hugs,
Beth

Thank you, Beth. I decided to take the day off work today. I woke up early this morning and knew that I just couldn't do it. Yesterday I cleaned all day...with breaks in between to cry...and I needed another day of doing nothing. Actually I felt sick all day...I guess it can be compared to what people call "a hole in your heart". A teacher I work with wrote me an email to see where I was and I told her about Sadie. I also asked her if she could tell the other teachers so I didn't have to do that tomorrow. Another teacher, who also loves her dog, called me this evening to tell me how sorry she is and to see how I was doing.

I will take your advice about thinking about something funny about Sadie when I feel like crying. I think that will help. I've done that a couple of times today and it has helped to get past going into a crying spell. Actually, I've told people about how demanding and whiney Sadie could be and that brought out a chuckle, which got me away from the crying.

Sadie was always a very demanding dog. She was a princess and could be quite trying at times, along with her sweetness.

I truly appreciate everyone's responses. I hope I can help someone else who's going throught this.
Hugs,
Carol

Carol,
I'll say it again...I think we live parallel lives! Sadie and Jasmine sound identical! I can totally relate! As much as I loved her, she was a very trying dog! She would get me mad a LOT because she would do her own thing and ignore me when I told her to do something, like come inside the house. But the anger was always gone as fast as it came. It's what made Jasmine so unique...and Sadie too. Both our breeds can be crazy like that!
I'm glad you took the day off. I think you needed it. ANd yes, it's easier when a co-worker handles that initial breaking of the news. I found it much easier when I came back.
I'm thinking of you...
Audrey

I think you just may be right, Audrey! It's strange how things happen like that.
When I woke up this morning and thought about taking the day off, I remembered your post saying that you took some days off when Jasmine passed away. That made me feel better and I decided that I had a good reason to call in.

Your description of how Jasmine could make you crazy at times....describes Sadie exactly!! A perfect example is this...I have a floor lamp next to a chair in my living room. Sadie knew that I didn't like either of the dogs walking under that lamp because it could topple over. She would walk over there, get right under that table on the lamp and look over at me, as if to say, "Look at me. What are going to do about this?" She would usually do this when I was on the phone. GRRRRRR!!
I would shake my fist at her, wave for her to get out of there and even scold her. And she would gradually get out from under it....then sometimes she would do it again and again! She was such a stinker!!

Like Jasmine, Sadie was a very unique dog. She had a mind of her own. I used to tell the kids at school (I taught my own first grade class for years) "Sadie stories". She was very popular with the kids. The kids have always loved the stories about when Sadie was a bad dog. For awhile, I thought about writing some children's stories about the dogs. I even started a couple of them, but didn't finish.

Speaking of the "Come" command...the kids always loved the story about how I would yell out the door the word "Come" in a small voice....then I would yell louder and the louder and finally I would scream "Come here you bad dog, Sadie!!!"

Audrey, you just made me feel better by bringing up those funny memories of Sadie. Thank you!!

I'm thinking of you, too!
Carol

Sadie was such a beautiful girl. She had such a kind and loving face.

I'm so sorry for your loss.
Kathleen

Believe me I know the pain. Our loved bunny was put to rest yesterday morning after an accident left her paralyzed. I was with her in her final moments and it's proving to have been the hardest thing I've done. But I have to believe she's where she needs to be, bringing peace to all the children in heaven. I picture her running in fields of lush green grass, chasing butterflies, stopping to smell the flowers and comforting the lost children taken from this world before their time. I'll send a prayer to Dora to keep an eye out for your beloved Sadie.