![]() |
![]() ![]() |
![]() |
![]()
Post
#1
|
|
![]() Group: Pet Lovers Posts: 6 Joined: 15-June 04 Member No.: 370 ![]() |
My sweet Bear, today has been worse than yesterday. At least yesterday I could cry when I needed to. Today, at work, I am fighting to stay in control. At times the pain is great, almost choking me to the point that I have to tell myself to breathe. I don’t know if I did the right things for you. I don’t know if trying to force food and water into you helped you or ended up hurting you. I can’t help but wonder if I had left you lying where you were instead of moving you to a spot more comfortable for me to try to tend to you, would the outcome have been different. I hate not knowing what made you so sick that you just wanted to give up instead of fighting to live. I would have fought to keep you alive until I took my dying breath. I can’t help but wonder if the sickness that took you and your dad will also take your babies at a point not too far down the road. My faith is shaken and I’m not sure I can ever retrieve the feelings I once had. I don’t understand how a higher power who is supposed to be kind and merciful can just take life away from beautiful, loving animals whose only desires in life were to please those who loved them. I wanted to bury you by your father, but it was not possible. I hate it that your grave is surrounded by only mesquites, but I am going to plant a weeping willow beside you so that you will have shade. You loved lying under the willow tree. Niblet misses you. I watch him walking the length of the fence looking for his dad. He knows something isn’t right, but doesn’t seem sure what it is. Baby, having gotten used to having her son in the yard with her, seems to wander a lot too. She is very old and I think she will be joining you one day in the not too far future. I just want you to know, Bear, that your family (human and doggie) loved you so much and miss you desperately.
1996 - June 12, 2004
Attached image(s)
![]() |
|
|
![]()
Post
#2
|
|
![]() Group: Moderators Posts: 845 Joined: 24-March 04 From: Maine Member No.: 274 ![]() |
I'm so sorry about the loss of Bear!
It's hard to understand why certain things happen, I know. Sometimes I've been able to look back at things and understand why I "felt" they might have happened the way they did. For instance, my beloved cat, Mariah, was only 3 1/2 years old when she died of pancreatitis in 1998. And on top of that, I know I didn't do the right things for her toward the end. I suffered a guilt so intense that even my body shut down to the point where the doctors thought I had MS---within days I had gone from being a healthy 35-year-old to losing coordination in my arms, legs, hands, and eyes. Anyway, my health did come back thanks to the support I did have in my life at that time (the #1 comfort was my love for my other cat, Little Girl). But a little over a month later, Little Girl, who was 11 at the time, was diagnosed with a serious heart defect. Looking back, I came to believe that Mariah somehow sacrificed herself because she knew my Little Girl needed me all to herself. Of course, given a choice, I would have had my Mariah back in a second!!! But I do feel that Mariah had given Little Girl the ultimate gift (Little Girl's life hadn't been easy up until around that point and she really did need me. As it turned out, I had her until March 24th of this year). ...Other things that happen in our lives we may not understand until it's our time to pass on. Bear is pure spirit now and experiencing only bliss. He knows how much you loved---and love---him. As far as he's concerned, that is all that matters---just knowing your love. And I have no doubt he knows it, because love transcends the death of the physical body. For you, it's much harder, because your soul is still here in your physical body, and you're left to deal with the grief. It takes time but I promise you that you will heal. For me in my journey, this site was the biggest miracle I could have hoped for. Please read the excellent article on this site on dealing with the guilt. Guilt does tend to be a significant part of grief. Even if we were the perfect parents (which none of us were/are because we're human), we still feel guilty about things we did do that we shouldn't have, and/or things we didn't do that we feel we should have. Please keep in touch, and write any time!! With heartfelt support and love, Kathy p.s. Bear is very handsome! ![]() -------------------- Compassion for all animals. www.earthlings.com
|
|
|
![]()
Post
#3
|
|
![]() Group: Pet Lovers Posts: 654 Joined: 8-June 04 Member No.: 363 ![]() |
I am so sorry about your loss.
I know the pain you feel. I've had my faith shaken to the very core with the unexpected death of my beloved border collie. She was only 9 - she had several more good years ahead of her I thought. She got sick. She collapsed June 3rd and struggled valiantly at the vet's until Saturday at 12:30 pm. How can a higher power take our beloved animals when they are in their prime? I don't know. We must carry on for the others though. Your bear looks very beautiful. -------------------- "My heart has joined the thousand, for my friend stopped running today."
- Watership Down, Richard Adams |
|
|
![]()
Post
#4
|
|
Group: Pet Lovers Posts: 35 Joined: 16-June 04 Member No.: 371 ![]() |
I'm so sorry about the loss of Bear. He was a very beautiful boy.
On the day my cat Solas died, the newspaper was doing an article on kids graduating. In it was a great quote that I felt Solas sent just for me. "Don't cry for what has ended, smile because it happened." -Dr. Suess I am so glad that I had 16 wonderful years with the best cat ever. I am moving forward with baby steps. I took a shower today. Got out of my pajamas. I'm not ready to give up the extra Peperidge Farm cookies yet, but I'm going to be gentle with myself. ![]() All we can do is put one foot in front of the other. Some days will be bad and some may be better. I'm just so glad that I have a place to share all these feelings. Thank you all. Ariel |
|
|
![]()
Post
#5
|
|
Group: Moderators Posts: 776 Joined: 26-February 04 From: Massachusetts, USA Member No.: 245 ![]() |
Hi!
First, your Bear was such a handsome fellow!! ![]() Is your place of work a place where people would understand, if you needed 15 minutes by yourself...to cry, to remember???? I know it is soooo hard with that lump in your throat, and not "feeling that you can let go".. I think your Bear would love a weeping willow tree -- the shade that you said he loved... Bear will ALWAYS BE WITH YOU.....he is in your heart and in your soul..... The memories you have of your special boy......They ARE YOURS TO KEEP --- ALWAYS. No one can ever take them away!!!! I love the name "Niblet".... How is he doing??? Wow, and having "Baby", Bear's mom.... Many generations... ![]() Lightning Strikes, I'm sorry that you had to find it....but, if you had to come to a "grief sight at all", I'm glad that you found your way here. God Bless you!!! You will be in my thoughts & prayers.... Love, Denise -------------------- Our Beloved Girl, Ernestine (AKA) "Ernie-Bird"
April, 1984 - February 7, 2004 ***AFFA*** Forever, you will ALWAYS live on in our hearts! DEPARTED FROM EARTH, NEVER FORGOTTEN.... Love, Mom & Dad xoxoxoxoxo ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* "He who is cruel to animals becomes hard also in his dealings with men. We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." Immanuel Kant "Think occasionally of the suffering of which you spare yourself the sight" Albert Schweitzer |
|
|
![]() ![]() |
Lo-Fi Version | Time is now: 8th July 2025 - 02:40 PM |