I'm new to this and wishing it were under different cir%%stances. On October 16th I got a call while at work that my beloved friend of 14 years, Nicki, had been injured. I listened to a story of how she had accidentally gotten out of the fence in my parent's yard while they had ran some errands. Upon their return, she was standing at the top of the driveway underneath a tree with what my mother described as a "strange look." My mother got out of the car and Nicki slowly and cautiously walked to her feet. As soon as she got there, she fell to the ground. She was bleeding from her abdomen...She had been shot by some malicious person. I almost threw up at just the though. Who would have shot my sweet, little ##er-spaniel? My heart was breaking from 150 miles away. I could barely breath, the lump in my throat was unbelievable. All I knew was I had to get to her, and fast. She was still alive and at an emergency clinic.

I made it to my family the following day and we went to visit her around 5pm. Her breathing was so labored and she looked so sad. As the doctor proceeded to tell us that they were unable to determine the extent of the injuries, he suggested that we continue conservative treatment (i.e. fluids, painkillers, and antibiotics). He said she was just too old to have any exploratory surgery. The internal injuries he suggested were probably serious as she was urinating blood and he was unable to locate her bladder on an ultrasound. Apparently, it's the easiest thing to find. The news only got worse. He stated that we would have to move Nicki to her regular vet the following morning as the clinic closes during regular hours. I was sad and scared. Would she make it through the transport?

Monday October 18th my father and I went to pick up Nicki. She was still alive but struggling to breathe and her heart rate was very slow. Every minute that I looked at her, I just cried...I knew things were not good. We got her fluids and carefully carried her bandaged body out to the car. It was too hard on me to sit and watch her struggle, so I decided to drive to the vet while my father sat by her side. She was shivering and desperately trying to breathe. Every red light seemed to last an eternity. We finally arrived and took her in to the doctor. The decision was to continue conservative treatment. As my father and the doctor spoke, I broke down watching my baby laying practically lifeless on the table. I had to leave and sit in the car for a few minutes. I returned to say my goodbye, praying to God that he would spare her life. I bent down and she kissed my face. As they carried her to the kennel...I swear she looked at me as if saying "Goodbye. I'm letting go." The doctor said that they would call around noon with an update on her progress, which they did. She had no change. At 2pm the phone rang again, but this time with words I will never forget. "I got some bad news. Nicki has passed away. She could not hold on any longer." The pain and rage was nothing like anything I've experienced in my life. I had lost my baby, to what? Some heartless individual. She shouldn't have had to go that way. I mourn everyday. I know God gave her the strength to hold on so I could see her one last time. I will always love her for the sweet, intelligent friend she was and will always be.

I will never begin to understand why anyone would want to deliberately harm a precious, beloved animal. That really makes me sick to my stomach. I am so sorry for your loss, and I know what you are feeling. It may seem very unfair and devastating under the cir%%stances that your darling friend Nicki was taken from you so tragically and suddenly, but I believe she is once again healthy and strong, and is content, knowing that one day, she will get to kiss the face of her beloved friend again.
Wishing you the best,
Summer

I wanted to try and add a pic of my Nicki. Hopefully it will work.

Aww... she's beautiful, and looks like such a sweetheart! I can only imagine how special she was to you. I will say an extra prayer for you both, as I really should be heading off to bed
Take care,
Summer

Summer- Thank you for your comforting thoughts. It's sure nice to know that others understand the heartbreak a pet owner goes through when dealing with such a loss. Thank you for the prayers. Know I will be sending them up for you as well.

Steph

I feel so bad for your loss. I will never understand why anyone would want to hurt such a sweet animal. I feel sorry for people who do not understand that they are hurting a member of someones family. I lost my Niki in April, and i find comfort in knowing she is no longer in pain but this is still very new for you and you are in my prayers.

Oh Dear Stephee, I am SO, SO sorry!!!
I could barely read through your entire post once I discovered someone had hurt your Nickie. It makes me so mad that there are people who would hurt an innocent animal

I know the pain must be stabbing for you right now, but please know that your precious Nickie is now feeling young and pain free again. She is in a place where no one can ever hurt her again.

Oh my gosh, I am just crying at this! I just can't imagine what you are going through. I only know that I feel your pain too. I will pray for you and your family.

Cheri

Oh gosh, I am so, so sorry. That just kills my soul, and it makes me so angry and so very sad. I don't know how in the world anyone could do something to hurt a precious little innocent animal. I hope that the penalties for animal cruelty will get stronger and stronger. You are in my prayers.
Love,
Marcia
P.S. I am assuming you have no idea who did that, but I would report it to the police anyway if you haven't already.

Dear Stephee,

I am so very sorry for your loss. Nicki was a beautful dog. Nicki is now free of pain. It makes me sick to think about how sick people are in the head. Remember Nicki still loves you and is with you in spirit. My prayers are with you and your family.

Vicki

Dear Stephee ~ I am so terribly sorry to hear of your loss, and to hear that Nicki was taken from you in such a sudden, sad, and shocking way! She was such a beautiful girl; I am so sorry for the sadness, loss and grief that you are certainly feeling. I cried and cried when I read the message that you posted! What a horrible person to have shot your baby girl! I am almost as sad that there are such terrible people in this world (as I am about Nicki's death). You and your family are in my prayers. Love, Stephie

I am so sorry for your loss, Stephee. There are some truly sick people in the world and it makes it even tougher for you because there is anger as well as grief. You are in my thoughts.

Dee Dee

Dear Stephee,

I'm so awfully sorry about your loss of Nicki and the awful pain you are going through right now. In February of this year my 19 year old son phoned me on his cell from a field where he was walking our golden retriever Oscar. He was crying as he told me that the dog was hit by a snowmobiler who refused to slow down or change direction. Oscar was obediently sitting 10 feet from my son waiting till the machine past. The driver slowed down momentarily and looked back, then sped off without checking on the dog or my son. Oscar had multiple compound fractures of his hind leg. We dragged him bleeding on my son's jacket about one quarter mile through deep snow and then raced him off to the vet. About $2,000.00 later and three months of very painful convalescing, Oscar started to live again but he never regained use of his hind leg. He learned to adapt on land and water and we spent a precious summer with him at the lake. One month ago we had to put him down due to severe and advanced blastomycosis. He was only two and a half years old.
Trust me Stephee, I feel your pain. I still cry, it hurts so much. But you will have to pick up the pieces and move on too. We are in the process right now of adopting a 5 year old golden named Murphy. The energy we had for Oscar will now be given to another and there is a great deal of healing in that. Oscar knew we loved him and I know he would approve. So until we meet again at the rainbow bridge, in honor of Oscar we will love another dog who needs a good home. I'm thinking of you Steph. Be strong, cry as much as you need. Nicki loves you and knows you love her. For every door that closes another will open. Keep your eyes and ears peeled.

Ken

I know I have not posted a reply to all your kind words. It is still hard and I cry often. I know I will see Nicki again and for that I am so grateful. I want to thank all of you who have written such wonderful and encouraging things...even if they do make me cry. I cannot express how much it means to me. Thank you.

Stephee

Hi Stephee,

It's heartbreaking to learn how you lost your beloved Nicki. It's difficult enough to lose a pet to illness or just old age, but to know you lost her much too early due to the evil actions of a heartless monster makes your loss even more difficult to bare.

Your little Nicki was beautiful and she was so brave to hang on long enough for you to be able to say goodbye. Find comfort in knowing that she left this world knowing how much she was loved. I know she had a great life with you and it's good to know the two of you had such a special relationship.

I'm so sorry you are having to go through this almost unbearable pain. I understand and share your pain and I'll keep you in my thoughts.

__Jim

I'M SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT THE HEATBREAKING ORDEAL YOU HAVE HAD TO GO THROUGH. SO MANY CRUEL HATING PEOPLE OUT THERE IT MAKES ME SICK TO MY STOMACH. DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHO DID THIS? I WANT YOU TO KNOW MY HEART GOES OUT TO YOU, I'M SO SORRY YOU HAD TO LOSE YOUR BABY THIS WAY. I LOST MY BOY IN A TRAMATIC WAY, IT HAS MADE IT EVEN MORE DIFFICULT. PETS IN HEAVEN, I'M CONVINCED, WHY WOULD'NT OUR FATHER RESTORE THESE THINGS FOR US? MY HOPE IS THAT WHEN IT IS OUR TIME THAT WE WILL BE SURROUNDED BY ALL THE THINGS WE HAVE LOST AND GRIEVED OVER, WE ARE THE CARETAKERS OF GOD'S PRECIOUS ANIMALS, I HAVE FAITH HE WILL SEE US THROUGH. PAMELA MOOSE'S MOM

Oh, my God, Stephee.

My name is Jan - I lost my lab baby, Phoenix, back in April and I found this wonderful site. I don't come here often - NOT because I don't care about everyone's babies and their pain - I think I care too much.

I am literally crying right now about Nicki - and I'm in rage at whatever bastard shot her. I do consider myself a Christian - but to be completely honest, I care so much more about animals than I do people. I can't help it - it's how I am. I am torn up about Nicki and I am so sorry you have lost her.

There's not a doubt in my mind that Nicki is happy now. She's in a much better place than we are! I think Nicki's story is hitting me so hard because the first of our furbabies we had to put to sleep due to old age was our schnauzer, Spike. We had the joy of having him for 7 years - he was probably 17 or 18 when he died. He started to have heart failure but the vet took an x-ray to rule out anything else and he said to us "Did you know he has a BB pellet in his abdomen?". We had no idea. We had to put Spike to sleep that day (January 4, 1999) and whenever I think of someone shooting him, I still go into a blind rage.

Sweetie, I am so damn sorry. (I'm also sorry for my language but I'm THAT angry). I hope it helps you to know that you are NOT alone in your grief. We grieve with you.

I'm sending you hugs.

Love,

Jan (Phoenix's mom)

P.S. We also had a ##er spaniel, Duke, that was born on October 6, 1985 - I got him in my arms when he was 8 weeks old, and he did not leave my arms until August 22, 2002.

(We used to be a foster home - and now have 6 furbabies of our own left).

Stephee,
I am so sorry for your loss of your beautiful little girl. It no doubt is terrible to deal with a death much less that someone would murder your Nicki. My heart breaks for you that someone could do harm to your baby. I feel so angry that people who call themselves human beings could do such things to fur babies that are so helpless and the most loving things upon the face of the earth. I am so glad that she held on until you got there to show her your love one last time. My heart breaks at the unfairness of it all to you and your precious baby.
Ann