Hello, everybody. I'm not quite sure how to begin this post... I used to think people who were upset by the death of their beloved pet were silly and that it was impossible to love an animal as you would love your best friend. That was until I moved in with my husband and met his (our) wonderful dog, Serenity (whom the kids called Reeree.)Then I realized that those people weren't silly at all, though they're covered in fur and walk on 4 legs instead of 2... that animals are better friends than humans more often than not.

We lost our wonderful furbaby yesterday in one of the most violent, unimaginable ways ever. Our neighbors 2 German Shepherds got out of his yard and entered our fence and killed our furbaby. Then they drug her body into the middle of our neighbors drive. We didn't find out until our neighbor brought her body to us wrapped in a blanket. My husband and I refused to see what had been the end of our loving Serenity. We dug a place by our tree and burried her today and told our 3 children what happened to their playmate. Our neighbor had his dogs put down last night so that they wouldn't threaten another living thing (but it still doesn't make us feel any better for the loss of our best friend.)

I just don't know how to go about my daily chores without being bombarded with memories of how she would follow me while I went about my day. Offering me a sympathetic ear when I was bothered by something. Over flowing with joy when I would play with her or the love in her face when we would sit together on our porch while she had her evening treat and all the attention from our family.

How do you "move on" after the loss of such a dear furbaby who's been part of the family for so long and been with you through so much? I'm not sure it will ever stop hurting but I do know we'll forever miss Serenity and that no other animal will ever be able to fill the void in our hearts that her loss has brought.

I am so sorry for your loss. I am so sorry Serenity had to go through that. You are right, it is really hard. I hope that in time, you will find some peace.

I am so sorry for your loss. I am just going through it myself, and in the beginning it doesn't feel like the ache in your heart will ever go away, but slowly, you find it eases a little, then a little more. Come here, post, share your feelings. Here, we all understand, we have all been there. I found posting about my baby, putting up photos, it all helped, a very tiny bit at first, but it helped.

Please may I say how sad I am for the sudden loss of your beloved ReeRee. I feel so much, how heartbroken you must all be. The pain and heartache is unbearable when we lose our 'soulmates',our pets who are such a wonderful part of our lives. I wish I could do more to help to take away some of your pain. In time you will be able to think of ReeRee with 'happy' thoughts again.

Thinking of you

Hugs
Jan and my Angels xx

I am so sorry for your loss and the pain that you are going thru. The pain at first is so unbearable that you think you will never recover but you will. I think one of the most important things for you to do is to feel every emotion, as hard as it is I think that's what eventually leads to acceptance. This is a great place to come and post your feelings, you will get much needed support from people who understand the loss of a special animal. You will always miss Serenity (Reeree) but the sharp pain will go away with time.

Hi, Reeree, please permit me to offer you my sincerest sympathies in the loss of your beloved companion, Serenity. Losing a beloved companion is never easy regardless of the circumstances or how long we have been blessed with the privilege of their company. It doesn't matter if it's your first experience of loss of a beloved companion or your thousandth, the deep feelings of sorrow and loss - - both physical and emotional - - are overwhelming particularly in the first phase of deep grief. Clinical studies now accept the fact that the grief healing journey for the loss of a beloved companion are identical to the journey from the loss of a loved human family member or friend. It is a one day at a time journey, with studies showing that children grieve differently than adults, and adult men and women grieve differently as well. I can understand how tragic this loss is for you and your family for as a very young child many many many years ago a precious kitty of mine was shot with an air rifle and died from his injury on Thanksgiving Day. We never knew who did it, but we knew that it was done deliberately because of the violent neighborhood I grew up in. There were other negative family factors involved, too, which made my first experience at loss a very difficult one. So, it is important that you and your children feel free to openly talk about your feelings so that you can comfort one another and heal together as a family.

During the first weeks, months, you will feel like you are functioning on "automatic pilot." Things get done -- bills get paid, laundry gets done, meals get fixed, you function on your job, etc. - - but it feels like you're not involved with "reality." This is your mind and body protecting you from the reality of your loss. You will experience your emotions in phases - - and waves of emotion - - which allows your mind and body to process the depth of your grief and heal - - according to your individual needs. It is so important that you and your family openly grieve. If you suppress your feelings then clinical studies show that the healing from this loss is prolonged and actually more painful.

Reeree, it is not a goal to "move on" or to "forget" your precious Serenity. Some people think this is what needs to be done in order to heal. First of all, it is impossible to "forget" this life that has brought so much unconditional love and undivided attention to your lives. Serenity is forever in your hearts and memories. The goal for healing in your loss is to be able to remember your precious Serenity without the deep pain of grief. And that will happen, slowly, but eventually one day you will find yourself thinking about her or talking about her and you will find yourself smiling instead of emotionally crumbling into tears and gut-wrenching sobbing. You will be able to remember Serenity and feel her swwt living Spirit close to you, and you will find yourself smiling.

Some people find it helpful to make a memory scrapbook, or do a video of their beloved companion's life, or plant a memorial garden, or make a donation to a humane society or rescue group in their beloved companion's name - - just to name a few examples. Some people find it helpful to keep a journal of their feelings and memories of their beloved companion. And some folks just hold their memories in their hearts. Each person finds their own way to heal from a loss.

One of the most important things you and your family need to remember is that you are not alone in this grief journey. It is filled with so many different emotions - - highs and lows - - it can feel like you're on a nightmare roller coaster ride, particularly in the beginning phase. Just remember that each of us here does understand what you and your family are going through, and we are here for you for as long and as often as you need us. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, Reeree, and please let us know how you and your family are doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

Let me first start by offering you my most sincere condelences to you in your time of need. Losing a beloved pet is hard. I too lost my cat Friend two weeks ago in a horrific accident. He was hit by a car and, it was hard to see him go that way. I'm sure right now you're feeling a series of mixed emotions which are normal. Everybody has their ups and downs. I think the best thing right now for you to do is go along with the grieving process. Let your emotions out whenever, wherever. Everybody grieves differently so take all the time you need. This will be a long and hard road and slowy but surely it will get better. If at any time it gets to be to much, come here and let it all out. We have all been through this before and we will surely lend out a helping hand.

You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

Hopelessheart (Friend's Mom)

I am so very sorry to hear of your loss. What a terrible, heartwrenching thing. I'm so glad you have come here to help you and perhaps your family through the grief. Sometime when I feel grief's fist closing around my throat once again after a bad day, a happy memory, seeing her in a shadow... Then I come here and know the people here know how much I hurt. How deeply I hurt. And I get the support I need to face those who try to brush off the loss of my furrbaby as "she was just a cat". Because she wasn't just a cat, she was a family member who was loved beyond imagining, much like I sense your Serenity was. They make our lives complete, and when they go - especially unexpectedly - it leaves a gaping jagged hole and we don't know how to help it heal. Start here. We know. I hope know that brings you some small measure of piece, or at least the ability to draw a deep breath. Day by day it will get better. Not every day is good, but as time elapse the easier days do come.

My thoughts are with you and your family
Alison (Tatem's Mama)

First, I would like to thank all of you for your kind words and thoughts. It means a lot to me to know that there are people who've gone through the same thing my family is going through now. Today was an especially hard day because our 4 year old daughter finally understood what we meant when we told her ReeRee wasn't coming back. It was especially hard to comfort my child knowing I was feeling the same void she was now beginning to understand. I was wondering if it is appropriate to let my children do some kind of memorial service for Serenity? Does anyone have any input or advice on this part of the grieving process? I really feel given the circumstances that we all might benefit from some sense of closure.

Hi, Reeree, doing a Memorial Service for your precious Serenity is one of many excellent ways to help with the grieving process. You can even post a notice in your local newspaper and ask for donations to be sent to your local humane society, or if your veterinarian has a "Good Samaritan Fund" to send them to your vet's office in loving memory of your precious Serenity. Some folks even put donation jars at local businesses to collect money in loving memory of their precious companion and send those funds to humane societies or to veterinary colleges who are doing specialized research into specific illnesses, etc..

Reeree, there is no "wrong" way to grieve the loss of a beloved family member or friend - - whatever the life form - - unless it becomes self-destructive. Our beloved companions honor us with their unconditional love and undivided attention and devotion. It is absolutely appropriate that we find some way to honor their life's journey with us on this side of eternity that will also help us in our healing journey as we adjust to the physical absence of their sweet precious presence in our lives.

Reeree, please know that we are here for you and your family each step of the way for as long and as often as you need us. Please know you and your family are close in my thoughts and prayers, and please let us know how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

Dear ReeRee--

Your story was so shocking and painful and horrifying that I couldn't respond when it first appeared. (I was having a bad couple of days myself.) The violence of it it just unbelievable--I am SO Sorry that you have had to go through this. It makes me angry, it makes me cry, it makes me want to go smash plates against rocks or something...

I totally agree with everything everyone else has said, and suggest too that if you haven't read it yet, you go read the wise words of Blindsided Too in my thread called "Blindsided too--Please post some more." She has very sage things to say about the death of our animals.

My heart aches for you and your family--

Margi and Ladywolf

Missing... I appreciated your message on the thread about Dutch. As you know, it's hard to come back here sometimes, so when you find yourself back here, I hope you find strength, comfort and solace in the messages that have been added since you were here last.

Sudden loss such as yours is so different than loss from a long sickness; the dynamics of it are different. There's no planning, there's no preparing yourself, there's no warning, or saying goodbye. My family has lost dogs to cars, and I do understand the shock and what-ifs. All loss has what-ifs but the sudden losses are different, and the blame game is a tremendous temptation - to others and to self.

Bottom line is, nobody can reverse time. You can only move forward. You won't forget, you won't necessarily forgive quickly (although you really should eventually, because to not forgive will simply eat you alive), but you can move forward.

A memorial is a very helpful first step. Telling stories and sharing memories about Serenity are good ways of keeping her alive in your family. We do that with Dutch - my kindergartner mentions her about every other week even now. We keep her pictures up.

And now I'll say something because I feel it (and I apologize in advance if there's something I don't know)... I feel also for your neighbor who put his GSDs down. Unless he was a brute who trained his dogs to fight and kill, it sounds like he did this out of remorse for what happened, and concern for the community. Perhaps he is also grieving the loss of two furbabies, and what parent wouldn't be grieving if our own children had committed an act such as this?

I know it didn't make you feel better; it didn't bring Serenity back. Just wanted to mention I was thinking of him as well. Bad things happen.

Hope the pain subsides sooner rather than later. But be patient with yourselves, and work hard on remembering Serenity's joyful life.

"Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending. " - Carl Bard