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Lightning-Strike Pet Loss Support Forum > Pet Loss Support > Death and Dying Pet Support
Ken Albin
Miss Kitty was almost 15 years old and we have had her for about 14 of those years. She was the last of the cats who wandered over from a nearby barn and she was the first to get us into the adoption business. She had been losing weight the past 6 months so we took Miss Kitty in for a checkup and blood work. The news was not good. Our vet, a good cat doctor, suggested triaditis due to her previous severe IBD epidodes over the years. Her neutrophil white blood cell count indicated an active infection or inflammation and her liver enzyme levels indicated cell death. She had stopped eating and was throwing up. The most likely choices were triaditis, a somewhat controversial cluster of problems that might be treatable, and secondary liver tumors from cancer, not really treatable.

You go with what you can treat so this week we threw everything at the triaditis. Pain meds, anti-nausea med, two antobiotics, steroid shots, fluid replacement, an amino acid breakdown product that helps to repair liver damage and stabilize liver enzymes, a B12 shot, and an appetite stimulant. We also began force feedings to build her up.

Miss kitty improved for a couple of days this week and then crashed last night. She spent the night hiding under a bookshelf in obvious distress but no severe pain yet. Looking at her I could see the first signs she was going downhill. Her quality of life was slipping away and her blood work had not improved. After spending most of the night with her we made the difficult decision to end her life as peacefully as possible. We consulted with our vet. He had mixed feelings about it, possibly wanting to try for another week. He could see her decline from a few days ago and said he understood our decision since we knew Miss Kitty better than he did. If I thought there was a chance to cure her I would have tried it but I could see her beginning to suffer and I swore that would never happen if there was no hope. I do not want to be one of those people who keep a furkid around for a couple of more weeks out of selfishness, causing them pain. The only thing that was keeping her going at this point was the Buprenex pain medication. After discussing it with the vet we made the final decision.

Miss Kitty's catheter had worked itself out of the vein so the vet gave her a mixture of pain drugs before shaving her hind leg and injecting the phenobarbitol solution directly into the vein. This would sting had she been awake. We said our goodbyes to Miss Kitty and she purred and rubbed her head against our hands. The shot then kicked in quickly and she went into a deep sleep. The phenobarbitol injection took about 10 seconds to fully work but she was already knocked out so she did not register any response.

We took Miss Kitty home and buried her in the back yard with her angel kitty toy. Now I am selfishly allowing myself to cry tears of loss, something we did not want to do while comforting her in her last moments of consciousness. Miss Kitty had a long and wonderful indoor life with us. We miss our little Queenie so much and the pain is almost unbearable. That is ok though because she is not hurting any more and this day is about Miss Kitty, not us. She was a very special kitty and we tried to give her the best over her years with us. There is a huge hole in our hearts now from her loss but it was the best thing for her. I will see you again one day, little girl. Love you. Here is Miss Kitty with her angel kitty toy.
tanbuck
Ken, I am so sorry for your loss. It sounds like you knew you did the right thing for her even though it hurts so bad. Miss Kitty's last days sound alot like my Frasier's. Your description of her last moments were just like Frasier's. Just moments before he passed, he was purring and even drank a sip of water on his own. Once the sedative took effect, the purring stopped and I knew he was relaxed. It bothered me still, though, to think of him purring for me.
I can hear the love you had for your Miss Kitty through your words. My heart goes out to you now as you begin life without her there to touch. Allowing yourself the time to grieve is a good thing and it sounds like you are doing that. Thank you for posting your story.
patricia
dear ken, im so sorry for your loss. little miss kitty looks exactly like my fred who passed away not too long ago from diabetes complications. what a sweet little girl. i know shes upstairs now meeting her twin, fred. it stinks for us though doesnt it? we are left behind with the pain and the deep anguish from missing them so much. i hold on to the fact that one day we will all be reunited with our little loved ones and what a wonderful day that will be.
your are in my thoughts and prayers.
patricia
chele
Ken, I am so sorry you had to let Miss Kitty go. It's a terrible decision to have to make, but you had the courage and the love to do the right thing and end her suffering.
magdalene
I am so very sorry for your loss. Miss Kitty is a beautiful girl. It sounds like you made the right decision. I think letting them go when it's time is the most loving thing we can do for them, even though it is very, very hard.

Magdalene
petmum
a tough call Ken but one I can totally understand (& relate to).....you are the best cat daddy to do that for Miss Kitty.
you are in my thoughts.
elaine
kimm
Dear Ken,

I am so sorry for your loss. You made the best decision you could have by letting her go peacefully. Thanks for sharing that picture, she looks like such a happy girl, playing with her angel toy. It just hurts so much, I know. The tears will flow now, and they need to. Let it out. But please take comfort in the fact that she isn't suffering anymore. You gave her all the love a kitty could have possibly asked for. She needed you to do this for her. That was a courageous act of love. I am thinking of you.
LoveThem
Dear Ken

I am so sorry for your loss of such a precious girl.

I think the words that fit what happened would be these:

I have sent you on a journey to a land free from pain, not because I did not love you but because I loved you too much to force you to stay.


I'm sorry it was her time but you truly did all the right things and she knew that. A vet told me long ago to use the quality of life as my guide and when you used those words...that was the right "page".

Hugs.......... and a special hug to your new Angel, Miss Kitty.

Judy


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