It's taken me a few days to get settled enough from the whole Christmas 'package' in order to share this with all of you, but here now is my story of how none other than ((((((( my beloved Nissa ))))))) got me through the sorrow of my 3rd Christmas (she's been 'gone' 2 yrs., 4 months as of this Christmas = Xmas '06, '07 & now '08)) without her physical presence.

As a bit of a preface, I'd had an awfully upsetting Christmas Eve, with disappointments and a withdrawal/lack of love surface around me, so much so that I spent a good deal of the evening in tears, and this of course only exacerbated how I'd already been feeling over missing my dear, sweet and ever-loving Little Nis', especially at this time of year and more particularly, just prior to another dreaded C h r i s t m a s D a y .

Hence, when I awoke on the morning of Christmas Day, after having then had a restless and troubled sleep, I was in quite the negative state and more than aware of how much my heart was aching and yearning for days of yesteryear with my kids. I spent a few minutes trying to fully wake up (not a morning person to begin with), doing first 19 clicks, then another 13 clicks on The Animal Rescue Site, in honour of both of my kids' numbers, and knowing that the # of clicks for bowls of food for shelter animals always plummets on wknds. and major holidays.

I'd just finished this task when our smoke detector upstairs suddenly began 'yelling'. This was very odd as there had been no major upward change in humidity or anything else notable to possibly set it off, as sometimes happens with these devices. This had happened last summer while we were away, BUT, the humidity had sky-rocketed with constant rain and there was no air movement due to our absence. Our neighbour and house-checker, had heard it and so we even replaced the battery when we got home from our trip. So the battery wasn't too old, either.

My husband was awakened by the noise and was already trying to pull the detector down off the ceiling as I climbed the stairs with something to fan at it. But rather than wait for that, he pulled the battery right out and laid the detector and the battery, separately, on the bathroom counter off the hallway. He was leaving the bathroom just as two things transpired concurrently. Firstly, I was suddenly drawn to check the reading on our portable humidistat/temperature gauge that also sits in the hall, and at the same time as I was doing that, the smoke detector let out one more 'bleep'....even though it had no battery power attached to it. What I saw on the humidistat/temp. device blew me right away ---- the humidity level reading was showing "23%", and the temperature reading was "19C".......BOTH of Nissa's numbers, side by side!!!!

In that instant I absolutely FELT and KNEW that, since spirit often finds it easier to play with electrical energy than some other forms to contact us and say "hello! I'm here!", coupled with yet another of countless 'reminders' of her particular numbers, THIS WAS INDEED MY NISSA-GIRL WISHING ME A "Merry Christmas, Mom!!" and a "Yes, I'm RIGHT HERE WITH YOU THIS CHRISTMAS DAY, so don't fret!!" It struck me, too, that the sheer loudness of a smoke detector, along with the early morning hour were both symbolically indicative of our girl's ways when she was in the physical with us - getting us up early, very often by yelling at us from the hallway, or the top of the stairs, both spots close to this detector. In fact, I often also called her my Little Loudie." Connecting these multi-layered 'dots' helped me feel SO blessed, something I never expected I'd feel like for even one moment on any Christmas Day since she'd transitioned.

And so I was reminded, in a form befitting Nissa's regular and ever-so-precious ways, that no matter what amount of love had been withheld from me by others, I could always count on (((MY GAL))) and her Endless Love for me, and of that between us, to carry me through the toughest of times. And so she did carry me through Christmas Day, having reassured my heart and soul that she never, ever leaves me, just as she'd promised she wouldn't.

I love you so, so very much, my Sweetie-Pie-Pie. Always have, still do, always will, forever and ever. The gifts you STILL give to me are more treasured than the air I breathe, and my heart is eternally grateful for being as connected with each other as we are, and shall always be, no matter what. I love my little girl, endlessly. I love you, I love you, I LOVE you!!!! And thank-you, Hon-Bunnie, more than words can ever express, for your blessed message of love, loyalty and compassion, and for still being a Little Grey Smartie in order to do that for your dear, ol' Mom. You're a little grey wonder, you are, same as ever!!

Loving You More Every Single Day ,
Your Mom

Not much I can say here but

WOW!

I can tell from your words that this was one heck of a Christmas Day for you even though you are physically apart from your beloved Nissa. She knew you needed her more than ever.

I am overjoyed for you.

Ginger

Loved the story...and the picture.

A picture captures a moment forever!


She truly is a beautiful "gal".

Thanks for sharing.

Judy

A true Love Story!...That was great!..Sometimes the energy we put out is too hard for them to ignor and they have a way of opening up our senses and showing themselves in ways only we can grasp. One night driving home from work I cried uncontrolably missing my baby so much. Out loud I said "I miss you badly" and at that very moment I saw a shooting star. Believe in it and it will be there..Nissa came to you when you needed her the most. Congrats!..Ann

That Nissa...Mistress of the Grand Gesture!

Yes, that's what you get with one of the queens of Egypt!

Thanks so much, everyone, for acknowledging the latest of my beloved girl's most-welcome message. It's still keeping me afloat....and I've been once again surrounded by "23's" everywhere I look, or hear, each and every day. She's one amazing and huge bundle of love, no longer defined by the tiniest of packages, but able to now be as VAST as her glorious and far-reaching soul always was!

And yet, she's "right at (my) feet", still, as one Shamanic healer recently told me. In fact, she said Nissa had been The One to "orchestrate" everything for all of us, all along, and she was 'sitting' there telling her......it was me.....memememememememeME!" Like I said, Little Loudie, who wants to be HEARD! And no, she didn't have a vane bone in her tiny body, but just loved to EXPRESS herself! And I'm SO glad that delightful personality trait has stuck with her! I wouldn't have it any other way, given a choice!

There's a cat at my shelter whose name is Nissa too, and like yours, she has this all about me thing going on too. Must be the name. Your story is certainly special, but could you help me understand a little more about the 23, 19, and 13 number thing?? Is it because she's been gone 2yrs and 3 xmas's?? I'd love to hear more. Seems my worst number has been 8. Every year that falls on an 8 since as far back as I can remember has not held good things with me. My life path nbr too. Which makes me think sometimes what can go wrong will. And it is because of that 8 nbr, last year I just had a cloud of doom over me. I couldn't shake the feeling that I was going to lose Arthur too. And it happened on an 8 day. Anyways just wanted to know about 23..Thanks ..Ann

Hi Ann,

I'm more than happy to explain these #s. Gives me an excuse to talk more about my kids and what they've done for me!

But first, I even consider what YOU shared as another sign for me! Seeing as Nissa's name isn't all that common, it's only shown up for me as a form of a sign, at least so far. In fact, the first time this happened, 'coincidentally' (in single quotes cuz I no longer believe anything is coincidental), it was close to another Xmas w/o her. I'd been getting ready to go out to a mediumship event, we'd asked Nissa to PLEEEEEASE go with me, be around me and even come through in one of the readings that night. (she didn't do the latter but did many OTHER things) Mere minutes after I'd asked, I turned on the radio to flip around stations and was drawn to listen to this one talk show.....longer story a bit shorter (this was actually the 2nd sign she'd sent after our request), the guest suddenly mentioned some saint I'd never heard of, and I almost fell over! He used an uncommon form of this saint's name, which was actually Gregory....but HE said "Greg"......"Greg of NISSA!" (he then explained that he now always called him "Greg" instead because this was his favorite Saint and he felt very familiar with him) A double or even triple-whammy for me all at once, cuz we'd often called Nissa, "Nissa The GREY", and Greg is different from Grey by only one letter, plus of course, I couldn't have BEEN more "familiar" with my girl than I was! It was a real "WHOA!" sign for me! The rest of the evening was absolutely CHOCK-FULL of signs from her to me.....it was simply beeoooooteeful! So, yes, I consider what YOU shared to be yet another way for my girl to make her presence known, as she ALSO has used forms of her name for me, just not as often as her numbers, since her name isn't commonly around much. So, hey....THANKS for being a conduit for her!

As for these numbers......"23" is her Angelversary date (of Aug.); "19" was her age in whole #s (19 yrs.+7 months);"13" was her brother, Sabin's, age. Sabin's #s were also very synchronous because he was actually "13 years and 13 days old when he 'left', and he also crossed with a ton of "2"s -- 02/02/2000. And yet, he began IMMEDIATELY to send me TONS of "13"s everywhere I turned. This turned out to be one of the earliest introductions for me as to how they can come through, and what signs from our loved ones often consist of. Most significant, too, because he was, of course, a black cat, but with a tiny white "fluff" on the end of his tail, which we used to joke lent him good luck, versus the (stupid) superstitious nonsense about black cats. Plus, after his transition and this unending (to this day) series of "13"s, Friday the 13th always became the luckiest of days for me! Ha! I love them!

Anyway, it seems my girl has taken up the 'family tradition' of using her numbers to get my attention, or to answer my pleas for continuing connection and comfort. That in itself is something that totally delights me! A "family tradition' of HOW TO COME THROUGH so I'll recognize it easily. I have Sabin to thank for coming up with this personalized method for ME in the first place, of course.....though it IS a fairly common way for spirit to make us sit up and take notice, each tied to our OWN personally meaningful #s.

I even did a little experiment with Sabin's "13" a few times in a row, and it actually worked out! I began counting and marking them down as I got them, and if they started to dwindle even a little bit, I'd re-ask him to send MORE again, and often w/i the same day, or at the very worst the next day, up they'd go again, often WAAAAY up. They'd be in the paper, on the TV, on the radio, on signs, in someone's conversation....all over the place! Some days I'd get around 20!....enough to make me actually crack a huge smile, knowing he'd been carefully listening and lovingly obliging his Mom! It was great! He obviously wanted to make darn sure I GOT this connection well and so could find great comfort in it being from him, for certain. He'd always been a Master of these kinds of things, and he still is. And now, his sister's doing just as much if not more, but in some different ways, too. I'm just so PROUD of them!

On a general note, I'm not sure if you're aware of this feature but if you move your cursor overtop a member's name, then click on the little arrow that shows up in a box surrounding the name, it gives you a few options to follow, including "View Member's Posts" or "View Member's Topics", i.e. the threads they started themselves. Just mentioning this cuz I've written about some of these things before, if you wish to look for them. (or for anyone else's stories/history)

As for your own number 8 significance, it could just be that for your particular soul, you're very tied into cycles of 8, numerologically-speaking, but maybe just for a certain period of time. Perhaps you could go to a good numerologist someday and find out about this, as it might give you more insight into what that means for you. I wouldn't be surprised if you found out there's good reason (even if that's not apparent to your waking consciousness yet), AND more positive meanings to your recurring number.

P.S. Adding this, too, as it's also significant, to my mind:
According to Doreen Virtue's "Angel Numbers 101", 13 and 23 are very similar in meaning.

"13" means: "The ascended master (such as Jesus, Quan Yin, etc.) are with you, helping you maintain a positive outlook. The #13 signifies that female ascended masters and goddesses are assisting you in staying positive."
"23" means: "You are working closely with one or more ascended masters such as Jesus, Moses, the saints" (maybe like Greg of Nissa?!?! ) "or the goddesses. This is a message from your ascended-master guides, who can see that the answer to your prayers is within reach. They encourage you to stay positive to ensure that you attract the best possible outcome."

Pretty cool that they're so similar! (and I DO get more "23"s over "19"s for Nissa, btw)

Thanks for the explanation. Pretty cool! Ever hit the lottery with those #'s? Also, glad my little shelter friend brought a smile to you. She's a sweet cat and I hope she gets adopted soon, perhaps on the 23rd???? Wouldn't that be something. ..As for me and the #8, it's getting to the point it scares me, and I couldn't wait for the year to be over! The absolute worst was 1988. A double whammy. I suffered a set back every single month throughtout that year. Totally awful. Maybe there is something to it. / Thanks again..I just love sign stories, as it was just that, that brought me here to being with..Ann

WOW is about all to say to it!!!!!!

Glad you get so many signs.. I'm sure lots of people get them, but they just don't really know or understand it.

Congtratulations!!!

Hugs!!!!!!!!!

Hi Ann,

No, I haven't won any lottery yet....but maybe I was supposed to a couple of times! I'd noticed (e.i. was DRAWN to notice as I usually ignore lottery stuff & haven't bought any tickets in decades) once there was a 13 million dollar prize, and asked my H to pick up a lottery ticket on his way home that night. He forgot. One other time, the deadline for a local charity's lottery was on the 23rd, but he didn't want to buy any tickets (these were more $$ ones). So who knows? Maybe we missed our big opportunity, twice! It wouldn't surprise me in the least if our kidlets had been trying to give us a big, financial lift, seeing as we'd always spent the bulk of our money on THEIR care, doing w/o ourselves. Other people thought we were "crazy", but we knew in our hearts that it was the right thing to do...and that these same people did much the same with their human kids, so too bad, so sad if they didn't agree with our choices. Heck, we didn't even get Cable TV after we'd moved here, for about 11 or 12 years, because we needed the money more for Nissa's care, and I never regretted doing things that way. Our kids were always worth FAR more than stupid human 'toys' and distractions. This was probably one of the many reasons they incarnated to US, since we've always been frugal and they knew they'd need people like us in order to get better care than most, given their physically-inherent, particular weaknesses. All part of each of our Divine Soul Plans, meshed together beautifully, is how I see it.

Re: your #8s....it may help you to know that 2008 in particular, and even the period from 2004 up to now, has been fraught with challenges for many, many humans on the planet....more than usual, apparently. And you can include me in the 2008 Year of "You've GOT To Be Kidding Me!!!" However...2009 is supposed to carry a great and much smoother shift towards the better for most folks, despite any challenges, and this should also include Mother Earth as well (since we're just as connected to 'Her' energies as to any other ones). And possibly speaking to this shift, see below...

Hi Sissycat,

Yes, I've actually almost filled up one journal with signs from my kids over the last 2 yrs., there have been that many. I think I would have ended up in a psych. ward if not for that, my heart has been so broken w/o them both.

And speaking of which, and perhaps even as an aid to seeing '09 as the start of a better year, I just got one from my BOY last night, too! I'd been playing a bit with our neighbour's cat, who'd been staying here AGAIN due to a return of severely cold weather where he'd have to stay in his garage otherwise. I'd recently discovered that he really enjoys my plastic 'bag' game, a game I'd played a LOT with our kids, but most especially with Sabin, who liked it the most. I really 'went to town' with it last night, immersing myself in the joy and extreme humour of it, stopping worrying about getting slashed by this cat's long claws (something I'd never had to worry about with OUR kids)....and I suddenly felt as if I was playing with my Sabin-boy. I just got into the wholeness of the game and this familiar (and sorely missed) FEELING. Then, a mere 5 minutes later when I sat down to watch a bit of the news, with this cat now on my lap, suddenly in one story somewhere out of the U.S., there was this guy they were interviewing......one Jim.....SABIN!!!! Wow......I turned to my H and started laughing with delight and told him what I'd just been experiencing moments before this happened. But come on.....I've NEVER seen anyone in the present world with that as a last name before!

And it wasn't over yet....as I sat basking in this sign from my boy, immediately following this, out of the corner of my eye (but not even the extreme peripheral corner), over on what I now call "Nissa's chair" (but Sabin used it a lot, too), where it sits draped with a blanket that bears her massive, woven-in picture, the same one from my avatar here (with Sabin's pic. on the folded-over 'side'), I SWORE I saw Sabin's beautiful black tail move, as if he was just jumping down from this chair! And to add to the picture, this other cat turned his head that way as well (his bum was facing my chest, so my head turning wasn't a visual clue for him), and KEPT looking over there for the next couple of minutes....as if he'd seen something, too!

Man!......I just LOOOOOOOVE my kids and how they still take care of my needs!!!!!! What BETTER thing to get blown away with than this continuing love between us!? (of course, I still miss them in the physical just as much as ever, but it's better than nothing)

It might also interest all of you here to hear about something regarding Digital Signals coming in soon for TV stations. I heard this in a talk with Dannion Brinkley (see his bio. here), who says that once an*alog signals are replaced by the newer digital signals, spirit will be much more able to communicate with us through these higher-frequency signals. YIPPEE!!! Can't WAIT! I don't know HOW exactly this will manifest, but am trusting that it will and look forward to 'feeling into' my kids as I sit in front of the 'b*oob-tube' in expectancy of more of these 'hellos'! I can feel it coming, too, as more and more electronic gizmos seem to be messing up with me, and with many other people lately. It's in the 'air' already......



And if anyone's wondering about what to be aware of with possible signs, you can visit What's An ADC? from Bill & Judy Guggenheim's website for a partial listing - the most common ones they found from their research.

Also helpful may be their list of recommended books dealing with afterlife signs, or as I like to call it, the "continuing life" - ADC books.

I was looking for a kitty in rescue to sponsor, in memory of BK., and I found a sweet little gray one, with golden eyes...who is being called Lissa by the rescue folks. I sent a little donation towards some surgery for her as a sign of my admiration for Nissa, and in memory of BK. I hope she has a forever home soon.

Oooohhhhhh.......this whole story is sooooo sweet! Warmed my heart right up, it did! Thank you SO much for thinking of my girl in the same breath as you were making such a lovely memorial gesture for BK. And yes, let us hope that this other precious one will be adopted ASAP. Bet she has 'magic' in her, too. These grey bundles......and the black ones, too, of course!

In keeping with getting signs of my kids' around me (oh, and the alarm went off AGAIN a few days ago, with the same settings on the gauge...oh, man!), and given that I've been having nothing but a huge cry-fest since my darlings' Birthday date on Jan.20th, I found this other lovely song, that I think speaks to these reminders of how close they really are, even through all the tears of missing them, even through our yearning....

As a prelude to this, we used to also call Sabin, "Smiley-Guy", for the way he'd 'grin' really widely and open-mouthed when we'd tousle him with a toy or our hands, especially for some reason when he was on the stair-steps, and at the same time he'd yowl in joy - "AAAAaaaaayyy!!" And then he'd suddenly TEAR off at break-neck speed, hoping to then get chased. And I've noticed already that our neighbour's cat (the one who visits all the time and who also loves Sabin's "bag game") opens his mouth the same way, although he doesn't accompany it with a yowl....and oftentimes also tears off across the room. The first time I saw this, my heart skipped a beat...it had been sooooo long since I'd seen such a shadow of my Smiley-Guy's joy. So once you hear the words....

It seems apt to post this one here.
"I Find Your Love" - Beth Nielson Chapman

I'm just a blubbering mess lately, despite all these signs of comfort and reassurance. I just want my OLD life back!

I know.
Thinking of you,
Bubba.................

Aaww, thanks, Bubba. Sometimes the simplest words of understanding really say it all and help us feel less alone....

I always say: We will love them forever and miss them forever. I cannot think of a truer remark to say.

Happy Birthday (Jan 20) to your babies. There are a lucky few that I have heard of that lived to be age 22 and some beyond. All we can do is be grateful for each year they were allowed to stay in our lives.

They become beautiful Angels watching over us until the day we are reunited with them.

And, another thing I also say is that we must be reunited someday cause if not, then it would
never be Heaven.

Hugs, good thoughts and prayers to you and your babies. We are allowed to find ourselves taking backward steps from time to time.....back into the grief we thought we were controlling. It is okay to cry. What they give us can never be replaced and yes, we miss them so very much..and that's the way it will always be.

Judy

Judy

Thank-you, Judy, for your hugs, wishes, thoughts and prayers for us. I was so distraught and pressed for time on the 23rd (of Jan.), that I never even got the chance to start another topic for my girl's monthly angelversary, when I'd so wanted to! Even now, even though I know it's useless, there's another niggley piece of guilt....ugh. The only good thing about time seeming to just fly by now is that it puts me that much closer to when I can return to the bliss of being with my furbabies.

That's exactly right - heaven, or whatever you wish to call that realm, would be pointless if our loved ones weren't there, or at least available to us whenever we wanted.....and for those of us here, I'm betting the farm that would be ALL the time! Just think of it - we could defy the laws of physical earth and be anywhere or do anything else we wanted, but our kids could be right there WITH us at the same time! No "Pets Not Allowed" here or there nonsense!

And yes, those tough feelings persist in revisiting us. For some, it's worse on the monthly marker days, for others it's on certain weekdays (when our babies 'left'), or on birthdays, and for some it's mainly only on the yearly dates, &/or half-yearly. But there's almost always one date or another, plus some major holidays, when it all creeps out of the closet again. It IS good to give ourselves permission to lean into the pain again when we need to, but even if we know this is true, it's ALWAYS comforting to hear someone else say it, too. "If only" the whole world would give us that allowance as well. That would make it much easier to bear.

One ACer I used within the last year told me that she sensed both Nissa and Sabin as sort of one 'unit' together. That's how they were coming through to her. There were no "I" statements, but always "we" statements in everything 'they' said, and she had to keep correcting herself, as I'd directed questions specifically to each of them. And oh my....that made me feel SO much better! It just felt so "right" and comforting to me, to have them so entwined. And yet, at the same time, she also saw mine and Nissa's essences also entwined, which she had to describe to me as the Vesica Piscis symbol (Jesus Fish symbol), as she'd never seen anything quite like that before in all her work with animals. And that thrilled me to the core, too! But....it's no wonder then, that I still always feel like I'm missing huge chunks of my spirit, even if they are both still with me. As someone else here said once, my heart just doesn't have a home now.

Yes, I use the term "Heaven" because it is all I know that is only one word that is supposed to describe the perfect place to be...nothing bad can ever happen....everyone is happy and content and surrounded by love. There is no pain, no guilt, no negative thoughts, feelings, events..ever.
It is whatever we wish it to be. And you put forth some pretty good descriptions of what it can be like.

I think in your last paragraph speaking of "we" and not "I" just sounds to me as if that is the way it is because....you and your babies are all a "family" and so "we" fits perfectly. There is no aloneness in "we". It is further proof that even though their bodies leave us, our babies souls and spirits are a part of us forever......and your use of the word "entwined" fits that perfectly.

I think your heart IS a home....it is a place where your babies are permanently and forever
there. They are a part of your heart and memories. They are safe with you and they watch over you always.

As far as taking a step back into grieving, I think grief has many parts. Some ways we feel so much alike here about our losses; yet, there are no rules about grieving and each must find their own way to healing. There is no one answer fits all. And that can mean all answers can be okay.

It helps when one knows others have felt exactly the same way and that is part of what we learn here. From that we know by sharing how we feel, if even one word "touches" another here and helps them through their grief....it comes back to us many times over. For we learn by helping another, we also help ourselves.

Take care, take a deep breath and relax, and here's a special cyberhug for you and through you...to your babies too.

Judy

Profound thoughts- I always liked this quote, it kind of makes sense~

The gods conceal from men the happiness of death, that they may endure life.

---Lucan

And also-

Death--- the last sleep? No the final awakening.

---Walter Scott

Hugs to Nissa and Sabin today. May sunshine, love and catnip fill their day.
~NM

OOOOOOOOOOooooooooooo!!!!!!!! Those are both great quotes! LOVE 'em, especially the last one!! Even though I'm not so sure even THAT's strictly true, really, cuz life is ever-continuing, so there is ALWAYS "awakening" of some sort, every single moment, no matter what plane you're on. Or at least there's the potential for it in every present moment, to be more accurate. The great trick, of course, is to discover how to do more than just "endure" earthly life. I truly believe it was supposed to be about having FUN, but we've ruined the original idea, out of ignorance. But then that's what "awakening" can do for you, too.

But these are still much more comforting quotes than most and both speak so eloquently to the fact that really....there is no death at all, and what better news could we want, overall?

I also just heard, today, a newly coined term that I think I'll take on myself -- "mwe", to stand for the idea that we can experience everything both as individual parts of the Whole, but give acknowledgment to the fact that we're also The All Itself, everything intertwined and never really separate(d). So, a blend of "me" and "we". I think it's brilliant. So "mwe" (which also isn't far off from "mew!" -- hee-hee!) thank you NM, and Judy, too (cuz I forgot to come back to my own thread earlier! ), for these warm thoughts for the One-That-Is-Me-And-My-Kids......

I also just had ANOTHER sign from my girl....one day after her last month's marker, a day I'd been too bagged to be noticing much. A new friend of mine overseas had posted some photos on her blog, and the very first one that caught my eye the next morning was a thumbnail of some clouds, too small to make out until I enlarged it......and saw.......a CAT, laying down, facing away from the camera, with two wings on each shoulder, AND this huge, radiant burst of white light beaming out from the heart-center....and a white dove to the right of this whole scene, in flight....Whoa.....I'd always been able to sense Nissa's and my love absolutely coursing between our heart-centers, and I'm sure she felt it, too, probably even more clearly than I did. And the dove that symbolizes peace, spiritual renewal and self-nurturing.....told me that Nissa IS in such states, and I also sensed that she wanted ME to gain those states of being, too. Still loving her dear, ol' Mom, still looking out for me......oh, I just love her so, so much.