Has anyone else on here had dreams about their lost furbaby all the time?

I dream about my Luba almost every night. Sometimes she's sick in the dreams, sometimes she's in mortal danger and I desperately try and help her (sometimes with, sometimes without success).

The persistant thread in the dreams is that I am saying goodbye to her. That I am given one last opportunity to spend time with her.

I wonder how many of these dreams are still in store for me. They are nice, but also make me feel so sad when I wake up. I wish so much that I would have been able to say my goodbye to her in real life too.

I haven't had but one dream about Ginger. And it wasn't a happy dream.

I used to "study" my own dreams years ago. I learned that there are many different therories about why we dream. some think dreams are messages from our ancestors. some think that dreams are problems from our daily life (and that the symbols we use in dreaming can help us solve them). some think our dreams are nothing more than meaningless excess data spilling into a visual internal dumping ground.

I agree that you are dealing with not saying goodbye in the way you would have wanted. Next time before you go to sleep ask Luba to appear in your dream because you do want to say goodbye. Then try to orchestrate your dream. They call this lucid dreaming and although I was never able to do it for myself you might be able to. If that doesn't work I think you might subscribe to the "data spilling" therory. This has been on your mind in your waking hours and you are simply re-playing it.
I hope next dream won't make you feel sad. I feel sure your Luba does not want you to feel sad at all.

Hmm, interesting idea Gingerspal. To actually think about saying goodbye BEFORE going to sleep.

When I think about it though, I believe that I am still blocking saying a final goodbye to Luba.

I tried to write her a goodbye letter in the memorial section, but only got as far as: "my dear Luba it is time.." then I deleted. I just can't seem to let go of her yet. Maybe that's why all the dreams keep conveying the same message over and over again.

At least the dreams are not the nightmares that they were two weeks after Luba died. Those were horrific. In one of them she was slinking around half dead. These days, they are moslty sad, sometimes scarey.

Steph, your post reminds me that I never said goodbye to Ginger either. I still haven't .

Maybe you can't say goodbye for the same reason I can't--it just doesn't seem like goodbye!
Even though Ginger is not with me in this physical world he is with me all the time.
I still think of Ginger often throughout the day. Sometimes it is melancholy but mostly
they are pleasant thoughts.

How I feel about Ginger is summed up nicely in this poem--maybe this is how you feel too--and why
saying goodbye doesn't feel legitimate. I guess grief counselors advise us to "say goodbye" but
I don't think I ever will.

Death is nothing at all,
I have only slipped into the next room
I am I and you are you
Whatever we were to each other, that we are still.
Call me by my old familiar name,
Speak to me in the easy way which you always used
Put no difference in your tone,
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow
Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes we enjoyed together.
Play, smile, think of me, pray for me.
Let my name be ever the household world that it always was,
Let it be spoken without effect, without the trace of shadow on it.
Life means all that it ever meant.
It it the same as it ever was, there is unbroken continuity.
Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight?
I am waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near,
Just around the corner.
All is well.

Henry Scott Holland
1847-1918
Canon of St Paul's Cathedral

Yes, Gingerspal, that poem touches a deep chord. It certainly feels that way. It is a very positive and healing thing to read.

Interestingly, my partner used the exact words from part of that poem during the days immediately after Luba died. I was crying, saying her name over and over again and saying things like: "I can't believe my little friend just got snuffed out like that."
He kept saying to me: "Luba didn't get "snuffed out" she simply went from one room into the next."

I guess to me all I can think sometimes is that I wish I could at least visit her in that "other room", or she could visit me.

oh me too --what I wouldn't give to be able to hoist him up and give him a smooch! and today the neighbors cat was in our yard--I still have trouble with that because Ginger hated other cats being in HIS yard. Now it seems so disloyal and sad that any other cat gets to be in HIS yard--I know, sounds stupid, doesn't it!? But maybe the day will come when I don't mind......maybe.

Doesn't sound stupid to me in the least!

I brought a neighbourhood dog that I was looking after over to visit Falkor a few weeks ago. He headed straight to Luba's special place as soon as he got into the house. The feeling that came up in me was one of considerable annoyance, but I just quietly said. "Come on, don't go there, let's see Falkor.

It's like the places our lost pets had are a link that we still have with them. Even Falkor won't go on Luba's spots. He walks AROUND them in a big circle. When he found one of her toys he got all hunched over.

anyone that says animals don't have emotions are totally wrong!
luckily for me my indoor kitty didn't have much communication with Ginger
so I don't have to deal with anymore grief or sadness other than my own!
I saw that you were thinking about getting Falkor a pal and I saw the responses too.
Not ever having two pets who were "friends" I don't feel qualified to suggest
anything but I can imagine it is VERY tough sensing that Falkor is lonely for his companion.
glad you understood me with my "jealousy" over the neighbor cat.

Our older cat, Fida, is very definitely mourning the loss of her younger buddy of more than 16 years. For the first couple of days, she was lethargic and depressed. Now she has taken to going to the landing where Chuchelo (our cat whom we had to put to sleep last week) used to like to sit in the sun. Fida now stands on that landing and yowls and yowls and then throws herself down on the carpet. It is heart-wrenching! I'm trying to talk to her much more, check on her throughout the day, pet her, comb her, etc. and it is hard to console her as I need consolation myself.

Yes, it's hard to console them when we are so sad ourselves. Falkor is the younger dog, and has never been in an environment where he is the only dog. He is trying to figure it all out.

Dear Steph, I know what you are going through with the dreams. I posted a while back about the dreams I was having about Samantha, my 15 1/2 year old Siamese who had to be helped to the Rainbow Bridge on June 14 - (my post is on p. 2 now, and folks had some very helpful responses) - it was upsetting me so much I hated to go to bed for the night, as it was almost every night. Talking about them here helped me a LOT, and I haven't had any since. I still miss her terribly, but what seems to be helping me is that at night before I go to bed, I go through the little sayings I used to say to her at bed time, and pray and visualize that she and her beloved Buddy (big orange and white cat, with us 11 years, went to Bridge 4 years ago) are sleeping peacefully together again, and hold that image as I'm going to sleep. Working hard on remembering all the best, cutest things. I know the dreams might come back, but I feel so much better prepared to cope if they should, thanks to all the people here. Here's hoping that happy dreams and peaceful sleep will come along for you soon, and sending hugs.

Athena