Hello.

I have found this message board but see that it is not that active. I hope to get some support. Here is my story.

I have a 10 year old tiger cat. He is an outdoor cat and can fend for himself, so I am not worried about him surviving out there, as it is summertime.

I am in a state of turmoil. He has been gone now almost five weeks and I don't know what to think. It's normal for him to be gone several days at a time, but this is the longest. Before he left on memorial day, he was gone for a 2-week span, stuck around a few days and then left again, so I don't know if he went back to 'wherever' and is just living the life of a cat.

It's the not knowing that is the hardest. At what point do you give up?

Hi Paris! I have answered your question in Mink and Willow's post, if your cat isn't neutered he may well be gone for quite a stretch and will be back. I hope this is the way it will be for you too, I am sending you positive waves, summer is a busy time for these cats hope he comes back to you like mine did after many many months.

Hi Toonie.

Thanks for your reply. I loved your story of your friend tearing down the stairs in the middle of the night! What a miracle.

Cats are indeed strange animals, mysterious and wonderful. I know my cat can fend for himself, and it is hopeful to hear stories of cats coming back after long stretches. I guess this is what is making me torn, will he or won't he come back? (and the only reason he wouldn't come back is, God forbid, something has happened.)

I think the mornings are the worst, because that is when he always came back home from his night time strolling. The first thing I do is look out the window and feel so disappointed when he isn't there.

Hi Paris,

I remember going through similar feelings when I had outdoor cats. You mentioned mornings being the hardest... I remember! I had a cat once who came home after 25 days, and another who came home after 6 weeks. (The one who had been missing for 6 weeks had gotten into someone's shed and was trapped until the person went back in and found her.) Last year a friend of mine's cat was missing for 11 days and he was also trapped in someone's shed !

The pain must be unbearable. I am sending prayers and positive thoughts that your precious baby comes home soon.

About that kitty of my friend's.. I usually don't pray (I never seem to take the time) but the night before Mack came home, I found myself praying really hard, crying, for Mack to please be able to find a way to come home... I'll never forget that. It might have been just a coincidence, but it was almost as though my prayer put out extra energy that helped a miracle to happen.

Anyway, I'm sending prayers for guidance for your baby. Keep in touch!

Love,
Kathy

paris

Well I don't think I'd give up quite yet. It is summer and he can fend for himself. I'd be very worried, like you, but I think there is still hope. I'd keep looking for him out the window in the mornings and just KNOW he's gonna be there.

Thinking of him and you.

Hello all.

Woke up at 6:00, went to window, no cat.

Every day that goes by is a drop of sand in an hour glass that takes me another step towards the fear that Bennett will not come home. I wish I could fast-forward a year. This is worse than having a pet die, where you can mourn and move on.

I called one of the animal rescue organizations and the guy told me my cat was probably "living with someone else" or "taken by a predator". Nice. They say there are these horrible weasles called "fisher cats" that kill cats. I know that my cat is very strong and a fighter, but if he was snuck up upon from behind....at any rate, the images are disturbing.

Paris, I agree, but I still hope for you, as I have said, many do return, there is for now as much likelihood that Bennet will be found, truly I hope you will know this joy. I have lost my two 13 year old house cats last fall, one to heart disease and the other to diabetes. Both were always free to roam but they always came back ususally in the middle of the night so that I would be pulled from deep sleep when they meowed. I sure miss all this, I know you know what I mean.... We have woods all around us, there are fishers and racoons and skunks all over the place. I have many feral barn cats, I know that skunks and racoons join them to finish off their cat food at night. I have never lost any cats to skunks or racoons, only a few disappeared over the years they were usually small sized about 7 lbs cats. A few years ago, a fisher appeared on my porch!
I saw that it was ill and unstable on its feet, a few hours later I found it dead next to my house. I left it there because I wanted to show what a fisher looks like to a few folks who would be curious, they are a rare sight. When my cat went out he was just as ready to go back inside right after coming up to the dead fisher, this led me to believe he knew how dangerous those beasts are. We are getting more fishers around here, now I know what the strange screams we hear are: on Wikepedia they describe their screams as those of children or cats. Cats are really good at knowing how to stay safe. If you don't hear any such screams at night, that would mean you don't have many fishers where you are, hope so for your Bennet but even if some are around Bennet may come back. I did lose a cat a long time ago, one that didn't come back, I hope he was kidnapped by other folks and got to live a happy life but I will never know what happened to Coo, and I know it's an unnerving feeling, great big hugs to you, be kind to yourself.

Hi Toon.

Yes, the mind needs to grieve and start to 'forget' when a loved one dies. Yet I can not start that process, so each morning Bennett comes alive and I am back to square one. Sometimes I tell myself "ok, he's dead", but I am not convinced so it just doesn't work.

I looked at fisher cats on the internet, and man, they are one NASTY looking animal. We have them here in Vermont, but not in my close area which is more populated. But that doesn't mean Bennett didn't wander off into deeper wooded territory.

I made the choice to let Bennett live as an outdoor cat, and I don't regret it. When we adopted him as a kitten, he was already used to being outdoors as he was born on a farm. This is the risk you take.

That's how I felt about it too, my cats had a full life, they may have gotten to know that the outside world was a scary place but they also saw the skies full of stars at night,how big the world is and when they slept in the safety of their house they were so happy. if I were a cat, this is the life I would have chosen, no matter how it would end.