I still continue to struggle with the grief in having to euthanize my horse Serson. I only owned Serson for 10 months, but he was a long awaited dream come true for me. When I found Serson for sale on the internet I thought well why not go look at him. I drove for 45min. to look at the 19yr. Arab gelding, show champion it stated. I walked into the barn a called his name he turned his head a looked at me then back at the pasture. He was skinny, his ribs showed slightly but he was very polite he didn't mind me touching his face, ears or picking up his feet. So I got a friend to come see him he rode the horse and we talked about the age but also the fact that Serson did everything that was asked of him. I had already decided yes. He came off the trailer in a bound, my daughters eyes lit up when she watched him emerge. We spent our first day just grooming and enjoying the October sunshine. I contacting his original owner to see if the horse had any health isues, he was suprised to here the horse had been sold. I told him Serson was skinny but was starting to eat better that's when he told me he had sold Serson to a lady along with a mare because they had always been together. He felt Serson may have had grief over the loss of the mare as his companion. By December Serson had gained his weight back and his muscles were becoming toned. We had so much fun with him, he really had a wonderful personality like a big dog. He would shake for an apple or sugar cube. He taught us how to ride. In May we moved Serson to a barn closer to our home, with gas prices the 40min round trip drive was getting to be too much to do every day. It was great once he settled, grassy pastures a herd to spend his time with. We again decided to move Seron to another barn more of a western barn my daughter wanted to be with other riders she had more in common with so we moved Serson. He seemed to settle quickily but the morning of Aug. 15th I was called by the barn Serson had fallen ill the vet was already there and was returning back to the barn asap. My heart sank. I left work and hurried to see if I could help my friend. I was shaking when I saw him he was struggling to stay on his feet trying to drop and roll. The vet felt he had twisted his intestine.She recomended surgery an hour drive, she said the surgery would cost at least $2000 to $3000 and it would be unsure of the outcome. I just didn't have that kind of money. My husband said you can't sell your car. I asked her if there was anything else we could do and she said to bring him to the clinic, we'd try IV and pain meds. At one point Serson looked arround as if to ask "what are we doing here?" the vet even stated she was afraid to say so but she thought he looked alittle better. I was albe to stay with him for 3hrs while we tried what we could to help him and in between Iv bags I could walk him outside. Shortly before noon while outside he dropped to his knees and I had to let the vet euthanize him I couldn't see him struggle anymore. I'm sorry this is so long but I have to let this go I still cry for him so much. I don't know if I'll every come to terms with this it's been 5months and I still cry like it was yesterday. Hoping to let go of my sorrow.

mbrammer

I'm so sorry you lost Serson. He sounds wonderful. He was your dream come true, it's hard to let that go. Guilt is part of grief. You did your best for him and loved him enough to let him go.

I'm not sure it's possible to let go of your sorrow, it is possible to learn to live with it.

I have always wished I could be lucky enough to share my life with a horse. You were truly blessed with him.

Thinking of you, your family and Serson.

Thank you. I know that Serson was a blessing, and he helped me more than I think I helped him. It's funny how I could be upset or frustrated, then I would go to see my buddy and before I even finished grooming him I was already in a better mood. I really thought I would have him longer than I did. thanks for your support. Martha , Serson's mom


http://www.in-memory-of-pets.com/personalt...te.php?ID=64079

Your Serson was so beautiful and I'm so sorry you had to let him go like that. Its wonderful that you did have that time with him and you gave him a wonderful loving home for his last year of life.

Five months seems like such a long time but I know the hurt is just as fresh as if it had been yesterday you said goodbye.

Run fast and free over the rainbow bridge pretty Serson. Someday you will be together again with those who so loved you.