sigh,
its been three months since pooh has passed to the bridge. i cant believe it. its so lonely without feline feet in the house.
this friday it will be one month since kittens passing. i hope they are together.
i cry almost everyday. the pain and the hurt is still there. but its the loneliness that gets me. i turn corners in the house expecting to see them. curled up upon the couch together or sprawled out on my bed. waiting to be fed and meowing loudly if it was past the time to be fed(by minutes actually) i drove up the driveway the other day and half expected to see them lookin out the window for me to come in. but it is not to be. i miss them so much.

my older dog tee was wanting a belly rub today and i discovered a cyst or something under her tail i thought it was a tick or something. but it is not. needing to make an appt tomorrow to get it checked out.(she's 11) and praying that it is benign. i cant take another another lovey to go to the bridge. please pray that it is nothing.
the heartache continues...

Michelle,

I'm so sorry you're feeling as lonely as I am, too. It rips your guts out, I know, to still be expecting to see one's furbabies where they 'ought' to be. This is called "searching", in grief-lingo, btw, and can go on for a long time, even if you're grieving in a "healthy" way. It's brutal, though, and the let-down and shock we feel each time we re-realize our new reality takes a terrible and cu*mulative toll on our hearts, each and every time it happens....a repeated blow that never seems to end.

I, too, hope that Nissa and Sabin are together, at least most of the time, but even that's a continual worry...one never stops being a Mom.

I was just talking yesterday about the loneliness, too. It's like a break from the constant 'doing' and worrying for my Nis' in her last months...but it NEVER ENDS and I never, ever could stand being away from her for more than a few hours at a time. So now it's sheer torture that's been forced upon me w/o my consent!

I've already sent prayers for Tee and whatever that bump is and we'll all hope for the very best, and for a severely-needed break for you from the worry and sorrow! Take care and let us know what comes of it. You're in my thoughts, Michelle.

Michelle

It is strange just expecting our loves to be here curled up in their favorite spots. Today I heard one of the neighborhood cats meowing outside and for a second although I knew it was not Zack's meow I wished it was, wanting to come in from the cold.

I am sorry to hear of the "cyst" on your mans tail. Zack got a lump on his tail and it ended up being just a cyst. i hope this is the same for you guy.

Lots of love Jazmin

thank you for all your kind words..as i had said yestrday had been three months since poohbear went on to the bridge...however feeling down last night a moth flies out of no where into my bedroom. now pooh was the great moth catcher in our house even waiting by the door for one to sneak in at night..i took it as a sign from her that she is still around me...now i keep waiting for a sign from kitten..although she keeps coming to me in dreams..i guess thats her way of being near me?

I think however our pets come to us, in whatever form, after they've left, it can still be a comfort. I don't see many signs anymore, it's been almost a year exactly since Magic left and about six months since Groucho left, but I sit and talk to them every day. Somehow I know they're hearing me, I can't tell you how I know, I just do. I miss having the signs, and wonder what's wrong that they aren't apparent to me anymore, but I have the essence of my furry ones, and that's a blessing.

There's still moments of intense sadness. I was doing something last week, and happened to look up at a photo I have of Magic, and it all hit suddenly, and I was crying again as though she left yesterday. It totally caught me off-guard. I suppose I thought that I was past that, but I guess a part of me will never be "past that". We never really will be. We just have to go on muddling through. We may not even want to, but the others in our life deserve it, whether 2 or 4 legged.

Please let us know how Tee's appointment goes. She will be in my prayers also. Take care - Barbara

I am thinking of your baby and hoping for the best. Please let us know what the vet finds out.

I wish I had signs from my Boo Boo Kitty. But there haven't been any.

I haven't seen any signs from my Schtoobing yet either, and it's been almost 1 month since he died. At least I don't think I've seen any, and I think I would know.