Hello.
I just want to share something.

I really love my garden and throughout spring I was planting and landscaping getting all ready for summer.

On the 3rd June we had to let Taylor my beautiful bulldog go.
It has crushed me.
When we returned home I noticed that the first rose on my tree had opened and I was pretty angry about it. Nothing was beautiful anymore. My husband said it's Taylors rose.
I was pretty close to destroying my garden because it seemed obscene that it could start to flourish and look pretty when all I felt was despair.
As days passed I would glance at the rose not really admiring it but feeling it was a reminder.
The last few days the other roses have now opened. They are red. All red, except the first one which is fuscia in colour.
I rang my mum and asked her if roses on the same bush could be a different colour. She told me she didnt think so and had never seen it.

When my husband came home I showed him the rose and asked 'is that a different colour to the rest?' a reality check for me! He said 'yes..why'

I checked out the roses name and they are called 'love knots'.
I have now taken the rose before its petals fall and I am pressing the flower. I will frame it and name it 'Taylor's Rose'.

I asked for a sign that she is somewhere safe and happy. I think I received my sign in a slightly different manner than I was expecting.
When I thought that perhaps my girl sent me a rose I cried a bucket but as a cynic who desperately wants to believe, my strange rose is bringing some comfort.

I like to think she's telling me that she WILL be waiting at Rainbow Bridge.

Think of all those amazing reunions! Peace to you all.

What a beautiful experience .To those of us who believe in the afterlife, there is no doubt that your girl was trying to tell you that she is not only okay,but that she is in such a beautiful place! What a more beautiful way to send her message. After experiencing quite a bit of 'communication from the other side' (I'm not crazy, I promise!), I began to research it in every way I could. The one thing that has stuck with me the most was when I read (from John Edwards) that validation is the greatest gift we can give them. In other words, it takes so much energy for them to manifest things in our physical world, that if we don't validate those things for them, if we just shrug them off, it is painful and insulting to our loved ones (human and furbabies alike)! Even if you aren't sure about something, it doesn't hurt to say "Yes baby, mommy/daddy knows your here and loves you to"...just in case
Your friend in grief,
Kim

Hi everyone,

I read this topic with great interest, because from the day Guinness died I have been waiting for a sign. My mum died three years ago and I feel she has done some things for her children, has given us these "signs", and believe me, I am not very religious or with my head in the clouds - as they say over here - being brought up in a family of scientists. But I do believe there is something out there that keeps us in contact with the ones we love and that have passed away. If you listen to people who had to let someone dear go, you will find that most of them experience similar things as Taylors mum. I myself think the signs are always there, only we are not used to reading them anymore.

Here is my story, although it happened before my dog died.

I had to make the hardest choice to have Guinness put to sleep, he was old, he was ill, had problems with his equilibrium and probably had a tumor in his brain. But I kept postponing, which was possible through some heavy medicine. But one day he could no longer get up by himself and watching him so helpless and ill I could no longer bear it, so I called the vet.
He said he would be around after lunchtime. Up to that moment my dog had been lying on the floor for 4 hours, in the same position, staring around him with his one eye (he lost one eye when he was young) as if he did no longer recognize his surroundings. But at one moment, with my help, he managed to get up and went outside to drink. Seeing him walking I felt great doubt. Did I do the right thing?
It tore me up inside and I turned the question to my mum. As soon as I thought this, a big hawk came flying in our garden and landed on the fence post not even 2 metres away from Guinness. I had never seen this bird, let alone in our suburban neighbourhood where none of the sort reside. Furthermore, this was such a big bird, far bigger it seemed than the hawks that live in my country. I stared at it in amazement. It turned to look at Guinness, then flew away after maybe 30 sec.
And somehow that gave me comfort.
Later, after Guinness was gone and I was left devastated, I was desperately searching for something to comfort me. So I went to the library to look for a book on symbols. That led me to Egyptian symbols, where I found the hawk. With the ancient egyptians the hawk is the God of Heaven. And what is more, this god also had only one eye.

I will remember this all my life.
So Taylor's mum, cherish this rose you have, it is a beautifull sign and I am sure it was from Taylor.

Essy

Dear Taylorsmum and everyone else who believes in signs,

I would like to share the following email that I sent to several friends about a week and a half after I made the awful decision to euthanize my sweet Spike. Spike was a 14ish year-old Border Terrier who'd adopted me from a local shelter in 1992. We were told at the time that Spike was 1-2 years old, putting him at around 16 when he went to heaven. Here is the email.....

Dear friends,
I am sending this to people with whom I feel spiritually connected. Even if your belief about signs from beyond differs from mine, I know that you will appreciate and respect the experience I am about to describe.

Several years after my cousin Lynda, a total animal lover, went to heaven, I asked for and received a message from her about ET, a dear departed shelter dog. There was no doubt about the sign Lynda sent assuring me that little ET was with her. Ever since, whenever I or anyone close to me loses a pet, I ask Lynda to look after them.

You all know how much I loved my Spike and how much I miss him. After putting him to rest on May 23rd, I anxiously awaited word from Lynda but heard nothing...and I didn't want to "bother" her by asking for confirmation of what I should have already known. But still....

On Saturday, June 8, I awoke with as strong a feeling of sadness as the day we'd said good-bye to Spike. I began to cry and couldn't stop. This time I spoke directly to Spike, asking him to please let me know that he was alright.

On Sunday I opened an email from a friend who had forwarded a little movie called "The Best Day of My Life". I'd read the text before, but it was even more meaningful in this format.

Before leaving the site, I saw an option to view a list of other movies they offered. I clicked on the category called Life's Trials hoping to find something to shake the sadness and uncertainty I felt about Spike's wellbeing.

As I recall, there were at least ten titles in that section, but one stood out as if it were printed in neon. I clicked onto Letter from Heaven and got the sign I needed. I'd like to share it with you....

View this beautiful movie at
http://www.InspiringThots.net/movie/letter-heaven.php

Juanita,
That is sooo beautiful. I had to watch it twice because I cried so hard the first time I missed half of it...thank you for sharing.
Your friend in grief,
Kim

Kim
I know exactly what you mean. Would you believe that, even though I have shared it with others, I only watched Letter from Heaven the one time? I sobbed so violently that I, too, missed parts of it. I keep saying that I will create a special time to watch it again, but I just haven't been able to do so. Maybe today....
Juanita

Hi Kim....again,
I just read Sasha's incredible message to you and your reply to her on the tribute page. Did you write the Sasha portion or did you find it somewhere? It is absolutely beautiful. Of course, I'm crying my eyes out....so much for not watching Letter from Heaven because I'm afraid I'll cry!
Juanita

To everyone,
I just re-read my post containing the link to Letter from Heaven and realized my mistake regarding Spike's age. He was about 16 when he passed, and we'd been together for a little more than 14 years.
Juanita

That is absolutely beautifull, I'm crying my eyes out but I also feel that every word is true.

Essy

Essy,
I know, isn't it incredible? I figure that, even though Spike emailed "Letter..." to me, all of the other furbabies had a paw in writing it! I hope their message brings you peace and hope.
Juanita

Thanks Juanita,

It DID help!! It felt as if my Gynnie was talking to me, comforting me. It makes all of it just a bit less harder to bear. And it feels good to be able to cry like that, because that is really hard some times. And it indeed brought me some peace.
You're an angel for sharing this with us!

Isn't it great though, that our love for our furbabies and their love for us creates such a strong bond that it "overcomes" death! When I think of it like that I feel really blessed.

I'm sure that this will help a lot of people, so thank you again, Juanita, God bless you for your kindness.

Essy

Juanita,
Well, you sparked me to read it again as well and now I'm bawling like a baby, too. We are just a mess !
Actually, my best friend wrote the Sasha portion for me. She had been a part of our lives for many years and knew our bond very well. I was absolutely devastated after I had taken my Sasha's life, even if it was what was best for her, and I was having such a hard time functioning. I would literally cry to the point of becoming physically sick and even had thoughts of suicide. I just couldn't shake the feeling of wondering what Sasha must have been thinking as I held her while I allowed someone else to take her life. I turtured myself with thoughts of her thinking "What did I do?" or "I thought you loved me" ....{pause for a serious cry fest}....those thoughts are still very painful to think about . When my friend handed me that poem (sealed in an envelope) , she included a little personal note to me that said 'I wrote you a little something from Sasha. I know it is hard for you to accept, but it was her time to go, and that was clear when even I looked into her eyes. You not only did what was best for her, you gave her a special gift, and for your enormous courage she will be eternally grateful.' That poem changed my life. I obviously still struggle with the grief, there is no cure for that, but it certainly brought me out of that dark place I was in....I guess you could say it 'saved my life'. I have the original copy framed and hanging with Sasha's other pictures on the wall....it will always be very special to me....thank you for reading it and feeling the emotion that comes from it. I truly think it speaks for all of our furbabies who depended on us to release them from their old and worn bodies. Their souls are much to vibrant to be imprisoned like that...
Your friend in grief,
Kim

Hi Kim,

Yes, we are indeed "a mess", but aren't we lucky to have one another to share these sad but tender times with?

It would appear that you have been at least twice blessed. You have had both an extraordinary animal companion and an equally extraordinary best friend. That's more than many people get in a whole lifetime!

Thank you so much for sharing the story of how Tasha's message came to be written. Your friend's talent is exceeded only by her deep understanding of your bond with Tasha.

I can't tell you how much it means to me to have people like you in my cyberlife. Prior to Spike's becoming ill, I had no clue what a forum was, and I thought chat rooms were for perverts! Thank the Lord I was wrong. These communications with other people going through the same pain in "real time" has literally saved my emotional life.

It will be a month on Tuesday that we said good-bye to our sweet boy. I have cried more than once every day. Sharp memories of his last day still pierce my heart, and sometimes the pain still hits like a sledgehammer. But through it all, my only real comfort has come from sharing my grief with others who understand and honor it.

Juanita

Thank you so much for posting the link .I too, cried like a baby the first time and had to watch it twice to see what I missed the first time.It will be 6 weeks tomorrow that I had to send my sweet baby Emily to The Rainbow Bridge.
I have cried enough tears to flood a country in a drought.

Someday's I feel I can't go on.The mornings are the worst. I hate waking up and not seeing Emily sleeping in her bed next to ours. I feel so alone in my grief at times it's like nobody understands the pain and heartache that losing a furbaby can bring.

I hold her ashes, I cry, I apologize ,I talk to her and I try to understand but I don't. Nothing makes sense. I only know that it hurts.
It honestly feels like my heart has been ripped out. There is such a hole, an emptiness that goes so deep into my soul that I know I'll never be the same person I was before I lost Emily.

I can't find any pet loss support groups out here where I live and that's why I am so grateful for this site.
Thank you so much to everyone for understanding.

I would just like to say a big thankyou to everyone here.It has brought me some comfort and I am grateful to all those who have shared their feelings. I buried my darling cat near a rosebush that my daughter gave me for my birthday last year. I never thought I would be able to sit out there and look at it,but in the past few days the first rose has opened and I have been able to bear it and think of my dearest Taggy although of course I miss her so much.To quote, it honestly feels like my heart has been ripped out There is such a hole,an emptiness that goes so deep into my soul that I know I'll never be the same person that I was before I lost EmilyUnquote. I feel like that too . I am reading a book that I feel i was drawn to in the Library.It is not about pet bereavement as such but it is helping me to cope. . A few things have happened which I hav e taken as signs.I can be a cynic but desperately want to believe. Something that really struck me was what Kim R. said to release them from their old and worn bodies. Their souls are much too vibrant to be imprisoned like that. I lost my Mum when I was a young teenager and I thought I knew all about grief. Best Wishes

Thankyou all so much for your responses.

Juanita I watched the film, yes Im crying (again) but I have to just think of the reunion.

Ive actually become quite amazed at the amount of tears the body can produce.

We went to a beautiful place today that Taylor would have loved. I imagined her tagging along and even told her 'cmon then' so she could go infront. I even made room for her to pass. I dont believe Im crazy (yet) I just believe that if she can tag along for a trip out she will, it made it better having her with me.

Reading about others peoples signs makes the impossible more possible. I know which I'd rather believe.
We are so honoured really that as we loved them so very much they loved us right back. My tears may become fewer but my love for her will always remain.

This site really is a beacon when I feel Im losing myself. Just seeing that Im not alone. Thankyou all.

Dear Taylorsmum,

You may well be crazy, but it's not having Taylor tag along on today's trip that makes you so! Just teasing, my dear. Today was a very nostalgic day for me as well, and I felt that I might be crazy when I began to cry in the dairy aisle at the supermarket.

Everywhere I went today reminded me of Spike. When we were both younger and more more limber we used to walk everywhere. So today during my errands it seemed that every street corner, every house and every tree reminded me that Spike is no longer with me.

The supermarket itself is a minefield of memories. It is amazing how many departments I want to avoid because in one aisle I bought baby food for him, in another (dairy) the cream cheese to give him his pills...even the bakery where I would buy the sugar-free corn muffins he loved.

I think that, in time, reminders like these will generate a happy memory and a smile, but today all I felt was empty.

This site is indeed a haven. It always brings the comfort of knowing that others are feeling as I do. Thank you all for being there for me.

TO KIM: I apologize for calling your sweet Sasha Tasha a couple of posts ago. I was involved in the rescue of a dog named Tasha last year, and she's still in my mind sometimes.

Hi everyone
It's like one step forward 2 steps back.
I dreamt of my girl for the first time last night. First I had fallen asleep on the sofa (I never do that!), just before really waking up I dreamt that I woke up and looked over at the other sofa and there was my husband, my son and Taylor all fast asleep (something they do often!).
When I actually woke up I just started crying. Went upstairs to bed and dreamt of her all night long, just a mish mash of dreaming and waking. Really horrible.

When I woke up this morning I cried and been off and on all day. Cried in the garden centre, cried driving so its not only supermarkets! They couldn't find a price and by the time they had my eyes were streaming! Im too sad to be embarrassed.

To top it off my girls ashes came home finally today.
I seem to have two states at the moment, heartwrenching pain or numbness.
There were a couple of days I seemed to be making progress now I seem to have gone backwards.

I keep checking my Taylor rose against the others and when I do I seem to lift a bit because they are no way the same colour. I may be a doubting Thomas but I cant doubt what my eyes see. (I even took 2 petals from the other roses so that in the future when doubt creeps in.....) obviously someone knows me very well.

I guess amongst all this pain and so many tears I have something to hold onto.

Peace to you all

Dear Taylorsmum,

I'm no dream &%^yst but, as we have already established I definitely believe in signs. I think it's wonderful that your very first dream of Taylor showed her peaceful and surrounded by those who loved her. I'd like to think she was telling you that she is safe, serene and well tended.

I just wish you wouldn't be concerned about how many steps you are taking in either direction on some mythical "Grief Scale". I lost my precious Spike fully two weeks before you said good-bye to your Taylor, and I'm no further along on the scale than you. If anyone should feel badly about not making "progess" it would be me.

You know I'm not serious about all of that, of course, but why do we insist upon monitoring and grading ourselves on how quickly we can "get better"? We are hurting to the degree that we loved, and it will take however long it takes to come through it. I am saying this as much for myself as for anyone since my husband, who loved Spike as much as he could love anyone, is showing signs of impatience (the passive-aggressive kind!) at my rate of recovery. He commented as early as two weeks ago that he wondered whether my frequent visits to these support sites might be doing more harm than good. But, instead of telling him to MYOB, I began doubting myself. PLEASE let's not do that to ourselves.

I do remember having what I considered a setback in week three. I thought I was really on the road after the first two weeks, then KABOOM, it hit again like a ton of bricks. Of course, receiving Spike ashes, followed shortly thereafter by a plaster cast of his pawprint the vet had taken just after he died, were like arrows through my heart.

With regard to the crying episodes in public places...next time it happens, just mumble something that sounds like PMS or peri-menopausal, pre-menopausal, menopausal or post-menopausal. The men within earshot will do whatever you want just to get you out of there, and the women will understand!

Remember...a day, an hour or a minute at a time is all we have to get through.
Juanita

Dear friends,

The most amazing thing happened, similar to what Taylor'mum describes.
I had already read the story with the rose and found it comforting.
Now for several years I had been wanting to buy an old climbing rose called "Veilchenblau", but had never had the garden for it. Since we moved in October that had changed.
This year, before Guinny died, my boyfriend bought one of those climbing roses and we put it in our garden, close to the place where the dogs sleep/slept (our other dog still stays there of course). Now I had been impatient to watch what would happen, since I read that it was a very vigorous grower with loads of small violet to ashes colored flowers. Due to the weather it took ages for everything to start growing. When finally a but opened a few weeks ago the flower turned out to be white!!! My conclusion (even after reading this item) was to think that we had received the wrong rose. So imagine my surprise when all the other branches suddenly gave the right flowers this weekend. Even though I know all about oculation, I still felt it was a sign. In fact, our garden that was full of plants we did not know, has been flooded with white flowers of all sorts this last week.
It really comforts me. Like others explained here I asked my mum (who is death and who loved gardening) for advise, since there are difficult issues concerning the family as well and it made me sad and at a loss for answers. So yes, this is really something good, a sign that they are well and close to me.

I hope every one of you has a story like this in their hearts, even if it is rationally hard to accept sometimes.

Essy

Dear Essy,
I tried responding to your post last night, but I guess it didn't take. Thank you so much for sharing the beautiful story of the symbolic white rose and the other white flowers that have joined it in your garden. Those who are true believers say that the signs are all around us, all the time, if we are but open to them. I hope the miracles that several of us have shared here are the first of many signs from our sweet angels.
Juanita

I really love this thread on signs...

I haven't posted on this forum for months. It has been 10 months since my little Toffee (toy poodle) went to Heaven. Not a single day has gone by that hasn't left me thinking about him and missing him.

Oh, I have had so many amazing signs. Three months ago I was waiting in the van with my other dog while members of my family went in to reserve a house rental for the summer. I kept thinking about Toffee and feeling very sad. I wished I could see him. I wished I could hold him. I cried a little and fell asleep thinking about him. I must have been sleeping for 15 minutes.

For some reason, I woke up suddenly and looked out the window. A lady with a white poodle who was walking by in one direction, and another lady with a black toy poodle who was walking by in the other direction, came together and met right in front of the van. Poodles just naturally make me smile. I hooked the leash on my dog (who is a poodle) and we jumped out of the van to meet them. Just as we did, an older couple with another toy poodle was walking by behind the van! I was really amazed because here we are in the middle of a big, very empty state park on a Monday afternoon and suddenly I am awakened from sleep and see three different people walking by the van at the exact same moment and they each have a poodle!

If you saw how it looked like a ghost town before I fell asleep you would think it was a "sign" too. And after the poodles went on their way and we got back in the van, the park looked like a ghost town again.... no one was in sight.

My little angel is around and he knows how to make me smile.

I cried when I watched the movie (mentioned above). Yes, my little Toffee had a paw in writing it, too.

Hi AngelBaby,

Just loved your story of Poodles Popping Up in the Park...sounds like the title of a children's book.

I felt good knowing that, ten months after losing Toffee, you still have those tearful episodes. So many posts tell of people's impatience with themselves for '"still" crying after a few weeks or a month.

It is just one month since I said good-bye to my sweet Spike, souldog, best friend and constant companion of 14 years. I expect I'll still be crying for at least that long!

Juanita

I believe their spirits are with us.

It was hard for me to believe that at first. I thought I lost my Toffee forever and I couldn't believe in a story about a bridge if it wasn't true. But now I believe Toffee was very close to me through my long months of grieving, and visits to the doctor and emergency room (due to loss of appetite, heart pains, stomach pains). I believe his spirit stayed close while I was sleeping and he tried to heal my sadness. I had many dreams. They started out very disturbed but then became very peaceful.

I believe my other dog, Coco, could see his spirit. After Toffee was gone, Coco would stare off into space for the longest time like he was looking at something. I would call his name and he wouldn't hear me. He was so focused on what he was looking at - he almost looked like he was having a discussion with someone. Several times he would take on Toffee's behavior suddenly for a couple of minutes and then go back to his own personality again.

I still miss my little Toffee. And it seems like if I have a really sad day thinking about him and tears roll down my cheeks.... then something unusual happens, as if he wants to say, "don't worry, I'm still near."

I believe in fact, that during your grieving you my be closer to your baby then you've ever been before..

unconditional love

I would also like to mention that Coco never seemed to grieve for Toffee when he was gone. When I brought Toffee's body back from the vet, I showed him to Coco and Coco sniffed him and accepted that he was gone and laid down and went to sleep. They were very close - kindred spirits - but some how Coco wasn't upset, he seemed to just "know". Coco maintained his happy-go-lucky nature and stayed by my side everywhere I went. Things were just "as usual" with him, except for his staring at something that I couldn't see.

Dear Angelbaby,

Like you do, I have always believed that cats have such abilities, they see some things that we can not. But I never experienced it with dogs and that is why I think what you tell about Coco's behavior is even more exceptional.

Not so long ago I got a book from my sister written by Rupert Sheldrake, not exactly scientists favorite nr 1, but still, he tells some extraordinary stories. This one was called "The sense of being stared at" and it talks about strange behaviour with mostly cats and dogs, like that they always know when their people are coming home even though there is no way they could know this up front (he tested this scientifically!) Reading this I recognized a lot of things and realized once again that perhaps some (or all) species of animals might have special ways to communicate information to others without us humans being aware of it. Humans easily think that they are so great for having a spoken language and animals do not. Well, I - as a long time dog and cat owner - think that is just a lot of *****. Everyone who is close to an animal day in day out will know that they have very subtle body language, that animals often seem to exactly convey a certain message although we do not fully understand how. And surely the special long term bond between petowners and their furbabies is proof of this as well.
I for one realized only after Guinny died how easy our communication was, compared to the total inability to do the same with our other dog. As if she talks Russian to me. So much of it is unconsiously, but it is there just the same.

There is so much more "between heaven and earth" and we could learn a great many things about such communication. I for one am a believer, although I am by nature a down to earth person. My Guinny was the living proof of that.

I agree. I work a night shift and get home at 11:00pm. It only takes me 5 minutes to drive home.

Often when I approached the front door I would sneak up the stairs and peak in the window first and see Coco and Toffee eagerly standing side by side, looking at the door, and waiting for me. (Toffee was deaf.)