Six months ago, I let you go
the pain is colder than mountain snow
There were times I felt O.K.
but missing you gets worse by the day
I pray that God will send you home
I wait everyday but you never come
My heart has changed since you've been gone
I've become so weak, I used to be strong
Without you, my heart aches
I sit here and count the days
Since I last looked into your eyes
touched your fur, heard your cry
The truth is, I don't want to be
in life without you, it's misery
Our loving bond will never die
but since you have, I have cried
Every day, it never ends
you were my love, you were my friend
If you're somewhere and hear my plea
please find your way back to me
The love I gave to you before
next time, I promise, I’d give you more
However numbered my days may be
there will never be another you and me
I think that the saddest part
is having to live with this hole in my heart
Because I believe you’re now at peace
and now I wait for that release
From this life now filled with pain
to be with you once again

mos mommy- i love you . i feel as you do. life is not worth living now for me either , without my baby bear, and to never wake up would be merciful, but a loving person as i can feel that you are could never take the easy way out because no matter what the situation, the pain you would cause your loved ones is something you would not want to be responsible for and the repercussions of and pain caused when you are at rest is something you would want no one else to feel. you are a very strong soul to have made 6 months ! continue on your solo journey until you and your Cosmo can do it together again. a few years ago i lost 2 beloved cats-muffin age 18 and joey age 17. for a while i didn't want to REPLACE them and get aanother cat, but that christmas i got myself (my wife helped) josie; and without her feline peculiarities , i can't see how i am still suviving. she helped me to continue in my babies' love although they are different in many ways, i love them the same . josie is no relacement for my treasured companions i had for most of my adult life, but the love shared between me and my kittys is continued on in my liite girl, josie. my dog bear adopted my josie and if anyone is as confused as i am , it is she. they were bosum buddies ! they slept together, played together ( you probably will never get to see a 90lb. black lab and a little kitten play as they did) , and she would grab his face and wash him every day around noon when we awoke. keep enduring (that's all it really is -it isn't really living) and i wish you peace if it is at all possible. ron in pa

ps. had this note finished but wanted to re-read it before i sent it. had to walk up the road to look for my wife as she was returning from work and we presently have no car. i live in a country environment and traffic was coming both ways. it is night here and the road is not well lit. i stepped of the road so i would not get hit and there was a medium size , white dog dying there. i stayed there to comfort her- sang to her and petted her until i knew she was dead. she had a collar, but no tags. i must have knocked on 15 or so doors looking for her mommy or daddy with no luck.
i told her to tell my bear bear his daddy wished that he could have been there to comfort and hold him to the end , cried again,told him about the rainbow bridge and now that i am getting too wordy i am going to send this to you. keep the faith !

Mo's Mommy and Bearbear ~

The poem is so on target for me ~ and the remarks and also the post script from Bearbear ~ It fills my heart with compassion and comfort to know others understand how I am feeling ~

I go in the door at night to nothing ~ I drive home at night for nothing ~

I am an empty shell walking in my own home ~

I can comfort others but lack the ability to find meaning and comfort for myself ~

I am at work now however I will post a poem I wrote later in the week it will show how I feel ~ I appreciate and love you both for sharing your hearts

My prayer and vision is that St Francis has gathered up the white dog and into the arms of heaven they have gone

Peace and Blessings ~ Kathryn

To all of you, I know how much it hurts. But think if the situation were reversed and you were looking down on your furbaby mourning and giving up on life, it would make you miserable. I'm sure our lost loved ones don't want us to be miserable, they want us to live. Every so often I get teary eyed and dive into the kleenix box and then I picture them looking at me sadly and I try to shake it off, think of the happy times and focus on that. Years and years ago when I was quite little, I remember seeing an episode of Little House on the Prairie and it was a mother dying of cancer she left children behind and at her funeral she left a letter and it read something like this. "remember me with smiles and laughter for that's the way I'll remember you, if you can only remember me with tears then don't remember me at all." It's true you wouldn't want someone to cry everytime they thought of you, you'd want them to focus on the love and the laughter that you shared, the life - not the death.
We may have lost their physical furry bodys but the spirit is still alive as is the love.

While it may be true that remembering a loved one with tears is not a good way to honor them, it is also true that missing them is a source of overwhelming sadness. If I had wanted to give up on life, I would have. Just because I look forward to the day my Lord calls me home to be with my babies again, doesn't mean I will do anything to make it happen before it's time.
I do remember that episode of Little House on the Prairie, it is called Remember Me, and I actually have it on tape. The lines are, " Remember me with smiles and laughter, for that's how I'll remember you all, if you can only remember me with tears, then don't remember me at all." While I do cry for Cosmo to be here with me, I also smile at the memories he left me with, it's a 2 way street. Just because our lost loved ones do not want us to be sad, doesn't make it go away. When Cosmo first passed, I worried that my sadness would keep him from peace, but now I feel he is at peace no matter how I feel. I can't help the fact that I miss him terribly and I want him back. No new personality, human or animal, can replace the ones we've lost, and that is why I am having such a hard time. Just knowing that his unique beautiful body and spirit, are not mine anymore, they belong to the heavens, and I am selfish and do not want to share.
My feelings go up and down everyday, smiling at the thought of him being here with me as he once was, and crying that I can't hold him anymore.
What is one to do except go on, and hold on to the hopes and thoughts of the day we will be reunited.