My Cat Was Killed Today

I am sitting here, a grown man, with tears dropping onto my clothes, because the light has gone out of my life. My beautiful little cat, my own love for 11 years, my Chance, was killed by a stray dog in the street outside my house this morning. She was dead before I could get outside. I brought her inside and laid her on the couch, she spasmed a little, but she was already gone. I buried her in the woods across the road from my house a little while later.

This is the worst I have ever felt. My friends are being very kind, but I don't know how it'll be when I go out of my door again. I live alone, but I never felt lonely when my Chance was with me. Now I am understanding loneliness. It's very early, but I feel so bad. Not guilty, not angry, just sad. I don't think grieving is wrong, but I wasn't ready for this. My house is empty and still. It seems unfamiliar. I feel unbalanced, uncentred, I feel like a stranger in my own skin. I can imagine no comfort.

Thanks for reading this, and thanks to whoever for the site.

h