Miranda Is Gone

I am so grateful I found this site. Thank you for giving me a place to unload my grief for a little while. People try to comfort me but no one seems to comprehend how sad this is for me.
Miranda was euthanized yesterday morning. She was almost 14 years old and was starting to show signs of aging. She was uncomfortable and she just wasn't herself anymore. Of course there were good days but the unpredictability of her moods and pain level made it too risky to keep her around my 3 year old daughter. I made the decision and I think I made the right choice.
I cannot believe how deeply it hurts. I miss her for so many reasons. She made me laugh and kept me company unconditionally. She soaked up so many of my tears over the years and went through so many ups and downs with me. When I got her at 8 weeks old she was infested with fleas and the vet said she would die. For three days I combed and killed fleas and just kept telling her she would be ok. I knew from that day on that we would forever be friends. We both needed each other so much and I loved her so much. I just cry so much and I don't know how to stop. I want her back even just for one more day. I don't know what to do without her. It's hardest at night because she used to snuggle with me and keep me company when I had insomnia. I miss her soft black fur that was as shiny as patent leather. I miss her gorgeous green eyes. I miss her purring and other little squeaks. I just miss my one of a kind, irreplaceable friend.