I Just Joined... I Just Lost My Sweet Pea, Doug

I am in shock I guess. He played with me this morning, though I noticed some limping. He was a French Bulldog, and they have back problems pretty often I guess.

After a few hours, he was yelping when I touched him! I took him to the vet, he was fine, the vet couldn't find anything. When I got there to pick him up, he was yelping again. I made plans to bring him in tomorrow. Took him home, he was acting very strangely- like he was confused, didn't want to go inside. It breaks my heart to even think about it.

I took him to the emergency vet. Had to go to work for a few hours, which frankly sucked. When I got back, he had just passed- he was in distress from the pain and they were trying to sedate him. They gave him steroids, noting helped his mouth- it was getting more and more swollen. Couldn't get the tube in his throat! He was choking to death, and it kills me. They had to knock him out, then he stopped breathing.

I don't know how to say good bye to him. I was with his body and just cried and cried. I feel awful that I wasn't there at his terrible time of distress! Why is what I keep asking over and over.

I have a cat who keeps going to the door, looking for Doug. He's in my lap now, which is weird for him, he is not a lap cat. But he's being so sweet and supportive now. I appreciate this board- I just had to vent and write it out.

Doug was a total, complete love bug. Snuggled with me every night, always greeted me with his special snorting way, loved to run around with me. I am lost, he was such an immense force in my life.