My Danny Boy Is Gone, post about my cat Danny's death Options

[moon_beam]

Hi, DannysMom, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing, and your treasured memories of your beloved Danny. I know how much you miss his sweet precious physical presence.

Clinical professionals recognize that the holidays can be challenging - - especially during the first year grief adjustment journey. DannysMom, it is important that you do whatever you are comfortable doing. For example, I do not decorate the house anymore - - but I do have a 4 foot artificial tree in the corner with lights and some clear plastic angels and brass bells with clappers that is up all the time. Occasionally Noah likes to go up to the tree and swat at the bells to make them jingle - - and THIS is what brings joy and comfort to my heart now. You and your precious Mindy and Shelley will discover what brings comfort and joy to YOU - - in your own way and in your own time.

DannysMom, thank you so much for honoring us by sharing your beloved Danny with us. I hope today is treating you and your precious Mindy and Shelley kindly, and that each of you will have a very peaceful, blissful, and cozy evening. I thank you for the blessing of your friendship, DannysMom, and of your precious Mindy and Shelley. Please know you and your precious girls are in my thoughts and prayers, and that I always look forward to sharing your news and your treasured memories of your beloved Danny and Tina.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

[xxForeverxx]

Hi DannysMom

I can understand how you do not want to put a christmas tree up yet. You could do it eventually in his memory though? I am sure he would love for you to show the other two just how wonderful it is and how much fun you and Danny had together putting it up. I know it is hard and of course there will be tears but if Mindy and Shelley enjoy it as much then that will make you smile too.

Danny really was a special cat and no matter what there will always be a part of him with you.

Here is a little poem I found which I think says it all really. It made me cry but it is so true and I wanted to share it with you.

And God asked the feline spirit
Are you ready to come home?
Oh, yes, quite so, replied the precious soul
And, as a cat, you know I am most able
To decide anything for myself.

Are you coming then? asked God.
Soon, replied the whiskered angel
But I must come slowly
For my human friends are troubled
For you see, they need me, quite certainly.

But don't they understand? asked God
That you'll never leave them?
That your souls are intertwined. For all eternity?
That nothing is created or destroyed?
It just is....forever and ever and ever.

Eventually they will understand,
Replied the glorious cat
For I will whisper into their hearts
That I am always with them
I just am....forever and ever and ever.

xxForeverxx

[DannysMom]

moon_beam and xxForeverxx, thank you as always for your kind words and support. It means so much to me.

xxForeverxx, thank you very much for this poem. It was comforting for me to read it. This will be a rough holiday for me. I can't think of last Christmas without crying, how I sat in the emergency room being subjected to a Christmas movie on TV while my heart was aching. It seemed to obscene to watch these scenes of happiness as I was crying and expecting bad news.

I think I may put up the Christmas tree next weekend. I do have a real nice one, 6 1/2 foot with multi-colored lights. It would be a good way to honor Danny as he always loved Christmas so much. It was his favorite holiday, and he loved that little doll angel that I always put on the couch next to his blanket. My life changed profoundly after Danny died. His death changed me in many ways. But I am so glad that I had him in my life for over 10 years. I just wished I hadn't always been so busy with work and school.

I used to take little naps on the bed with Danny. I would just lay there next to him and close my eyes for 10 or 15 minutes. His loving and quiet presence meant so much to me. Some Christmases I would read the Christmas story from the Bible to Tina and Danny and they would just sit there and listen quietly. He was such a wonderful cat in so many ways, very loving and sweet.

[moon_beam]

Hi, DannysMom, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing, and your treasured memories of your beloved Danny and Tina. Sometimes the things that we think may cause us sorrow may turn out to be very comforting instead - - such as putting up the Christmas tree in honor of your beloved Danny. Although he is not physically with you, his sweet Living Spirit continues to enjoy the "traditions" you shared together during his earthly journey. The most important thing is for you to do what YOU feel comfortable doing. Remember, if the tree becomes too much for you have up, then you can always take it down again.

I know what it is like to not look forward to the "festive" holidays after experiencing a traumatic event, as you experienced last Christmas with your beloved Danny. Perhaps if you feel up to reading the Christmas Scripture to your precious Mindy and Shelley this year you can do so knowing that your beloved Danny and Tina are also listening intently to every word you read and the sweet sound of your voice.

DannysMom, thank you always for honoring us by sharing your beloved Danny with us. I hope today is treating you and your precious Mindy and Shelley kindly, and that each of you will have a very peaceful, blissful, and cozy evening. I thank you for the blessing of your friendship, DannysMom, and of your precious Mindy and Shelley. Please know you and your precious girls are in my thoughts and prayers, and that I always look forward to sharing your news and your treasured memories of your beloved Danny and Tina.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

[moon_beam]

Hi, DannysMom, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing, and your treasured memories of your beloved Danny and Tina. Sometimes the things that we think may cause us sorrow may turn out to be very comforting instead - - such as putting up the Christmas tree in honor of your beloved Danny. Although he is not physically with you, his sweet Living Spirit continues to enjoy the "traditions" you shared together during his earthly journey. The most important thing is for you to do what YOU feel comfortable doing. Remember, if the tree becomes too much for you have up, then you can always take it down again.

I know what it is like to not look forward to the "festive" holidays after experiencing a traumatic event, as you experienced last Christmas with your beloved Danny. Perhaps if you feel up to reading the Christmas Scripture to your precious Mindy and Shelley this year you can do so knowing that your beloved Danny and Tina are also listening intently to every word you read and the sweet sound of your voice.

DannysMom, thank you always for honoring us by sharing your beloved Danny with us. I hope today is treating you and your precious Mindy and Shelley kindly, and that each of you will have a very peaceful, blissful, and cozy evening. I thank you for the blessing of your friendship, DannysMom, and of your precious Mindy and Shelley. Please know you and your precious girls are in my thoughts and prayers, and that I always look forward to sharing your news and your treasured memories of your beloved Danny and Tina.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

[sher_mark]

Dear DannysMom,
I know your sadness about the holidays. Danny and Tina were (are) truly loved. I'm sending good thoughts your way now and will think of you this Christmas too. Take care friend.

[DannysMom]

Dear moon_beam, thank you for your kind words. I think once I put up the tree I will probably leave it up. It just takes too long to put it up and decorate it, and I'm particular about how it looks. I know it will be a bittersweet Christmas as my dear Danny boy will not be here to celebrate it with me. I did go to the pet cemetery open house on Sunday, and the volunteers made some mini Christmas wreath ornaments and wrote Tina and Danny's name on each. That was so precious! Danny's wreath has a green strip of fabric with his name on it as green was always his color. Tina's is red.

I will hang those on the tree so my two sweet friends can be remembered and honored. The wreaths on their graves still look good despite the rain that we had.

[DannysMom]

Dear DannysMom,
I know your sadness about the holidays. Danny and Tina were (are) truly loved. I'm sending good thoughts your way now and will think of you this Christmas too. Take care friend.

Dear sher_mark, thank you so much for thinking of me. It is truly appreciated. Mr. Danny and Miss Tina were my best friends, and I will always cherish their memory. These little fur-covered angels give us so much love and bring so much joy into our lives.

[moon_beam]

Hi, DannysMom, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing. I'm so glad that you were able to go to the open house on Sunday. How special that the caretakers gave you mini wreaths with your beloved Danny's and Tina's names on them. I know you will treasure these gifts always, and that they will have special places of honor on your tree.

I hope today is treating you and your precious Mindy and Shelley kindly, DannysMom, and that you and your precious girls will have a very peaceful evening blessed with your beloved Danny's and Tina's sweet Living Spirits to comfort you. Please know you and your precious girls are in my thoughts and prayers, and that I always look forward to knowing how you're doing and to sharing your treasured memories of your beloved Danny and Tina.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

[Pippin's Mom Kel]

Danny's Mom, I just wanted you to know I was thinking of you. I had a rough day yesterday missing Pippin while I was putting up my Christmas decorations, so naturally my thoughts strayed to you, Danny and Tina. I read the cards that the vets/techs sent us after Pippin died, and one said something that makes me cry, but is so beautiful:

"... Grieve not, nor speak of me with tears,
but laugh and talk of me as if I were beside you...
I loved you so...
'Twas heaven here with you."
- Isla Paschal Richardson

[DannysMom]

Dear moon_beam, thank you as always for your support. I don't know where I'd be without it. Having this board to come to and "talk" to people who love their animal companions just as much as I do just helps so much going through the grief journey.

Kel, thank you as well for your steady support and kind words. We each have lost a very special Tuxedo boy. I can so well understand how reading the cards from the vet/techs made you cry. That was so thoughtful of them. I"m planning on putting my tree up tomorrow, but every time I look at Christmas decorations in the stores I feel the tears coming on. 2011 was Danny's last Christmas and he couldn't even enjoy it much as he was so sick. I remember how intensely I missed him when he was at the emergency hospital for a few days. That first night without him was horrible. I kept looking for him, expecting to see him on the bed or on the couch. It will be a tough Christmas for both of us.

[xxForeverxx]

Hi DannysMom

I am glad you are going to put a tree up. Danny will be up there hoping you will and it is a great way to honor him. You never know Tina and Danny's ways may have gone to Mindy and Shelley and they may argue over who gets to sit under the tree!

Those xmas decorations with their names on sound lovely. What a great thing to do for them. What was Danny like with the baubles on the xmas tree? Did they manage to stay on the whole time it was up!

I know how hard this is going to be for you but we will be here for you, as well as Shelley and Mindy and of course Danny and Tina too will be looking out for you from where they are.

xxForeverxx

[moon_beam]

Hi, DannysMom, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing. I can so relate to how you're feeling about the days this time last year when your beloved Danny was so ill when you share with us: "I"m planning on putting my tree up tomorrow, but every time I look at Christmas decorations in the stores I feel the tears coming on. 2011 was Danny's last Christmas and he couldn't even enjoy it much as he was so sick. I remember how intensely I missed him when he was at the emergency hospital for a few days. That first night without him was horrible." When our precious companions are with us it is so very hard for us to imagine our lives without them. And then when the painful reality begins to appear that our earthly journey with them is drawing to a close we measure every moment forward by how things "used to be" with them by our side.

It is important that you do what is helpful for YOU, DannysMom -- particularly during these "festive days." Remember - - when / if you do put up your tree and if it becomes too difficult for you to handle you can ALWAYS take it down. There are no "have to's" or "should's" that you are compelled to comply with. Your beloved Danny's and Tina's sweet Living Spirits are with you forever. You and your precious Mindy and Shelley will develop your own special ways of celebrating important and special events.

As always, DannysMom, I hope today is treating you and your precious Mindy and Shelley kindly, and that you and your precious girls will have a very peaceful evening blessed with your beloved Danny's and Tina's sweet Living Spirits to comfort you. Please know you and your precious girls are in my thoughts and prayers, and that I always look forward to knowing how you're doing and to sharing your treasured memories of your beloved Danny and Tina.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

[DannysMom]

Dear moon_beam, thank you for your suggestions and your support. I did put up the tree on Sunday, but I had a mini-breakdown as I got the tree skirt out of the box. Danny had laid down on it Christmas Day, and when I held it all the memories of that day came flooding back and I just had to cry and couldn't stop. Shelley and Mindy got real quiet and confused as they saw me cry. Shelley even hid under the bed, and Mindy stayed in the other room the entire time that I put up the tree. I was by myself with the memories of my sweet Danny boy. It was so painful for me putting up the tree and decorating it. My heart was aching and I just wanted to give up.

xxForeverxx, thank you for your comments. My Danny boy was always very good with the Christmas tree. He left the ornaments alone and just enjoyed sleeping under the tree. Danny was always so well behaved and listened when I told him no. He was such an intelligent little kitty boy. How I wish I could hear his sweet melodious voice again. His voice had a higher pitch than Tina's, and he just made the sweetest sounds. I put up his special Christmas angel doll next to the blanket he loved to sleep on. My heart aches looking at the blanket and not seeing him there. I always loved watching him nap and seeing his whiskers and paws twitch.

[DannysMom]

This has been such a tough week for me. It brought back memories of last year. At work, we had workers do something on the roof and I could hear them trampling and running around up there. It brought back the bad memories of the same time last year when we had roofers here at home and it stressed out Danny so much. They didn't finish the roof in one day and it took them three days to do it. They just were too busy singing and dancing around up there. I think had they hired American workers instead of these people who spoke nothing but Spanish and are probably here illegally it would have been finished much sooner. I just got so angry when I heard the people on the roof this week.

I kept thinking about how it stressed out my Danny so much and probably contributed to his heart failure. He was always such a sensitive cat and didn't like loud noises. When I saw the beautiful pink sunset tonight I just broke down and cried and thought of Danny. He couldn't even enjoy last Christmas, he was already so sick and had spent most of Christmas Eve hiding under my desk. He finally came out and laid down on the tree skirt under the tree. I miss my little boy so much this Christmas. I was not ready to lose him. I was dealing with so much and he was my comfort and joy. Losing him just tore me apart.

It was so hard for me to keep a straight face at our work Christmas get-together this afternoon. Most of my co-workers are men and and I suspect do not like cats. They're too infatuated with their iPhones and iPads and what not. They couldn't possibly understand how much Danny meant to me and how precious he was. Danny had a heart of gold and was so loving and gentle. It breaks my heart that he is not with me this Christmas.


This is where he used to sit in the mornings. He loved having that little Christmas angel doll right there with him.

[moon_beam]

Hi, DannysMom, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing. Sights, sounds, smells - - they are well known to be triggers of memories - - be they good or painful. I can understand how upsetting listening to roofers can be, and I am so sorry that the roof work last year may have stressed your beloved Danny which could have contributed to heart failure. So I can perfectly understand how having to listen to the roofers at work would be a source of painful memory for you.

I do know how this Christmas is one of mixed emotions for you - - the deep sorrow of not having your beloved Danny physically with you while embracing the joy of having your precious Mindy and Shelley to share a "first Christmas" together. This picture of your beloved Danny is so adorable with his Christmas angel. He is a handsome boy, and you are blessed to be his Forever Mom - - to be the privileged one to share his eternal love.

DannysMom, I hope today is treating you and your precious Mindy and Shelley kindly, and that you and your precious girls will have a very peaceful evening blessed with your beloved Danny's and Tina's sweet Living Spirits to comfort you. Please know you and your precious girls are in my thoughts and prayers, and that I always look forward to knowing how you're doing and to sharing your treasured memories of your beloved Danny and Tina.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

[DannysMom]

Merry Christmas, my sweet Danny boy. You are gone, but not forgotten. I feel so guilty about trying to enjoy this Christmas with Mindy and Shelley. I miss you so very much today. Your last Christmas was so painful for you. I remember how you were hiding under my desk all day, purring all the time. I tried to lift you out, but you wanted to stay there. I tried to make you feel better by playing your favorite Christmas CDs. I did not know I would lose you just a few days later. It broke my heart to have to let you go. You were my sweet, gentle Danny boy, and I always looked forward to coming home to you. Today you'll be celebrating Christmas with Tina in heaven, and you got the real angels there instead of your little Christmas doll angel. Last Christmas was the worst one I have had.

I remember your first Christmas with me, in 2001. You were still a kitten then, just 9 months old, and so full of life. Christmas was always better for me, because you were there.

[moon_beam]

Hi, DannysMom, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing, and your beautiful love letter to your beloved Danny. I'm smiling at his picture lying under the tree - - the expression on his face is so sweet - - he knows he is eternally loved.

DannysMom, I know how much your heart and arms ache to have your beloved Danny, and Tina, to physically hold again - - and how sometimes the memories we do have to treasure can feel so empty because of the physical separation. Still I hope somehow in some way you will feel your beloved Danny's sweet Living Spirit with you to comfort you through these days.

I hope today is treating you and your precious Mindy and Shelley kindly, my friend, and that you and your precious girls will have a very peaceful evening blessed with your beloved Danny's and Tina's sweet Living Spirits to comfort you. Please know you and your precious girls are in my thoughts and prayers, and that I look forward to knowing how you're doing and to sharing your treasured memories of your beloved Danny and Tina.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

[DannysMom]

Moon_beam, thank you for your words of comfort. Today was such a hard day for me. Just a minute ago they were playing the song "Danny boy" on the radio and I couldn't help but crying. I miss him so much today. I have been irritable today, irritable and sad, trying so hard not to cry at work and to keep a smile on my face. I felt so empty when I drove home tonight. I remembered how I visited Danny at the emergency vet last year this day. I couldn't wait to get there. My heart longed to see him like nothing else. They brought him into a room wrapped in a heavy blanket and he looked so sad and ill. I have never seen him so sad and dejected. They left some food and water for me to try to give to him, but he wouldn't take it. He couldn't even lift up his head, he was so sick. I knelt down in front of him and just cried an cried and stroked his soft fur. It hurt me to see him so sick. I would have given anything to make him well. The memories of that day are just overwhelming me today and I am having a hard time coping.

It broke my heart when Danny died and it's like I'm going through it all over again.

[moon_beam]

Hi, DannysMom, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing. I can so understand how you're feeling about the song "Danny Boy" playing on the radio and how it intensified your grief for your beloved Danny. It is very understandable how painful the "angel-versary" of visiting your beloved Danny in the hospital was, and remembering how so very sick he was. I do know how heavy your heart is not having your beloved Danny's sweet precious physical presence with you. Time is not necessarily "healing," but it does provide us the opportunity to eventually adjust to the painful "new reality" that comes when our companions precede us to the angels. I know how much you love your beloved Danny, and I know that as much as you want to hold him again that you are also thankful that he is no longer suffering in his physical body. And I know your beloved Danny is softly whispering into your heart, "it's okay, mom - - all is well - - I am still with you always and forever."

I hope today is treating you and your precious Mindy and Shelley kindly, my friend, and that you and your precious girls will have a very peaceful evening blessed with your beloved Danny's and Tina's sweet Living Spirits to comfort you. Please know you and your precious girls are in my thoughts and prayers, and that I look forward to knowing how you're doing and to sharing your treasured memories of your beloved Danny and Tina.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam