My Dog Cowboy Options

[leejaye]

Dear Cowboy, The adoption event sounds great - I can't come up with any better words than Moon_Beam has already shared with you, all i can say is no new fur child is a replacement, but you sound like you already know this too! I love my new little Purszival cat but I still get the "tears from nowhere" about Mischief, I'll be cruising along fine and then bang! there it is again, half the time I don't even know why...please let us know how you go with Chico, I really hope today is easier for you, Leejaye

[cowboy]

Thanks yall. Im feeling a bit more confident than I have the last two weeks and I think it is coming from the hope of having a new friend. Yeah leejaye i was going to write on your other post about how cute purzi is. Thanks moonbeam and raerae. Yeah Rae I didnt get emotional until I was actually there and chico just jumped up in his cage as soon as I walked over and he looked at me with his eyes like he was saying "hey are you my new friend." That was the point i started losing it. Ive decided I want him to come home with me but I havent decided whether its fair to him yet or not. And thats more important to me than my being happy. I was just thinking of a book ive listened to on audio several times called starship troopers. Yeah its what the movie was based on but its a completely different story. I was remembering a part where the main character was talking to a psychologist about where they were going to place him in the military and one of his choices was with the dogs brigade. i cant remember the exact words used so this isnt a direct quote from the book. But the psychologist starts explaining about what the dogs actually were, they were a bit more intelligent than a normal breed, and was asking him about his experience with his dog. well the part i was really remembering was the doctor explained that the bond between the man and dog was so that when the man died the dog was put down immediately because he would go insane and when the dog died that it would be better to put the man down. they instead would put him into psychiatric help until he had recovered. The doctor then explained he new first hand because thats what he originally did in the military. I was just thinking about how we all have similar bonds to our furry friends. How it feels like i had lost my mind the whole first week cowboy was gone. well i just wanted to share that thought. I hope it made sense like i said im not much of a writer. But I was already a big fan of the book I think it just got a little better after thinking of that. well I need to try to get some sleep so i hope everyone has a peaceful night and we all have a good week.

[Kristina]

Oh Cowboy

I was so pleased to come in here and see that you are thinking about adopting a new fur kid. I have two applications out for two different girls for our family, so I know how you are feeling. At first I felt I was being disloyal to Dixie, but when I really thought about it, I knew she would be pleased that mom was saving another life, that another sweet girl would live a fantastic life with me as her mom, just as Dixie did.

And typing that made me cry.

However, we are not being disloyal, nor are we replacing our babies. You and I and everyone here knows that they would want us to be happy. That we have so much love to give, it is only natural to bring a new family member home. As moonbeam says, our dogs are guiding us to our new furkid. We will know when we have found the right one, because of them.

Have you been in contact with the rescue about a trial period? I know many rescues that do it, to make sure it is right for everyone. I hope things work out the way you want them to. I have been thinking about you a lot.

Sending all my love to you my friend, I hope your week is a good one. Know your sweet Cowboy is watching you all the time.

[raerae777]

Hi Cowboy,

Just checking up on you and seeing how things are going. Any news on Chico? I hope you are having a peaceful week.

Much love.

Cinder's Mama

[cowboy]

Hey all thanks for checking in rae. I havent talked to chicos mom since sunday. My parents are coming to visit this weekend so i wont be able to have him come and visit but i plan on setting up something next weekend. I hope hes still available and i havent heard anything from his mom so im hopeful. next weekend will be almost 4 weeks. I still havent gotten to the point where i feel i can focus. I still have some emotional yo yo'ing that i cant get under control. I still get angry over small things that shouldnt matter. I hope by next weekend to have a better grip on it. I go to chicos page on petfinder everyday to look at the pic. If you want to check it out go to petfinder and put in dog, male, and small in the left search bar boxes and hes on the third page. theres another chico so hes actually the second entry. Again thanks everyone.

[moon_beam]

"I still havent gotten to the point where i feel i can focus. I still have some emotional yo yo'ing that i cant get under control. I still get angry over small things that shouldnt matter. I hope by next weekend to have a better grip on it."

Hi, cowboy, just getting caught up with how you're doing. What you are experiencing with the "emotional yo yo" is very normal in this early stage of deep grief. This grief roller coaster ride really puts our emotions into high gear as well as making them very unpredictable. It takes awhile before we really begin to feel that we have a "grip" on things again. So, please don't pressure yourself into thinking that it's been four weeks, six weeks, 2 months - - etc., -- and thus and so "should be" like this or "should not be" like this. This grief journey is not a straight line by any strethch of the imagination - - it is more like The Beatles' "Long and Winding Road" and sometimes feeling like we're getting absolutely NOWHERE in the process. But I assure you, cowboy, that one day - - when it may be truly unexpected - - you will notice that you're feeling more like "you" again - - when the mind seems clearer and the "buttons" are not quite so quick to put you into "overload". Just take this journey one day at a time.

I hope your visit with your parents goes well, and that things work out with little Chico. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, cowboy, and look forward to knowing how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

[cowboy]

Well the weekend wasnt too bad with my parents but i did notice i kept snapping at them. I apologized too them for it but it just shows how much further I have to go. Ive decided that until I can go a day or so without getting angry about everything I do not need to get a new companion that might upset me without meaning to. Luckily im not violent but it wouldnt be fair if he pees on something because he doesnt know better and i get angry with him instead of using it as a teaching moment. Im going to look into sponsoring chico though. He still does touch my heart. I think I need to find my identity again. I still feel like its me and cowboy. I still find myself planning things around getting home as quickly as possible because I feel like this is where I want to be. It could just be that this is where I feel the closest to cowboy. Anyways Im so happy to hear about everyones adoptions and they are some great looking new friends. I still want to adopt Im just not ready right now. Thank you so much for the understanding and support.

[LoveMyMickey]

Hi Cowboy....I understand completely what you mean about not being ready. If you still feel that's it's still you and Cowboy, then that is okay. That is a good idea, if possible, to sponsor Chico or any other you choose. That is what we are going to do.

Adopting right now would be a hardship on us, because we have other things to get caught up on. But I'm not sure we really want to. We still feel so connected to Mickey even though it has been almost 6 months.

So Cowboy, just enjoy your memories of your precious Cowboy and when the time is right, you will know....God Bless...

LoveMyMickey

[moon_beam]

"I think I need to find my identity again. I still feel like its me and cowboy. I still want to adopt Im just not ready right now"

Hi, cowboy, thank you so very much for sharing with us how you're doing. A major part of our grief journey is re-defining who we are NOW, and where do we go from here. I am so glad you are going to try to sponsor Chico - - this is a wonderful way to honor your beloved Cowboy. You could even make the donations in his loving honor. Only you will know when it is the "right time" to try to embrace another companion into your heart and home, cowboy - - and that is the way it should be for you.

I hope today is being kind to you, cowboy, and that you will have a very peaceful evening. I will look forward to knowing how things go for you about sponsoring Chico, and any other little waif who touches your heart who is waiting for a loving home. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, cowboy, and look forward ot knowing how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

[raerae777]

Hi Cowboy,

Just checking in on you to see how things are going. I hope you've had a good weekend and will have a good week. Thinking of you.

Much love.

Cinder's Mama

[cowboy]

Hi all. Just writing to let everyone know Im doing ok. Hey raerae thanks for checking in. I still have alot of ups and downs and am still just keeping myself busy as much as I can. Im so glad everyones doing good with their new friends and Im so sorry to here about all the losses from everyone else. I just havent been in a good mindset to write lately but I have been keeping up with how everyones doing so I hope everyone has a peaceful night and take care.

[Kristina]

cowboys dad

I have been thinking about you a lot lately, and wanted to come in to see how you were doing. I haven't been around a lot lately, but I still think about everyone all the time. I hope things are going well for you, my friend. Please update when/if you get the time. Much love to you.