I Will Always Love You, Princess Cinderella., Thank goodness I emailed this to someone... Options

[Kristina]

Rae I know exactly how you are feeling, except I have one where you have two. A few nights ago I was ready to be done with Lily, which is very unlike me. She also plays really hard in the evenings and gets rough, and I was so frustrated because she would not listen to me and Aj was at work all day, and then with his friends so I was with her for like 14 hours alone with no breaks. Once he got home we talked and I was able to get my frustrations out to him. He went out the next night to his friends house and took her with him so I could have a break. That 3 hour break changed everything. Once she was gone I missed her terribly, and since then I have had an easier time with her. I figured out a technique that worked for her and I in regards to her biting, and I started working on training with her more. I haven't gotten frustrated with her since he took her. I think we just have to have that "ah-ha" moment. Raising puppies is hard. They have to learn what is expected of them, and they just want to play. I just keep reminding myself that she really is just a baby and doesn't understand, but she will get there.

You won't have that same bond with Axel and Nala that you had with Cinder, but you WILL have a different type of bond. Same with Lily and us. Cinder was one of a kind. I think what happened with me was that I went into this thinking she would act the way Dixie did, and when she didn't I was really let down. I have to keep telling myself over and over that she isn't Dixie, and that she will have her own personality. Once the training is well underway I think things will get better.

I really love Cinder's book! It looks so nice! I hope you will keep sharing pages from it, because I would love to see more. I wish I was creative with things like that, but when I try to do something it usually ends up being a mess with glue everywhere.

I am thinking about you and your family lots. I hope things start to get easier for you soon. All my love to you.

[moon_beam]

Hi, Rae, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing, and how Axel and Nala are doing.

Crate training is an absolute MUST for puppies. It gives them a "safe place" where they can retreat to on their own, and it keeps them out of danger - - and mischief - - when there isn't someone home to watch them. It must never be used for discipline, though.

As for the rough play, one technique is to stop the play when it crosses the line into roughness. It's called a "time out" - - and all children of every life form need them. Separate them for a few minutes until they show that they have settled down. Repeat this whenever and as frequently as needed. The rough play is what they would do if they were with their wild cousins, for this is how they hone their hunting skills. For Axel and Nala this is not appropriate social skills, so they need you and your mom and dad to teach them what is acceptable. The primary reason why adopting two canine infants at the same time is not recommended is - - because - - puppies are a handful. It is like having a human infant / toddler, and most people are not up to the challenge. The benefit is that they do keep each other company, and once they learn their proper social behaviors they will be great company. You may want to consider doing some agility training with them - - eventually. Right now they just need to focus on the basics of potty training and learning their "good dog manners."

Rae, thank you so much for sharing your memory scrapbook of your beloved Cinder with us. The pictures of her are adorable. I hope doing this scrapbook is bringing you some comfort of your beloved Cinder.

Rae, I hope today is being kind to you and that you will have a pleasant evening. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, and look forward to knowing how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

[raerae777]

Hi friends,

Thank you for all the tips and advice. Moon_beam, I will definitely start trying the time out thing. We've kind of been doing that. yesterday was a better day. I was a little weepy all day because it has been 4 weeks since we lost Cinder. I guess Thursdays are going to be tough for a while. The puppies are doing good. They are getting more and more used to their kennels. We went and bought collars and leashes today and took Axel and left Nala in her kennel. She was asleep when we got back so I think she did okay. She sometimes seems to get more upset than Axel when we separate them, but maybe she's just a drama queen.

Danny and I went to a concert last night and it was nice to get out and have a good time. I have a girls' night planned tonight so that should be fun. Keeping myself busy and giving myself "breathers" from the puppies seems to help. I do miss them when I'm away. They're still sleeping in the bed with my dad so I told him as long as he was fine with them doing that forever then I guess it's okay. Cinder always liked to sleep in that big bed too until she got older then she slept in her own big bed.

I hope everyone is doing well and has a wonderful weekend.

Much love.

Cinder's Mama

[moon_beam]

Hi, Rae, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing, and how Axel and Nala are doing. Nala sounds like she is of a more dependent nature, and so she will exhibit more apprehension when she is separated from her brother. This is emotional bonding which is absolutely necessary for both Axel's and Nala's emotional and physical well-being. Comfort and reassure her when she shows signs of apprehension about being separated from Axel. She needs to know that you understand, and that you will always bring Axel back to her - - and vice versa.

I hope you will have a very pleasant evening tonight, and that you enjoyed the concert last night with Danny. Your beloved Cinder is very proud of you, Rae, and is smiling with a heart overflowing with love for you. Perhaps when you see it raining you will know that this is Cinder's love for you overlowing heaven's perfect garden reaching down to you.

Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, Rae, and look forward to knowing how you're doing, and how little Axel and Nala are doing as well.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

[raerae777]

Hi everyone,

This weekend went pretty well. The puppies are still wild of course and wrestling some, but they seem to be listening a little better. We are working on them not chewing and biting us too hard for now. Nala got out of bed last night and pooped in Cinder's old bed. I think it upset my dad some, but he knows she didn't know any better. We washed the cover of her bed today and it was hard because I didn't want to wash her smell off. The stuffing is still covered in her hair though so that makes me happy. So, the pups are sleeping in their kennels tonight and I'm crossing my fingers that it goes well. They cried for a tiny bit at first, but are quiet at least for now. They sleep in them off and on during the day so hopefully they'll do okay.

I've been less emotional this weekend and am starting to feel a little less anxious about everything. I'm starting to get ready for my first graduate classes on the 29th and my new job starts Sept 1. I guess I can put all of my anxiousness towards that. I hope to work on Cinder's book a lot this week before my classes start.

I hope everyone is doing well. I'm always thinking of y'all.

Much love.

Cinder's Mama

[raerae777]

Hi all,

It's been awhile since I've posted. I've been busy starting grad school and I start my new job Thursday. Not to mention chasing two puppies around! They've been doing pretty well. I think we're all getting more used to them being around and they're getting used to being around. I have to admit, I just recently started saying the "L" word to them, it took me awhile. They have their second check-up this Friday and we do have a couple things to address, Axel's constant itching and Nala's upset tummy. Hopefully we'll get those things taken care of, I'm hoping they're easy fixes and not stress related.

I have done a couple more pages in Cinder's book and am including a picture of them. I'm still thinking on how I want to lay the rest of the book out. I still miss her terribly, but I feel like I've been ignoring my feelings again and then they usually come rushing back to me in one instant. I know I've said this before, but what I wouldn't give to just bury my face in her fur and smell her and kiss her again. Everyone used to say her breath was terrible (what dog's breath isn't?), but it always comforted me, as weird as that sounds. She never smelled bad, always a comforting Cinder smell. I feel like I've almost forgotten what that was like. Sometimes it feels like she is slipping farther and farther away from me. Sometimes I feel guilty about not thinking of her all the time and for going on with my normal life, but I know that's what she wants. I know she is around here though, she loved her home and family so much.

I hope all of you are doing well and I will try to catch up on everyone's posts soon. Sometimes life is just too busy and fast-paced. But you know I love you all and am so thankful for this forum.

In the pictures in Cinder's book, the top middle is of my best friend (still to this day), Katie and I shortly after we got Cinder. She cried with me when I told her the story of Cinder's last night and day. These pictures are all of Cinder's "younger" days. And of course I'll include Axel and Nala's latest cute picture, taking a nap together.

Much love to you all.

Cinder's Mama

[moon_beam]

Hi, Rae, thank you so very much for sharing with us how you're doing, and how Axel and Nala are doing. And thank you SO MUCH for sharing with us your newest updates on your beloved Cinder's scrapbook.

"Sometimes it feels like she is slipping farther and farther away from me. Sometimes I feel guilty about not thinking of her all the time and for going on with my normal life, but I know that's what she wants. I know she is around here though, she loved her home and family so much. "

Rae, please let me reassure you that your beloved Cinder is NOT slipping away from you. Although she may not always be in the forefront of your thoughts, she is ALWAYS AND FOREVER tucked safely in your heart and your memories. NOTHING can ever take her away from you, not even the passage of time during your continued earthly journey. You can "take this to the bank" - - as the saying goes - - because it is TRUE. She is always and forever a heartbeat close to you. And she is sharing every moment of your earthly journey now in real time - - instead of having to wait for you to come home from school or work or shopping, etc., to tell her where you've been and what you've been doing. Please let your heart and mind be at peace.

I am sorry that Axel and Nala have some health issues - - scratching and upset tummy. Please let us know what their doctor says, and I'm hoping for a "simple fix" too.

Rae, I hope your courses go well for you this semester, and that you will enjoy your new job. Thank you again for sharing with us how you're doing and all of your news. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, Rae, and look forward to knowing how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

[Kristina]

Rae I too have not been around here lately. Life has gotten much more busy since the start of school.

Have the pups had their next vet visit yet? Could it possibly be their food? Lily was itching really badly when we first brought her home, and I changed the food we initially bought her and it stopped. She also quit having mushy poops.

It took me a bit to say the L word to Lily too. Now it seems like we have had her forever.

I love those pages in Cinder's book! It really makes me want to do something like that for Dixie, but I just am not talented in that department at all.

I know what you mean about the smelly breath being comforting. The last year or so of Dixie's life her breath was getting pretty rough, but I didn't want to have her teeth cleaned because I was afraid she wouldn't wake up.

I know our girls are together, and they are so happy that we have finally adjusted to life with our new pups. I still have days where I cry. We will never stop missing or loving them.

I hope everything is going good for you and your family. Always thinking about all of you and sending all my love.

[raerae777]

Hey everyone,

Boy, have I been busy!! Grad school and working are turning out to be huge adjustments for me! Well, today has been 2 months since the worst day of my life. It seems so much longer to me. I still miss her so much and I still have bad days. Today wasn't great, I think the stress and being overwhelmed with school and work makes my emotions worse sometimes. I still feel that ache whenever I think of her or see a picture of her. I have a video of her sleeping and snoring on my phone that often watch. It kind of makes me feel like she's still here. I'm scared one day I will forget what she looked like or her silly mannerisms, but then again I don't think I ever could. She truly was my soul mate and I still talk to her all the time.

The new babies are doing well. We found out Nala had coccidia, an intestinal parasite, probably from being kept outside at her old home. Axel didn't have it though thank goodness. She's doing much better now and gaining more weight. We haven't exactly solved Axel's itching, but we did switch foods and that has seemed to help him some. The vet gave us some meds for him that seemed to help too. They have had two puppy classes so far and have done wonderful in both. My mom and dad decided to take Nala along for the second class. I think it will be good for both of them to socialize with the other puppies. They are getting so big! I can barely pick Axel up and hold him for a long time anymore. Nala is still pretty petite though. She is being the typical female, always worrying about what we're doing and wanting to be on our heels every second while usually Axel is pretty much into himself and a huge goofball (typical male-sorry boys!). Although he does like to snuggle up and give kisses sometimes. They are both very smart though. I'm including a picture of Axel with Nala peeking in the background. They love to play under the chairs in the kitchen.

I did find time to work on Cinder's book a little more. I know the pics are small, but the left side is of her in the snow while the right page is pics of her with the family. Her and my dad at top left, me and mom at top right, me mom and brother bottom left, Danny and me middle bottom, and my papa (who has also passed) and her right bottom. I love the pics of her in the snow, she loved it so much. In the bottom right picture, Danny was making a snowball and she was so excited and running up to him because she knew he would throw it for her to catch. That night (and the top left pic) was her last snow; we had such a good time that night. I remember thinking it might be her last snow. I always crack up at the bottom left pic of her catching a snowball in the air. She looks like she is experiencing pure joy and I know she was. I'm sure she has plenty of snow to play with now.

Thanks to everyone for listening. I hope everyone is doing well and hopefully I can catch up with everyone one of these days.

To my princess, mama loves and misses you very much. Even though it may not seem like it, I still think of you all the time. I know you know that I'm busy and that you are with me every step of the way. I love you and thank you for all the joy and love you brought into my life. Love and kisses to my sweet, sweet Cinderella girl.

Much love.

Cinder's Mama

[Cheryl83]

Hi Rae,

It's good to hear from you. I know how busy you must be with starting school etc. I hope that despite the stress, you're still able to enjoy it.

I got tears in my eyes looking at the latest additions to Cinder's scrapbook. I guess the love and devotion you have for your girl overwhelmed me and I got sad that we have to physically be separated from this love. But I know that they'll always be with us in our hearts and soul and that's what keeps us going. I promise you that you will never forget what she looks like. It's been almost a year and a half since I lost my bunny (the one who thought she was a dog!) and yet every time I close my eyes I can still picture every little thing about her so perfectly. Their images have been imprinted into our memory, and we will never forget them. For the first couple of months after she died I used to watch a video of her on my phone every night before I went to sleep. It really helped to comfort me, and also laid to rest any fears that I had at the time of forgetting. Perhaps you could try this too?

Thanks for updating us on Axel and Nala. Hearing about their little antics really makes me smile. The picture you shared is so cute -- I can't believe how big they're getting!

Rae, please know that you're in my thoughts, and that I wish you the best of luck with your studies, and everything else in your life. I look forward to hearing from you again whenever you're able.

Take care,
Cheryl x

[Cappy]

Those pups are beautiful!

[Gretta's Mom]

Hi Rae Rae

What a time you've been having during these last few weeks! This is a measure of your loving and courageous heart - even though there are moments when it seem like utter stupidity! You puppies cam e to you just about the same time as my big lug Rufus (the ha;f-blakc lab, half Newfie) - about 3 weeks after Gretta's passing. I know what you mean about not begin ready but at the same time not being able to go on without some place to put your heart's love. Three weeks was a pretty short time and I, like you, didn't feel much of what could be called love for Rufus. Poor guy. Having to go to a home where the love was cool - NOT his fault. After a few days I had the "talk" with him - telling him that no matter what it seemed like at the time, he WAS loved for himself, he was NOT a replacement for someone of something else, and that I would NEVER abandon him. At the time those words were mostly for me. Over the past months, he has ever so slowly grown love-tendrils around my heart - and Moonbeam and peggy told me he would. It's only been in the last three or four weeks that I've really felt tender, sweet love for him. Poor guy again - having to wait all that time for a mom to come to love him. Dogs get us better than we get ourselves, though, and they forget their bad pasts (or maybe forgive them), so we're on a much better footing now.The key question for me was again one of Moonbeam's "Woudl I be happier not having the responsibility ? Would I be willing to give up having his meet me at the door every night - snorting, snuffing and barking (we worl=ked on that)? Of course, even at that time the answer was no. Just like your "no" answer to giving up one of your two new puppies. I've never had puppies, and I imagine that having two puppies must be a lot like having quadruplet humans!

My sister Bobbie has a new two-year old English C spaniel and she has had a million issues with him - yesterday he got out of a locked crate and caused various mayhem around the house. It's a job - but it's a labor of love.

Every day, a little step. Think how different they and you will be 365 days from now. If you want. shoot Bobbie (she's my sister) a short post and ask her to tell you all the antics she's going through with Mr Dreamer! You guys should get a lot of (ironic) chuckles out of each other's experiences. My Rufus is bigger and much older (8 years old), so he sleep a lot after the long walks we take. Love will grow by sweet tendrils, but it will take some time. And then one day you wake up and realize that they have wormed their wways into your soul, too.

And we'll never, EVER be able to forget Cinder and Gretta. These are the precious soul-mates who exchanged pieces of soul with us. Even though they're not always front mind - the ache in the soul keep us remembering that they are always with us.

Thank you for being a true and caring friend, raerae.

Gretta's mom