Feeling Guilty Options

[Brutus]

Thinking of you today Anna and your furangel Max.

Praying peace and happy memories for you.

Merrry Christmas,
Hugs,
Brutus' Mom

[smokey/lady/max]

Thank you Sonya it was a hard day yesterday but I managed to get through it. Hope you and your family had a nice christmas.

Anna

[ladywolf]

Hi Anna--

I'm so sorry about Max.

Last night I dreamed--for hours, it seemed--that my little Poppers was lost somewhere in a strange city and I was trying to find her. When I awoke, my heart was shaken with tears, because she died two weeks ago...

I think it's really cool that you keep posting to Max. We appreciate it, and wish you well!!!

Big Hugs--Margi

[smokey/lady/max]

Thanks Margi the days are just so empty without my Max here. The house is just so quiet he was very verbal and always kept me busy wanting me to let him in and out. Now all I do is stare out the window at his resting place. I know he isnt far from me but it just isnt the same as if he were sitting right here beside me. Cant wait until I see him again.

Thank you for visiting my post
Anna

[smokey/lady/max]

Just wanted to see you in your santa hat, I cant get enough of you. I miss you more everyday.

Sending lots of head scratches your favorite
Mommy

[smokey/lady/max]

Hi sweet boy mommy is sitting here watching it snow and thinking about you today. Mommy sure wishes I could stop crying becsuase nothing I can do to change the chain of events or bring you back. All I have now is to look forward to the day I will get to see you again and be with you for eternity. I pray for that everynight.

Missing you deeply
Mommy

[smokey/lady/max]

Mommy was wondering if that was you that turned off my TV it shut off right as mommy was talking to you. I wish to beleive it was you letting me know you where here. Thank you my preciuos boy. Every little thing that happens out of the ordinary I know that it is you.

I carry you in my heart everyday
Mommy

[smokey/lady/max]

Guess who? Just your mommy having another really rough night without you. You were and still are my everything life is so lonely without you here. Your presence in this house is missed by all of us. Mommy will never be the same. Mommy has to go now because the tears are fllowing and I cant see to type.

Luv You
Head scratches your favorite

[smokey/lady/max]

Hi Precious I am sitting here thinking about you as always. You are my first waking thought and what I think about until I go to bed. That is my routine now. I may not have you here to let in and out all day but you sure keep me busy thinking of you all day.

Missing You
Mommy

[smokey/lady/max]

Hi My little devil with your beautiful wings you now carry. I hope you got mommys big kiss I kissed your beauitul face here on my computer. I even came to the back door to wish you happy new year. Give big sloppy kiss to momo and ladybud. Every year that goes by now will be one year closer to you. Stay here with mommy in spirit and dont ever wonder off. Your home here, and my heart will always be yours.

Sending you head scratches and big Kisses
Luv Mommy

[Brutus]

Hi Anna, just got your message. Just wanted to drop a line and say I hope 2010 finds you in good spirits and happy memories of Max.

Hugs,
Sonya

[smokey/lady/max]

Thank you Sonya,

I wish the same for you and your family.

Anna

[murphy]

Hello To Everyone
I am feeling sooo guilty that I put my max to sleep last week. I cant eat cant sleep and I just want to go back in time to change my decission. I went through this 3 1/2 years ago with my smokey but he did live to be 14 and this time my max was only 7 and I feel I didnt give him a chance to fight for life. Max was diagnosed with a mass on his spleen and he was bleeding from his rectum. The vet was 95 percent sure it was cancer and said that she could take a needle and asperate to make sure but either way his slpeen would have to be removed and that it was a magor surgery and he could maybe not make it. He was in alot of pain 2 days prior to taking him to the vet. He could barely walk . She said she could give him steriods to give me some quilty time with him for the holidays. My husband ask would the out come be the same she said yes it would just buy me some more time with him. At that momement I just didnt want him to suffer. Now I feel like I didn't give him that oppritunity to still be here. I guess in my mind he still was eating and he was so healthy aweek before we noticed he wasnt feeling good. He was always so chipper and love to play and the last 5 days of his life he was in pain. It just breakes my heart that he is gone now. I lay in bed and just sob out loud asking him to forgive me for killing him. I know in my heart he is freed from pain but I wish I could free mine. The only day I felt good was the day I went back to get him. I was going to have him cremated but then couldnt bring myself to do that so I went and brought his body home and burried him with my Smokey and lady. I got max for my smokey because he greived our lady when we had to put her down so I got max for him. I swore when this day would come I would not let myself get like this again and here I am. I visited this site quite a bit the first year my smokey passed but could never bring myself to reach out. For some reason this time it has really been effecting me. I want to thank all of you who care this much for others suffering to be on this site to express thier love for our pets and our pain. The loss of a pet to me is worse then the loss of a family memebr. They are the most loyal and loving thing in our lives. More so then our spouse or anyone. I know in my heart that there is a heaven for them I experineced something so special when my smokey died this is a true story. When he passed I started searching different web sites and came across the rainbow bridge the day that I found it when I went out back and looked up at the graves of my lady and smokey there was a double rainbow right above where they are burried. I have pictures of it. I had in my 51 years never seen a double rainbow. I felt at that momement it was my smokey telling me he was at the rainbow bridge with his lady waiting for me. It was literaly right after I had read the rainbow poem I went out to talk to him and seen the rainbows. If anyone could tell me how to post the rainbows pictures since I am new at this and I am not even sure I am doing this post right. Well I am going to try to post this and hope that it works because I sure could use a friend who understands my loss.

[murphy]

I fully understand your loss, because I am going through the same thing with the loss of my little Westie last Sunday. This is one of the worst hurts in my life. I still feel guilty of the way things happened and wish I could have changed the way the loss of my pet occured. I am hoping that I may help someone in the future so they will not go through what I had to. Maybe someone reading this can help someone by advising pet owners to be prepared and have an emergency vet. or emergencey vet. hopital contact available that is open on weekends and holidays etc. I am saying this because I live in a rural area and I did not know that their was an emergency vet. hopital open in the area I live on a holiday weekend. This was not smart on my part.

Again I understand your loss.

[Rhapsedy]

Hello,

I am so sorry about your loss. Everyone on this website totally understands how you feel. You will find much needed support and comfort here.

I too feel guilty about the way my pets life ended. It is so hard because I couldn't have made things so much better for him. I tried to think thru everything and make everything perfect but there were things I didn't think think about. These things haunt me.

We both need to keep telling ourselves that we tried to do everything right and that no matter how it ended we would have felt guilty about something. We loved our babies with all of our heart and did the best we could for them.

I will be praying for you that you will find peace and your memories will be of everything that you did right for your baby.

Love and hugs,
Rhapsedy

I fully understand your loss, because I am going through the same thing with the loss of my little Westie last Sunday. This is one of the worst hurts in my life. I still feel guilty of the way things happened and wish I could have changed the way the loss of my pet occured. I am hoping that I may help someone in the future so they will not go through what I had to. Maybe someone reading this can help someone by advising pet owners to be prepared and have an emergency vet. or emergencey vet. hopital contact available that is open on weekends and holidays etc. I am saying this because I live in a rural area and I did not know that their was an emergency vet. hopital open in the area I live on a holiday weekend. This was not smart on my part.

Again I understand your loss.

[janika]

Hello Murphy

I am so sorry for your loss and the hurt and sadness you are going through.
I also lost my darling Samoyed Noushka over a 'bank holiday' weekend. I too wish I'd got the emergency vet to visit, but I just didn't realise how poorly my girl was. We took her after the holiday Monday, and she didn't last out one nights at the vets. I feel so bad about it. The only thing that gets me through is the fact that she was with us until that very last night. But I wasn't with her when she passed and that is so painful to think about.
I do not know your circumstances but it is plain to see that you love your darling Westie so much(I say love and not loved because I truly believe that our darlings are still with us). Sometimes things are beyond our control , but we blame ourselves. It's natural as we feel we have let them down, we've been responsible for them and loved and cared for them , but couldn't do anything to save them. We question everything we did at the end, could we have, should we have , what if.....They know that we did what we thought was best for them at that time.
I do hope you will find some comfort on here from people who are all going through the grief of physically losing our beloved pets. It has certainly helped me. I wouldn't have managed without all these wonderful new friends.

Thinking of you.
Love Jan and my Angels Tasha and Noushka xx

[alentrell23]

I think we all feel guilty, but not letting our babies suffer has to mean so much more. It is very difficult to let them go.
I pray that knowing your loved one will no longer feel pain or sickness will bring you comfort.

Allicia (Montgomery)

[smokey/lady/max]

Thank you Allicia for your kind and thoughtful words

Max's Mommy Anna

[smokey/lady/max]

Idgit mommy had a dream last night that you ran away, but it turned out that a neighbor took you and dropped you off on some road. When I woke up I was very depressed. I have to remember it was a dream. I think I was upset because I didnt see you. I know when you can you will come visit my dreams. I miss you soooo much and cant wait until I do.

LUV YOU MY ANGEL
Mommy

[smokey/lady/max]

Hi precious mommy just finished eating this is the part of day I miss you the most. I miss you sitting by my chair and waiting for your little left overs. That was one of your passions in life eating, and sun bathing yourself. Then you would patiently wait for dozer to finish eating to see if he left you any crumbs in his bowl. This is truly my hardest times without you sitting here right by my side. It just is so sad for me when I now just feed dozer. There is such a big void around here. I sure hope you are eating up a storm in heaven.

Thinking about you so much
Mommy
xoxoxo