My Beloved Vicki Is Dead, My pet cat died just over 48 hours ago Options

[Cathy]

I'm glad I found this site. It has just been over 48 hours since I lost my precious kitty. She was 7 years old, named Vicki, pure black. (I have a thing for black cats; I think they are the most beautiful creatures on earth!) She was a housecat, but she had lately gotten into the habit of slipping out the front door whenever someone opened it, going out onto the porch, and rolling around on her back. I mistakingly thought, oh, she's right here in our yard, she'll be all right.

Day before yesterday, my 12-year-old daughter was returning from a 3-day field trip at about 5:30 p.m. She told me that when she opened the door, Vicki scooted out. I was downstairs in the basement. A couple of minutes later, it was that quick, she ran down screaming, "Vicki!" and "dogs!" I ran, my heart in my throat.

My husband was in the back yard, yelling at a large black dog. My poor baby was lying on the wet grass (it was raining), not moving, still trying to breathe but her eyes already glazing over. I ran and got a box, and we tenderly lifted her into it. My husband and I ran to try to phone the vet. He had to call, I was so hysterical. I ran back out to the front porch, where my daughter was stroking her, in tears, begging her, "Hang on, Vicki, please hang on." She was still trying to breathe. In a minute, though, she was breathing no more. Her glazed eyes and perfectly still body showed all too clearly that she was gone.

My poor daughter cried, "Mommy, I'm sorry! I'm so sorry! I should have made her come back inside!" And I hugged her and said, "No, honey, it's not your fault." I was feeling that it was MY fault for not coming up and getting Vicki inside, but I had no idea at all, and neither did my husband.

There were 2 dogs, and they grabbed her and mauled her. I did not see this, but my daughter did. She said they had her up in the air, chewing on her. We couldn't have done anything. It happened so fast. I have never felt so devastated. I picked her poor still body up and practically howled with pain and grief. I must have stood there crying for 15 minutes, holding her like a baby. I didn't feel this bad with our last cat, who died of old age back in 2001. I cried when she died, but she died peacefully, just crawled under a chair and went to sleep and never woke up. But my poor Vicki--I can still see her gasping for breath, her eyes already glazed over. I hope she was able to feel our gentle hands trying to comfort her in her last moments.

We have already buried her. The night of her death she spent in our freezer, wrapped in a garbage bag. I went out several times to pet her cold, stiff body and cry. I cut some of her black fur, which I put into an envelope as a keepsake. I think I will sleep with it under my pillow tonight. A friend of my older daughter's dug a grave yesterday, and we buried her yesterday afternoon. I wrote her a farewell note and put it under her paws and kissed her goodbye. I put a vase of black silk roses at the grave and wrote her name on a rock with Liquid Paper.

How I miss her! She used to lounge on my bed all day, and whenever I go into my room I remember her being there. She would lay at my feet while I was in bed and walk up to my head and butt my face with hers. And if I got up to go to the bathroom, she would follow me in there. If I shut the door she would scratch at the door, meow, and even extend her paws under the door until I opened it, and then she'd come in with her fussy little "meow" to scold me!

The night before she died, she was real lovey-dovey, in a way she had not been for a long time. She went back and forth, rubbing my leg, and she spent over half an hour lying in my lap. Now I wonder if the Lord had her do this to tell me good-bye. I will cherish it always.

I have to pull myself together because I have so much to do that cannot wait. We are in financial difficulties and do not even answer the phone if we don't know who it is because creditors are calling us all day long. I'm also the primary caregiver for my elderly mother-in-law, who is here with us and has advanced Alzheimer's. Plus we are concerned about our 17-year-old daughter, who has diabetes and is missing too much school. I'm trying to cope with all this, and I have bipolar disorder, and I'm just hoping that my grief over Vicki won't send me into another episode. Vicki helped me chill out in the midst of all this. And now she is gone.

I feel so bad for my 12-year-old daughter. She blames herself for not bringing Vicki back into the house. She also saw the dogs attacking Vicki. How I wish she had not seen that.

We have 2 other cats, and they are sweet, but it won't be the same without my Vicki. She was my kitty cat, and I was her pet person. I just hope that she remembers her pet person where she is now.

Thanks for reading this long post. Please remember us in your prayers.

Cathy in GA

[moon_beam]

Hi, Cathy, please permit me to offer you and your family my sincerest sympathies in the loss of your beloved Vicki. Losing a beloved companion is never easy regardless of the cir%%stances or how long we have been blessed with their company. However, Vicki's death was a shocking tragedy, and this is one of the reasons why your grief is particularly difficult. Does your area have a leash law? Does your State have legal recourse for you to pursue charges against the owners of the dogs for the death of your precious Vicki? This may be something you may want to investigate as a means of vindicating the way Vicki died. I am so sorry that you are having severe financial challenges, Cathy. It sounds like you and your family are going through very stressful times. Vicki knows you love her, and the last thing she felt before her living Spirit went home to the angels was your loving touch comforting her. Vicki is now healed in the loving arms of our Father Creator, and will be lovingly and happily greeting you when it is your appropriate time to join her in eternal joy. This grief journey is difficult when our lives have "normal" stresses, but can be compounded due to the extreme stress you and your family are presently experiencing. Cathy, please know you and your family are not alone in grieving your loss of Vicki. Each of us are here for you for as long and as often as you need us. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, Cathy, and please let us know how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

[Zita'sMom]

Hi Cathy

I'm sorry to hear what you are going through. It is so difficult to lose our special pets and when other things in our lives are full of challenges it is especially painful.

My husband had the same experience of his cat giving him "extra affection" the day before she was killed by the neighbour's dog. I do wonder if there was a knowing...

I also know about "special cats". I lost 2 very special healing kitties. I have one cat left, and dogs, but those 2 cats - well you just can't replace these special souls. I was lucky to have found 2 and I have to be grateful for the short time I had them.

It doesn't make the pain easier and I wish you many blessings and healing for your pain.

Jan.

[ann]

Cathy, I'm so sorry for your loss. This was a truely tradgic accident. I just got thru reading olly30 post who's dog got a cat and was feeling very guilty. It's the natural instinct of the dog. This is no way anyones fault. Please do not feel guilty. Sending prayers to you and your family..Vicki is surrounded by much love over the rainbow bridge and she had with you..Hugs.. Ann

[Chuck]

Cathy: I am truly sorry to hear what happened to Vicki. It's only been about 48 hours since my beloved cat Fate also left us unexpectedly and like you I think I am still in a state of shock. I don't know what solace I can offer you other than I can already tell that there are many caring people on this site and I hope we can all get through these things together.

Chuck

[LoveThem]

I am so very sorry about your loss. I understand what you mean about Vicki being special.

you said: I cut some of her black fur, which I put into an envelope as a keepsake.

For my 3 cats, that I lost in 2002, 2006, 2007, I took their fur from a hairbrush and put it
in a ziplock bag, along with a note naming them and a favorite toy...a ball. I have found that when I take the fur out of that bag...it is just as alive and soft and when it was a part of them. I don't know if the airtight bag helps or not. But it is a comfort to be able to handle that fur and know it was truly a part of them that will never be taken away. It is the only way to have a real contact anymore. But I am glad I did that. Each one has their own bag and I just keep the small bags in my dresser drawer...handy when I just want to sit on the bed and stroke that fur that was a part of one who meant so very much.

I've found when things happen quickly...it was always more devastating for me than when I had time to prepare for the absence. We are never really prepared but quickness to me..just left me in shock and a greater pain..if that is possible.

Time will make everything bearable but never take the pain completely away.

We gave them peace...then it is our turn to try and find it for ourselves. But having them in our lives will always be worth the pain for the time we had together..without the pain.

I, too have a special feeling about black cats..as you can see by my Tributes to my 3.

[sunrize]

Cathy, I am sorry about the tragic loss of Vicki. I have witnessed dog attacks on cats and I know your daughter feels bad. It wasn't her fault or yours. I believe most people who loose a beloved friend feels guilt for one reason or another. Viki had a wonderful life with you and your family and you were there to compfort her as she passed. All of you will be in my thoughts and prayers. Hugs, Ava

[LuvLabs]

Cathy, I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your dear sweet Vicki. My heart goes out to you and your family during this difficult time. You sound like such a huge animal lover, and I am so glad you found this board. Often times, just letting your feelings out to others will ease your pain a little. I hope that we can offer some comfort and peace to you.

[sissycat]

I am sorry to hear of the tragic accident that cut short Vicki's time with you. I too lost a cat June of this year to an accident. I was her person. Still have 3 left but she was the queen. lol I think we all go through the guilt phase. It is just part of the grieving and healing process. You daughter will heal in time also. It was probably very horrible for her to witness.
I know alot of people say it is just a dog's natural instinct. I just don't know if I completely agree with that. I have seen so many people that sick dogs on cats that is just awful. Some dogs are just so loving to cats. So hard to say every dog wants to attack cats. Anyway getting off the subject I am here for.
This is really a great site. You can come here to write what ever you want and we will listen. You can cry or gripe- we are here for you. I know it seems hard to believe right now, but it will get better. I mean yes the pain will always be there-but it will be less intense for all of you. Continue to love your other furbabies.

Hugs to you and your Angel Vicki!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Cathy]

Thank you very much. It's been just about 72 hours now (she was killed on Wednesday at about 5:30 p.m.) I've fixed up her grave with a rock marker, name written on it with Liquid Paper, a vase of 3 black silk roses, and 2 black cat statuettes (from my older daughter's Egyptian phase back in grade school). Last night I slept with her fur in its envelope under my pillow.

Our town is supposed to have a very strict leash law. In fact, it's supposed to apply to cats as well as dogs, though I must say I have never seen a cat on a leash. Most dogs I've seen around here are on leashes. We have no idea where these dogs came from. There appeared to be no one with them. I don't know if the owner let them run loose or if they got out of an enclosure by accident. My husband only said that they had collars on and that on the collars were small blue boxes of some sort. My daughter said that somebody did call the police. My younger daughter and I had to go pick up my older daughter, and while we were gone my husband said a police officer came to our door. Apparently the dogs had killed another cat in the neighborhood. (My daughter said she heard that the dogs went through a screen door into a house to get that cat!) When I later called the police, I was referred to Animal Control, and on speaking with a gentleman in that office, I was informed by him that the dogs had been caught. I have no idea what's going to be done with them. He told me that the owner would probably have to pay a hefty fine and follow the special precautions owners of vicious animals have to follow. (Interestingly, though, both my husband and my daughter told me that the dogs were not at all threatening towards them. They just seem to be bent on being vicious to cats.) I feel like going down to the county animal shelter on Monday, asking if the dogs were caught, and what is going to be done with them.

My other fur babies have been a comfort. My older daughter has a little female kitten she's named Leah, and my younger daughter has an adult female cat, whom we've had for about 3 years, named Anna, who is white and has a tail that looks like a raccoon's tail. This little gray kitten, Leah, is a feisty one. She gobbles down all the food we feed her, and if a cat, even a bigger one, approaches, she growls at them!

How I wish my big girl was still with me. (She weighed 10 pounds.) I miss her every time I go to the bathroom, every time I'm in my bed. I can't even bear to look at our backyard; I've kept the curtains drawn. (I did look out long enough to see a deer in our yard yesterday, though.) I felt so sad when I called our vet and told them they could close their file on Vicki.

Still trying to hang on...and on.

[Steve K.]

Cathy,

I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I just recently lost my dog and last year we lost our 17 year old cat. Our dog was hit by a car but our cat died of old age. The loss of our dog was more painful than the loss of our cat because our dog was young and healthy and taken from us prematurely just like your Vicki. The loss of our Furfee cat was also painful but he lived a full life and it was his time. I can truly say that I know how you feel and I asked the Lord to help you and ease your pain. They take a piece of our hearts with them when they go and in time the heart will heal but the memory of your Vicki will always be with you. Once again, I am deeply sorry for your loss.

[LoveThem]

Cathy,

you said: I feel like going down to the county animal shelter on Monday, asking if the dogs were caught, and what is going to be done with them.



I think I would feel exactly the same way and probably would do it. I would not like to think the dogs were still loose, and I believe I also would like to know what their fate would be. Would it be so they never have a chance to do that again? And if it was just a fine, my question to the person who only gave a fine as a penalty....would be to write a letter asking what the penalty would be..if they had gone after a child? (I find that if someone is not an animal person....they at least understand about a tiny human possibly killed).

In fact, if there is no decision yet...I would find out who to write to and write such a letter anyway.

I am so sorry for your loss and in such a horrible way. Makes one really ask the question.....WHY?

Judy

[MissingMyLittleI...]

Cathy, I just thought I would post you a little message and ask if you are doing OK? I just lost my sweet little cat Iggy to a car Monday night (I can't believe almost a week has gone by...) and I don't feel like I am ever going to get over this. So much guilt, so much anger at the driver of the car, so much sorrow... and I feel like I have so many other negative things going on in my life right now that I am overwhelmed. I really identified with what you said about having too many things to deal with, along with grieving for your sweet Vicki, and without her to help you through it all. I noticed that there were posts for a few days when you came to the site, but nothing since then... and just thought I would put something here in case you came back and needed it. Hope you are well.

[Bubba]

Cathy --This forum is definetly the place to be.You will find understanding people the likes of which you have probably never encountered before.This forum will get you through this unbearable transition and beyond.God bless your beautiful baby Vicki.As a suggestion, google 'The Rainbow Bridge' as a starting point in this new chapter of your life---------God bless........Bubba...........