Fred, Loss of my wife's other best friend Options

[Mywifescat]

My wife's cat Fred seems to be on his last legs. I feel very helpless. I love my animals, but my better half is mad for Fred. I have known my wife for 6 years, but she has had Fred for 14 years. I just don't want to get in the way of her last hours with him. I love him, I really do.

Should I stay away from them in these last hours? I feel like an intruder...

Thanks all.

[Caroline]

I think your wife would want your comfort right now. She would want to know that you love Fred too, and that his loss and passing is upsetting for you too. And it is important for her to know that you are there for her during this very sad time. I think it will make her feel less alone. I think she will let you know if she wants time alone. Just let her know you are there for her no matter what. I am sorry you are going through this. It is so hard. I hope Fred's passing is peaceful...

Take care, Caroline

[bluejules]

My beloved Siamese Ammy died 3 years ago. He was very much "my" cat, I'd had him for 16 years, a long time before I met my husband. When Ammy died, Pete was very, very supportive of me, although I was obviously more upset than anyone. I think it would be really good for you to support your wife through this time. Pete constantly told me what a fantastic cat Ammy was, and this made me feel a lot better.

We lost our Maine Coon boy, Shaun, on Tuesday. This time we are equally devastated, but trying hard to support each other.

Blessings,

Jules

[kimkalli]

I think how you respond depends much upon your wife's personality. I lost my dog 5 days ago. My husband is very supportive and wants me to talk and hug, but frankly, I just want to be left alone. I don't handle death well and the more people that touch me, a simple pat on the back, will put me into tears. Tell her you are there for her and ask her what will help her to comfort her at this time. Everyone copes differently.

[LS Support]

be there when she needs you, give her space if she doesnt. as others have said, it all depends on her personality. prepare yourself for the 5 stages of
grief, an article can be found in the articles section in this forum.

[mosmommy]

I know that when I lost my Cosmo, I felt alone, but my boyfriend of 16 years, was also grieving. He just seemed to handle it better than me, and he seemed to be able to move on a little faster. At times, I know he thought that I didn't think he cared, but he let me know, often, that he did. I went to him when I was ready, and with his constant support, I feel I can go to him whenever I need to. Somedays, I want to be left alone, and other days, I want to reach out to him. Just let your wife know that you will be there ALWAYS, and when she is ready or she needs you, she will trust that she can come to you. Be prepared though, the grief process is long and hard, and there will be days that you will want her back happy, the way she was before the loss, but you will need to give her time, lots of time, and patience.
Peace, Love, and Prayers,
Michelle