My Last Night With You Was 9 Months Ago Options

[Steph]

Dear Luba,

I know that your 9 month death annivesary isn't til Saturday, but this time round I wanted to remember your last night with me. June 2nd. Do you remember how I had come back after my date with Michael. I was so tired after a long, albeit fun day. You and Falkor came to greet me. You, in your usual over-the-top enthusiastic way, he in his subdued "cool, you are home" polite way.

You raced over to me with your ball, wagging your tail. I knew what you wanted, but I was so tired and did not want to go on a longer walk with you. I'm happy to say that, as was the case 95% of the time, your enthusiasm won me over. I took Falkor for his brief "arthritis walk" ie, slow and short. Then I took you over to the vacant schoolyard to play ball.

Remember how you flew accross the field bringing your ball back to me. Wagging your tail "Again!!" "Throw the ball AGAIN" And I complied. We had little daylight left, but we used it all up, then returrned home. I gave you both a pig ear, and went to bed. I'm so happy that we had that last evening. I'm so happy that I took you to play.

The next day, mom, who was down from her place up north came to me in alarm "Your dog is sick. You need to come to her." God, when you lay in the living room and didn't get up when I rushed over I knew we were in serious trouble. I did not think that you'd die though.

Anyways, I just wanted to reflect on our last evening. We had so many like that, but that one will stay with me forever.

Keep an eye on Falkor for me Luba, his arthritis is really acting up. I hope he'll be with me for a while still. Maybe you can send him positvie "doggy vibes" that will help him feel better....

[Ann H]

Dear Steph. I am thinking of you, Luba, and Falkor. That was wonderful that you took the time to take her for a walk and to let her play ball. I guess even when we are so tired we still have time to love them. Our hearts are broken enough under any cir%%stance when they leave us. Had you not played with her the day before you would have felt even more guilty. Keep hugging all those wonderful memories of your beautiful baby and hold them close to your heart. Luba is with you always just as her love is and always will be.
Love, Ann

[Steph]

Ann, for the first time since she passed I have started to feel that she is somehow still part of me. Maybe she's keeping an eye on us from wherever it is that they go.

Yes, I am glad that I went and played with her that last night. I almost always did no matter how tired or sick I felt. She just HAD to play ball everyday.

[Ann H]

Dear Steph, I believe with all my heart our babies are still with us. We just have to listen and watch for them to let us know they are there. I believe they can come and go as they please and in between watching us they also go and have some play time.

My Snookie was real good at tossing a ball into the air, high enough for us to catch. Clair and I used to laugh and say she was throwing it for us to run and chase. She must have thought we were just like her or more that she was just like us. Maybe Snookie is throwing a ball for Luba to catch and they are both having a blast.

I know Luba's birthday is coming in April and it is sure to make you so sad just as it did when Snookie's birthday came and she wasn't with me. No party for her with us for the first time in all those years. It was a real hard day for all of us.
Love, Ann

[Steph]

Hi Ann,

Thank you so much for responding, and for remembering Luba's upcoming birthday. She would have been 10 on April 29th. She shares her birthday with my mother.

What a nice image to think of Snookie and Luba playing ball together!

I am starting to feel like I should move off this site. It feels like I can't give as much support as needed to the new people. I am only able to say a few words to maybe one or two new posters. I don't even know if it helps.

I don't want Luba to be forgotten.

[BabyHannahsMom]

Hey Steph,
My thoughts are with you tonight and Saturday. I know we have both come a long way, but the pain is still very strong, isn't it?

I wasn't going to come to the site tonight, but I felt compelled to. Every night I've been here and read the posts, I have ended up in tears and I haven't been able to sleep. I got in the bed tonight and turned out the light, but couldn't sleep anyway, so I got up and signed on here.

Last night I put Hannah's little picture on the pillow next to me. I just want to hold my little love girl so much. I keep hoping and praying she will come to me in a dream, but that hasn't happened yet. I still much her so very very much. Sometimes I don't know how I'll make it without seeing her again in this lifetime --

I am so glad you have that wonderful memory of your last night spent with Luba. I know you cherish that time and so many others. I know the memories are supposed to bring us comfort, but the memories do not fill the emptiness I feel in my heart and my life, and they never will. I miss my little girl dog, and I know you miss your little girl dog too. How in the world have we made it this long? So long -- in six weeks, it will be one year since Hannah's been gone.

Please email me tomorrow if you want to. Take care, my friend.
Love,
Marcia

[BabyHannahsMom]

Remember...
I will still be here
As long as you hold me
in your memory
Remember,
when your dreams have ended
Time can be transcended
Just remember me...

I am the one star
that keeps burning so brightly
It is the last light to fade into the rising sun
And with you whenever you tell my story
For all I am and all I’ve done

Remember, I will still be here
As long as you hold me in your memory
Remember me...

I am that one voice in the cold wind that whispers
And if you listen
You’ll hear me call across the sky
As long as I still can reach out and touch you
Than I will never die

Remember
I’ll never leave you
If you will only
Remember me

Remember
I will still be here
As long as you hold me
In your memory

Remember
When your dreams have ended
Time can be transcended
I live forever
Remember me
Remember me
Remember me

Song by Josh Groban

[Steph]

Hi Marcia, thank you so much for checking in on me. It's quite something to think of how much time has gone by since they passed. You are so close to the one year date now. I'm getting there too. I never thought that I'd get there.

That looks like a wonderful Josh Groban song. I've never heard it. The only ones I've heard are "Your raise me up" and another one called... hmmm I forgot the title is it "Where you are"?? I want to hear the one you posted. The lyrics are beautiful.

[Rusty's Mom]

Marcia and Steph,

Is that song by Josh Groban from a recent movie? I've got 2 of his cd's and it's not on either. I couldn't stop crying just reading the lyrics............I'm sure it will have a stronger effect hearing the music.

Thinking of you, Marcia and your beloved Hannah. A year is so long for her to be gone. I do hope that sweet Hannah comes to you in a dream one of these nights. I feel like it's been years since I've held my precious Rusty and it's just about 3 months.

Nine months for you, Steph. Luba will never be forgotten. We all feel we knew her through your heartfelt posts. And what a wonderful memory you have of the last day you spent together.

Ann, I hope your health is improving. That photo you posted a few days ago of your adorable granddaughter with Schintzel, both sitting in the chair was so cute.

Thinking of everyone,

Love,
Lynn

[Steph]

Thank you Lynn, I am so glad that my Luba is part of your life, and others here at this site. It is great that we have each other. I've come to know so many of you, and so many wonderful furbabies.

I too, would love to hear the Josh Groban song. Marcia, could you let us know what CD it is on?

[BabyHannahsMom]

The song is on "Josh Groban -- Live at the Greek." You can listen to it here:
http://mp.netscape.com/audio.uvox.adp?mxid=1134207