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screechthesteelerkitty
46 years old
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Born Oct-6-1978
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Joined: 16-March 06
Profile Views: 1,333*
Last Seen: 19th March 2006 - 11:18 AM
Local Time: Nov 14 2024, 12:10 PM
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MSN steelersrox
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screechthesteelerkitty

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16 Mar 2006
I just lost my baby boy screech on Monday. I took him in to the vet on saturday because he quit eating, became very lethargic and had difficulty breathing. I was informed by the doctor that he was in the final stages of heart failure. I couldn't beleive it!! in the 14 years that I had him he never had so much as a cold! I asked the doctor what we could do and very quietly she told me that the only thing we could do for him was put him down. If we tried any treatments his heart would give out because it was so weak. Without my husband there I collapsed, and really don't remember the rest of the visit. I brought him home with me and spent one last weekend with him. on Monday evening my husband and I took him to the vet. The car ride there he was almost his old self again. I started questioning my decision (and still do). I held him and told him that I loved him and wished that by some maracle he would survive the injection but he didn't. I was there for his last breath and he went to sleep for the last time. everyone asks how I could stay in the room with him and I simply reply that screech was always there for me to show me love when I was sick, hurt or sad and I would be there for him. my husband and I lost it on tuesday adn began to feel sguilty because we could not save him. everyone tells me that it was the right decision and in a way I know that they are right but I want to be selfish right now and I want him with me. I miss him so much that I have to force myself to close my eyes or look at the ceiling when I walk up the stairs because if I don't, I look for him and when I can't find him I lose it all over again. I even found a little tuff of fur that I picked up and placed in my jewerly box to keep. I am having a very hard time right now coming to terms with the fact that he is not here anymore. I hope that by placing this post I can start to heal (if only a little bit). I have read so many other posts for the furkids who have passed on and it gives me hope that someday I won't feels this immense hole in my heart.

Please tells me it gets better because right now I don't thing it will.
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