Lost My Second Baby Monday Morning 1/27 Options

[moon_beam]

Hi, Dave, thank you so much for sharing with us how you and your wife are doing. I'm so wondering how things are going today with Dylan and Darla.

Please let me reassure you that what you are feeling is very normal when you share with us: "I am so excited...but I have mixed feelings. It does not yet feel the same as it did with Ruby and Diamond." I felt the same way several years ago when I adopted my first canine companion Samson - - a mixed Lab / Border Collie from the local shelter. He not only was my precious companion but he also became my "therapy partner" while I went through a very long rehab accompanied by a very dark period of depression. When he joined the angels I felt like I was truly losing myself, but - - 8 months later a Black Lab named Oslo came into my life. Like you, it wasn't the same - - yet I loved Oslo with all my heart - - but differently. Our bond was strong but different. And this is the way it's supposed to be.

Like our human relationships, each one is different because each person we have a relationship with is uniquely different. And so it is with our precious companions. I assure you that you and your new companions will form a very special bond uniquely special and deep - - but different from what you share with your beloved Ruby and Diamond.

I hope today is treating you, and your wife, kindly, Dave, and that you will have a peaceful evening blessed with your beloved Ruby's and Diamond's sweet Living Spirits to comfort you. Please know you and your wife are in my thoughts and prayers, and please let us know how you're doing. And we will look forward to seeing pictures of your new companions.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

[Firehawk]

It's day 3 with the new puppies. I will post pictures. They are so precious. Sunday and Monday morning I felt nervous, wondering what I got myself into, and wondering if I was going to bond with these new pups. But by last night and this morning I'm constantly wondering when I can spend more time with them. I started to really fall in love with them overnight as we had to wake up every 2 hours to let them out since their bladders are so small.

The puppies are beagle/cocker spaniel mix, with some brit spaniel and possibly border collie (per the vet). They are 8-9 weeks old, as guessed by the vet yesterday. The rescue person told us they were about 10 in their best estimate, so the vet thinks based on their teeth they are a bit younger.

They are sister/brother (same litter), and the girl is the smallest of the litter, the boy is the biggest of the litter. It's cute to see them side-by-side. AND THE GIRL IS CLEARLY THE BOSS! She has me melting when she looks at me already. I can't say no to her. She gives me that look all of you women seem to know how to do with us men lol.


Here's a couple photos. I have thousands of them already. They like to snuggle with each other, and crawl on your legs and lay in there. Probably warmer there. The girl is 3 pounds 10 oz. The boy is 6 pounds 4 oz. IT's so cute how they will be hyper active and then on a dime decide they're tired and want to sleep.

We had to break the girl of sleeping all day. We learned Sunday night not to let her sleep during the day, becuase she started getting hyper around 7pm and wouldnt' settle down until about 1am. Also they are crying alot about being in the crate with us in our room, but it is better than when they were in another room. After a few minutes they calm down. They need to adjust to our way of things. Their litter was an 'oops' litter and was dropped off at a kill shelter. The foster person took all 6 of the litter, and was able to adopt them all out in 2 weeks time.

They are so precious. Dudley is the boy, and Darla is the girl. The girl's name was given by the rescuer, but we liked it. We changed the boy's name from Dylan to Dudley, although we really liked Dylan also. My wife works with someone named Dylan whom she doesnt' like so she said we had to change it haha.

I have fallen in love with them aleady. It is a very mixed emotion. The first day and a half I spent it comparing these to my passed away dogs, and the past day or so I have tried to realize I shouldn't compare them, but rather welcome them to my heart as additional members to my family. Makes me get teary typing this part.

I am leaving work a little early today to get home and see them. I cannot wait.

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[moon_beam]

Hi, Dave, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing, and these wonderful pictures of your new family members Dudley and Darla. They are sooooo sweet. I wish Dudley and Darla a long, happy, healthy earthly journey with you and your wife.

I hope today is treating you, your wife, and your precious Dudley and Darla kindly, Dave, and that you will have a peaceful evening blessed with your beloved Ruby's and Diamond's sweet Living Spirits to comfort you. Please know you, your wife, and your precious companions are in my thoughts and prayers, and please let us know how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

[Firehawk]

Moon did you say that you had suffered through depression previously? I have panic attacks and general anxiety. Having dogs helps bring down some of the anxiety, but I still have a lot of panic attacks and have been diagnosed with panic disorder. I continue to avoid taking any drugs for it but I'm starting to think I'm just torturing myself and am considering taking something to take the edge off.

[kk0711]

It's day 3 with the new puppies. I will post pictures. They are so precious. Sunday and Monday morning I felt nervous, wondering what I got myself into, and wondering if I was going to bond with these new pups. But by last night and this morning I'm constantly wondering when I can spend more time with them. I started to really fall in love with them overnight as we had to wake up every 2 hours to let them out since their bladders are so small.

The puppies are beagle/cocker spaniel mix, with some brit spaniel and possibly border collie (per the vet). They are 8-9 weeks old, as guessed by the vet yesterday. The rescue person told us they were about 10 in their best estimate, so the vet thinks based on their teeth they are a bit younger.

They are sister/brother (same litter), and the girl is the smallest of the litter, the boy is the biggest of the litter. It's cute to see them side-by-side. AND THE GIRL IS CLEARLY THE BOSS! She has me melting when she looks at me already. I can't say no to her. She gives me that look all of you women seem to know how to do with us men lol.


Here's a couple photos. I have thousands of them already. They like to snuggle with each other, and crawl on your legs and lay in there. Probably warmer there. The girl is 3 pounds 10 oz. The boy is 6 pounds 4 oz. IT's so cute how they will be hyper active and then on a dime decide they're tired and want to sleep.

We had to break the girl of sleeping all day. We learned Sunday night not to let her sleep during the day, becuase she started getting hyper around 7pm and wouldnt' settle down until about 1am. Also they are crying alot about being in the crate with us in our room, but it is better than when they were in another room. After a few minutes they calm down. They need to adjust to our way of things. Their litter was an 'oops' litter and was dropped off at a kill shelter. The foster person took all 6 of the litter, and was able to adopt them all out in 2 weeks time.

They are so precious. Dudley is the boy, and Darla is the girl. The girl's name was given by the rescuer, but we liked it. We changed the boy's name from Dylan to Dudley, although we really liked Dylan also. My wife works with someone named Dylan whom she doesnt' like so she said we had to change it haha.

I have fallen in love with them aleady. It is a very mixed emotion. The first day and a half I spent it comparing these to my passed away dogs, and the past day or so I have tried to realize I shouldn't compare them, but rather welcome them to my heart as additional members to my family. Makes me get teary typing this part.

I am leaving work a little early today to get home and see them. I cannot wait.

Dave,

Congratulations are your new babies, they are adorable! As someone looking to get two new kittens down the road, I would love to know how you are doing with the new babies and coping with your loss at the same time. We probably won't get new babies until the summer but I am very proud of you for taking that leap of courage, for that is what it really is, and welcoming two new precious lives into your heart.

kk

[Firehawk]

Hi KK,

I don't regret it one second that we got puppies. I have so fallen in love with them over the past 2 days now that it's crazy. I was apprehensive on the day we got them, and into half of the next day. I thought "oh my Gosh what did we get ourselves into?" And i caught myself comparing my passed away dogs to these puppies. It made me realize, just from the shear amount of work it takes to take on 9 week old pups, how calm and relaxed my labs were. I found myself doing too many comparisons, and it was making me sad to do that. So I then ended up thinking to myself that I should not be viewing these pups as replacements, but rather additions to the family. I joked the other day and said that they were the descendants of great labs...just trying to be funny. Monday night and into yesterday I just started falling in love with these puppies and now I am all in.

I would never go back. I found myself texting my wife every 20-30 minutes while I was at work, asking her how they are doing (the dogs, I don't care what my wife is doing hahaha).

The girl, darla, has already established that she is the alpha. She lets her brother tackle her and when he gets a little too tough she will turn from chirping to snarling and he takes off. It's hilarious, because he's like 80% heavier than her. She's 3lb 10oz and he's 6lb 4oz.

I think we have very intelligent puppies. Both of them learned to sit in the first day we had them. I couldn't believe it. The boy, Dudley, doesn't listen as well because he's more hyper, but he listens I'd say 50% of the time with the sit command and gesture. Darla listens about 80% of the time.

We introduced a bell on the patio door handle starting Monday afternoon and apparently Darla has learned in 24 hours what the bell is for. Yesterday she was playing with her brother, suddenly stopped, trotted to the patio door (about 30 feet away) and hit the bell. We let her out and she went poop and pee on the patio. My jaw dropped. I didn't know a puppy could learn somtehing that fast. She's done it twice, and her brother has done it once.

They aren't perfect, they are still having accidents in the house of course, but they are learning. Every time they go outside they try to pee and/or poop. So they've clearly learned what we want them to do out there. But they still think it's ok to go in the house, so we have to really be pre-emptive with them, otherwise they'll wander off out of the play area and go potty. We keep trying to get streaks going on how many times we can successfully get them to go outside before we slip up and they go in the house. We've gotten up to 3 straight times, but then usually we let a little too much time go by or are talking and one of them wanders to the outer area of the room and goes.

They are really social, and brave. I had these baby gates that cut off access to hallways, for 10 years and my labs never even so much as challenged them once. Dudley figured out how to get through it the first day we tried to use the gate. LOL Then Darla saw him do it and she did it. Darla likes to sleep alot. We are trying to keep her awake more during the day and let her go nuts late evening so she sleeps better in her crate through the night. If you are sitting on the floor with them, she will try to get on your lap and cuddle up and fall asleep. Then Dudley will come full speed and jump and try to do the same. It's so cute.

We are going to definitely need to make sure they are trained well. Beagles are great dogs and are notorious for getting into everything and following their nose everywhere. But that's what I wanted, smart, social dogs. So I'm very happy. The vet said we shouldn't let them sleep with us in bed until about 1 year old, when we trust them fully and they are matured. I can't wait for that, but at the same time I'm enjoying every moment of raising them. It's keeping me up alot at night, having to wake up every 2-3 hours to put them out because their bladders are so small, but it's worth it. I'll look back at these memories and miss this. I didn't even take my jacket off all of Monday because they have togo out about every 30-45 minutes right now when we are home during the day, and they are active.

[moon_beam]

Hi, Dave, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing. It is sooo wonderful to share your news that you and your wife are enjoying your precious Dudley and Darla. There is no doubt that your precious Ruby and Diamond led your and your wife's paths to Dudley and Darla, and they are doing a "happy dance" in heaven in having a little brother and sister now in the family.

To answer your question: "Moon did you say that you had suffered through depression previously?" - - yes, several years ago I experienced a very difficult part in my life that included a deep depression. I sought professional counseling to help me work through the challenges, but the only thing the counselor I had at that time wanted to do was to put me on drugs. I tried medications but they only made the problem worse. I finally received a referral to a counselor who actually took the time to LISTEN to me. He, too, suggested that I try medication again but I refused. Instead of turning me away, he agreed to counsel me but if he did not see any improvement he would insist that I try medication again. I agreed to this compromise, and as it turned out I never needed to try medication again. As a part of the counseling, I was taught how to re-direct my thoughts when I began to have panic attacks and flashbacks. It is a technique that takes a LOT of effort, and it does work.

However, there are times when medication is helpful. The brain is comprised of many different chemicals that work together to keep the body and mind in good health. Many things can cause a chemical imbalance in the brain - - epilepsy, a head injury, a stroke, stress, change of life, etc.. When this happens, the brain can benefit from medications that are designed to compensate for the chemical imbalance. Many years ago, prior to the traumatic event that included a deep depression, I was in a difficult situation at work that was causing me to experience symptoms of extreme stress. I spoke to my doctor about the situation, and he prescribed a very mild tranquilizer to help me cope while the problem was being resolved. Thankfully I did not need the medication for very long, but it was helpful when the stress was more than what I could handle. So, my suggestion is to talk to your doctor about what you are experiencing and take it from there. I hope what I have shared with you is helpful.

I hope today is treating you, your wife, and your precious Dudley and Darla kindly, Dave, and that you will have a peaceful evening blessed with your beloved Ruby's and Diamond's sweet Living Spirits to comfort you. Please know you, your wife, and your precious companions are in my thoughts and prayers, and please let us know how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

[Firehawk]

Darla appears to have a little bit of congestion of sniffling. This morning she was sort of sneezing/sniffling as if she had a stuffy nose. I had a very stuffy nose myself this morning, and am wondering if it's the weather here. But anyways, now that I'm very overprotective and worried about them both, I called the vet, and they suggeseted to bring her in. She's very young and doesn't have a strong immune system yet and so I don't want to take any chances.

My mother went there during the day already to let them out of the crate and go potty, and she said she heard her cough once but that was it. She was going through short little bouts of it this morning, but was otherwise hyper and playful.

Also, she likes to sleep alot. When we are at home during the afternoon/evening she seems to want to sleep, more than her brother. I am also concerned a little about that. I'll bring it up to the vet today. That might just be her personality, or maybe she's playing catchup and her body is hitting a growth spurt right now and needs the sleep. She's so precious. If you sit down on the floor she will come over and climb up on your legs and cuddle up and want to go to sleep on you. She is going to be a great cuddler when we start letting them sleep with us in bed.

I can't wait. Dudley is bouncing off the wall more. He's hyper, then decides he's going to collapse and fall asleep for about 20 minutes, then he's up again and hyper.

We have been keeping Darla up, or trying to, during the late afternoon/early evening to keep her from getting hyper as we are ready to go to bed. It happened the first night we had her, and she was up until 2am bouncing off the wall. We don't want that. But maybe we are hindering her proper sleeping habits by doing this. I will also ask this at the vet.

[Firehawk]

It's been a long week. I know we will look back on this week and smile, but these puppies are a FULL TIME job. The boy Dudley gets into EVERYTHING. He grabbed one of my wife's dress boots and started running around the house with it. It was funny but it was also like "come on dude". This morning I had the worst thing happen.

The snow is starting to melt here, and Dudley and Darla are starting to jump over the snow walls I built and they started running toward the privacy fence. The fence has a big enough gap in some places that they could squirt easily under it. I hvae to put some chicken fence around the entire yard at some point. But anyway, this morning it was icy, and they both managed to get over the 'snow wall' i made and I had to catch both of them quickly. As I hvae both in my hand, I stepped back over the snow wall onto the patio, slipped, and dropped Darla from about a height of 3 feet. She cried for about 30 seconds straight. It was something daddy didn't want to hear! I started to panic, thinking I just killed her or seriously injured her. But after a few minutes she started to play again. I watched close to see if she had any limps or anything but she didn't. My wife checked her pupils to make sure they dilated. She fell on the patio on her side, and came down pretty flat. I think i twas the shock of it that scared her so much, but I never want to hear her cry like that again.

I thought I seroiusly had hurt her. I cried on the way into work. I was worried ALL DAY. My wife called me every half hour for the next 2 hours and told me she was playing and didn't seem hurt. She was very active all day and seems happy. I swear if I ever did anything that hurt these dogs seriously I would not be able to live with myself. I still feel so bad about it. I know it was an accident, but gee wizz. I thought "oh my god we have had them for 5 days and I already killed one".

At lunch today i bought a bunch of chicken wire and built a pen for them around the patio with some grass area so they can have some room to run, but can't get out into the main yard and risk getting under the privacy fence. In the spring I will need to get some shorter chicken wire and put it all the way around the privacy fence, then they can have full run of the yard.

Darla seems to have picked up a cold or something. She has been sneezing since 2 nights ago. We took her into the vet and they said she seems to be checking out ok, but put her on an antiboitic in case it's the start of kennel cough, or just a cold she picked up. I am not taking ANY risks with her.

ALl I need is to lose another animal in a span of 14 months. My wife told me that most babies roll off something at some point, or fall, or whatever, and animals/humans are resiliant, so not to worry.

But I do worry. They're my kids.

[kk0711]

Hi KK,

I don't regret it one second that we got puppies. I have so fallen in love with them over the past 2 days now that it's crazy. I was apprehensive on the day we got them, and into half of the next day. I thought "oh my Gosh what did we get ourselves into?" And i caught myself comparing my passed away dogs to these puppies. It made me realize, just from the shear amount of work it takes to take on 9 week old pups, how calm and relaxed my labs were. I found myself doing too many comparisons, and it was making me sad to do that. So I then ended up thinking to myself that I should not be viewing these pups as replacements, but rather additions to the family. I joked the other day and said that they were the descendants of great labs...just trying to be funny. Monday night and into yesterday I just started falling in love with these puppies and now I am all in.

I would never go back. I found myself texting my wife every 20-30 minutes while I was at work, asking her how they are doing (the dogs, I don't care what my wife is doing hahaha).

The girl, darla, has already established that she is the alpha. She lets her brother tackle her and when he gets a little too tough she will turn from chirping to snarling and he takes off. It's hilarious, because he's like 80% heavier than her. She's 3lb 10oz and he's 6lb 4oz.

I think we have very intelligent puppies. Both of them learned to sit in the first day we had them. I couldn't believe it. The boy, Dudley, doesn't listen as well because he's more hyper, but he listens I'd say 50% of the time with the sit command and gesture. Darla listens about 80% of the time.

We introduced a bell on the patio door handle starting Monday afternoon and apparently Darla has learned in 24 hours what the bell is for. Yesterday she was playing with her brother, suddenly stopped, trotted to the patio door (about 30 feet away) and hit the bell. We let her out and she went poop and pee on the patio. My jaw dropped. I didn't know a puppy could learn somtehing that fast. She's done it twice, and her brother has done it once.

They aren't perfect, they are still having accidents in the house of course, but they are learning. Every time they go outside they try to pee and/or poop. So they've clearly learned what we want them to do out there. But they still think it's ok to go in the house, so we have to really be pre-emptive with them, otherwise they'll wander off out of the play area and go potty. We keep trying to get streaks going on how many times we can successfully get them to go outside before we slip up and they go in the house. We've gotten up to 3 straight times, but then usually we let a little too much time go by or are talking and one of them wanders to the outer area of the room and goes.

They are really social, and brave. I had these baby gates that cut off access to hallways, for 10 years and my labs never even so much as challenged them once. Dudley figured out how to get through it the first day we tried to use the gate. LOL Then Darla saw him do it and she did it. Darla likes to sleep alot. We are trying to keep her awake more during the day and let her go nuts late evening so she sleeps better in her crate through the night. If you are sitting on the floor with them, she will try to get on your lap and cuddle up and fall asleep. Then Dudley will come full speed and jump and try to do the same. It's so cute.

We are going to definitely need to make sure they are trained well. Beagles are great dogs and are notorious for getting into everything and following their nose everywhere. But that's what I wanted, smart, social dogs. So I'm very happy. The vet said we shouldn't let them sleep with us in bed until about 1 year old, when we trust them fully and they are matured. I can't wait for that, but at the same time I'm enjoying every moment of raising them. It's keeping me up alot at night, having to wake up every 2-3 hours to put them out because their bladders are so small, but it's worth it. I'll look back at these memories and miss this. I didn't even take my jacket off all of Monday because they have togo out about every 30-45 minutes right now when we are home during the day, and they are active.

Thanks for sharing all the fun you are having with the pups, Dave! Sounds like you and your wife have your hands full, lol! Are you experiencing any guilt or is just having the new babies around is like a living memorial to your other fur babies? My husband can't even think about new kittens but I think we will be ready by the early summer.
kk

[Firehawk]

Thanks for sharing all the fun you are having with the pups, Dave! Sounds like you and your wife have your hands full, lol! Are you experiencing any guilt or is just having the new babies around is like a living memorial to your other fur babies? My husband can't even think about new kittens but I think we will be ready by the early summer.
kk

No guilt. The first day, day and a half I noticed I was comparing these guys to my labs. And sometimes I still do, but it's more like something they do that reminds me of my labs. But I quickly realized I wasn't replacing Ruby and Diamond because no matter what dog I get I can't ever replace them. They all have their own personalities like us humans. I just started viewing these puppies as new additions to the family, and I still consider Ruby and Diamond family that has passed on. On the second day, in the evening, I went from being apprehensive, to falling completely in love with them. I am so in love with these puppies. All my love for Diamond spilled into these puppies now. I just want to protect them and give them everything. They have brought so much more life into this house. My wife was saying the same thing today. We really missed it.

They're a handful right now because we can't leave them alone for a second, but they are worth it, and I"ll look back on these as fond memories.

You and your husband will get a new pet when you are ready. When i first started posting here I think I probably posted that there was no way I could get another animal and go through that loss again. But, I'm glad I did. Too many dogs need a good home and part of me feels obligated, because I am a dog lover, always have been all my life, and too many dogs are discarded every day. I would take them all in if I could.

I guess one of the wonderful hidden things about life is that because there's the risk of losing someone you love, you will cherish it more. I have spent every non working, non sleeping moment with these puppies since we got them over a week ago now. It is wonderful. Some of the things they do playing together reminds me of Ruby and Diamond when they were puppies, and that makes me want to cry, but in a good way. The memories make me smile, and bring a tear to my eye at the same time.

I haven't had a male dog since I was about 8 yrs old either, so having a boy who appears like he's gonna be my 'buddy' and do everything with me, is wonderful. The girl is so sweet. She wants to cuddle up every chance she gets, until she gets hyper haha. She's going to be daddy's little girl, for sure. She's already got me whipped.

[moon_beam]

Hi, Dave, thank you so much for sharing with us how you and your precious Dudley and Darla are doing. I can soooo understand your concern and worry for Darla when she fell from your arms. Accidents DO happen, but that still doesn't diminish the fear, horror, worry, and concern we have for their well being.

I hope today is treating you and your wife, and your precious Dudley and Darla kindly, Dave, and that you will have a peaceful evening blessed with your beloved Ruby's and Diamond's sweet Living Spirits to comfort you. Please know you, your wife, and your precious Dudley and Darla are in my thoughts and prayers, and please let us know how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

[kk0711]

No guilt. The first day, day and a half I noticed I was comparing these guys to my labs. And sometimes I still do, but it's more like something they do that reminds me of my labs. But I quickly realized I wasn't replacing Ruby and Diamond because no matter what dog I get I can't ever replace them. They all have their own personalities like us humans. I just started viewing these puppies as new additions to the family, and I still consider Ruby and Diamond family that has passed on. On the second day, in the evening, I went from being apprehensive, to falling completely in love with them. I am so in love with these puppies. All my love for Diamond spilled into these puppies now. I just want to protect them and give them everything. They have brought so much more life into this house. My wife was saying the same thing today. We really missed it.

They're a handful right now because we can't leave them alone for a second, but they are worth it, and I"ll look back on these as fond memories.

You and your husband will get a new pet when you are ready. When i first started posting here I think I probably posted that there was no way I could get another animal and go through that loss again. But, I'm glad I did. Too many dogs need a good home and part of me feels obligated, because I am a dog lover, always have been all my life, and too many dogs are discarded every day. I would take them all in if I could.

I guess one of the wonderful hidden things about life is that because there's the risk of losing someone you love, you will cherish it more. I have spent every non working, non sleeping moment with these puppies since we got them over a week ago now. It is wonderful. Some of the things they do playing together reminds me of Ruby and Diamond when they were puppies, and that makes me want to cry, but in a good way. The memories make me smile, and bring a tear to my eye at the same time.

I haven't had a male dog since I was about 8 yrs old either, so having a boy who appears like he's gonna be my 'buddy' and do everything with me, is wonderful. The girl is so sweet. She wants to cuddle up every chance she gets, until she gets hyper haha. She's going to be daddy's little girl, for sure. She's already got me whipped.

Thanks, Dave. I am so happy for you and your wife and can imagine how much of a handful 2 Beagle pups are! They sound really smart and a lot of fun X2

I hope Darla is getting over her cough and thanks for sharing about your accident. I am afraid I will be the total helicopter mom when I get kittens, I lost my Ari so young and so unexpectedly and cats re really good at hiding when they're sick....I hope that I will have some time off this summer and be able to spend some time with the kittens. I always felt bad that Ari was an "only" so having two will be good.
Take care and thanks for your good thoughts on your memories of Ruby and Diamond when you are with the puppies, it is sweet and makes sense.

kk