Murfy, My Beautiful Silver Persian Options

[Inessence]

It's been one week ago tonight. I miss him so much. Been thinking a lot about death and dying and the finality of it all. After a 5 hour marathon crying session last night, a thought finally calmed me and allowed me to sleep--Drawing up my own Will and Testament. This afternoon I downloaded the paperwork and began the process.

Tuesday, I finally get to pick up Murfy's ashes. I had called them today. They never bothered to let me know they were ready. I got him a beautiful urn. The color even matches his coat. I'll post a pic if I can find one online, or take a photo after I pick him up tomorrow.

[moon_beam]

Hi, Inessence, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing. Getting our beloved companion's ashes back is a two-sided coin: one side is the relief of having them back with us where they belong while the other side is yet another "reality check" that they are no longer with us in the physical form our hearts long for them to be. I hope you will find comfort in having your beloved Murfy's ashes home with you.

The physical loss of a beloved companion does make us more aware of how fragile and finite our physical bodies are. There really is a comfort in drawing up a Will because it helps us to focus on how we want to be remembered - - it is an expression of how we live through our earthly journey of what is important to us. And a Will is not engraved in stone - - it can be changed as we grow and mature in our experiences.

I hope today is treating you kindly, Inessence, and that you will have a peaceful evening blessed with your beloved Murfy's sweet Living Spirit to comfort you. I will look forward to sharing a picture of your beloved Murfy's urn whenever possible. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, Inessence, and look forward to knowing how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

[Inessence]

moon beam, here is a link to the identical urn I have for my beautiful boy. http://php2.secure-shopping.com/angelsdest...?productid=1534

It has a white and silver marble swirl pattern that almost matches his fur. <3

[moon_beam]

Hi, Inessence, thank you so much for sharing the beautiful urn you have selected for your beloved Murfy. I hope that every time you look at it your heart will be comforted.

I hope today is treating you kindly, Inessence, and that you are finding comfort in having your beloved Murfy's ashes back home with you. I hope you will have a peaceful evening blessed with your beloved Murfy's sweet Living Spirit to comfort you. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, Inessence, and look forward to knowing how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

[Inessence]

Today it's been two weeks since I've had my boy with me. I still subconsciously expect to see him every time I enter or leave a room. I'm still waiting for his soft fur to brush against my face as he moves to curl up on my chest just over my heart.

Camelot - Before I Gaze at You Again
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hr9Fopyrofo...be_gdata_player

[Inessence]

Just watched this clip http://videosift.com/video/Futurama-Frys-D...-Ending-and-Sad and the beautiful song accompanying it. Now I'm sitting at my desk with tears streaming. I miss my boo so much.

[moon_beam]

Hi, Inessence, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing. During the deep grief it seems our "survival" are measured by the minutes, hours, days, weeks, months - - and years - - of our adjustment to the physical separation from our beloved companions - - whoever the life form. But each minute, hour, day, week, month - - and year - - are living testimonies to the eternal love we share with them - - to the eternal love you share with your beloved Murfy. It is important to not look down the "future" road right now but to just focus on the moment at hand. I promise you one day when you least expect it your heart will be comforted in knowing that your beloved Murfy continues to share your earthly journey - - that he is forever IN your heart - - he is always and forever a heartbeat close to you.

I hope today is treating you kindly, Inessence, and that you will have a peaceful evening blessed with your beloved Murfy's sweet Living Spirit to comfort you. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, and that I look forward to knowing how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

[Inessence]

Yesterday marked one month since I lost him. Today, I went shopping and "I Will Remember You" by Sarah McLachlan came on over the loudspeaker music. It is another song I ruminate over while thinking about my boy. I left the store in tears in the middle of the song.

[moon_beam]

Hi, Inessence, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing and your and your beloved Murfy's one month angel-versary. The first year of adjustment to the physical absence of our beloved companions is one of the hardest experiences we will know, for every moment of every hour of every day of every week of every month is a constant reminder of not having their precious physical presence with us and adjusting to the "first withouts". Even after several years for me there are still some songs that I cannot listen to all the way through without a mist coming to my eyes and a quiver to my chin - - but now these moments are not quite so painful. I know right now this seems impossible for your heart to believe, but I promise you one day when you least expect you will be thinking of your beloved Murfy or listening to a song that brings a treasured memory to mind and your heart will once again be able to smile - - even if there is a tear on your cheek.

For now, Inessence, I hope you know you are surrounded by each of us on this wonderful forum who truly know what you are feeling and are offering you our collective and individual strength, encouragement, and support to help you through your adjustment journey.

I hope today is treating you kindly, Inessence, and that you will have a peaceful evening blessed with your beloved Murfy's sweet Living Spirit to comfort you. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, and that I look forward to knowing how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

[DannysMom]

Yesterday marked one month since I lost him. Today, I went shopping and "I Will Remember You" by Sarah McLachlan came on over the loudspeaker music. It is another song I ruminate over while thinking about my boy. I left the store in tears in the middle of the song.

Inessence, the first month is probably the hardest. It will take time to adjust to the "new normal" and life without Murfy. I know what you mean about that song. I heard it after I lost my Danny and it made me cry too. I hope today is treating you kindly.

[Inessence]

Thank you moonbeam and DannysMom. "Life without Murfy" became more tangibly real today after laundering my darks. I don't know if you've ever lived with a white Persian, but their hair gets EVERYWHERE. It took a couple of launders, but today I noticed hardly any hair in the lint catcher, or more remarkably, on my clothes. It was very bittersweet.

[DannysMom]

Inessence, thank you for letting us know how you're doing. I've never had a long-haired cat, but even my short-haired ones left plenty of fur around. After my Danny died I didn't even vacuum for a while, because I couldn't stand the thought of vacuuming up his fur and having it gone, so I know how you feel about seeing less and less of your Murfy's fur in the lint catcher. Did he liked getting brushed? He had such a beautiful coat.

[Inessence]

Inessence, thank you for letting us know how you're doing. I've never had a long-haired cat, but even my short-haired ones left plenty of fur around. After my Danny died I didn't even vacuum for a while, because I couldn't stand the thought of vacuuming up his fur and having it gone, so I know how you feel about seeing less and less of your Murfy's fur in the lint catcher. Did he liked getting brushed? He had such a beautiful coat.

Hi DannysMom,

Murfy liked being brushed only on his back and belly. His hind legs and tail he hated having done. Today is the anniversary of week 7 without him. I'm only now really starting to feel his absence. Like, it's finally becoming 'real' and not just a bad dream.

[moon_beam]

Hi, Inessence, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing, and your and your beloved Murfy's 7 week angel-versary.

When we experience a traumatic event in our lives - - and the physical loss of a beloved companion qualifies as a traumatic event - - our minds and bodies go into an automatic "survival" state which includes shock as a means of protecting us from becoming so overwhelmed by the "reality" of what has happened. As the shock diminishes we are faced with a new level of "reality" to process - - which is why now you are feeling like the physical absence of your beloved Murfy is "finally becoming 'real' and not just a bad dream." And this is yet another reason why this grief adjustment journey is one of the hardest experiences we will know on this side of eternity - - for it is a journey that can only be traveled in our own way in our own time.

I am so smiling at how your beloved Murfy enjoyed being brushed, and I can relate to your clothing being "fur catchers" of your beloved Murfy's beautiful white fur. My beloved beautiful baby girl Abbygayle had long thick luxurious grey fur and she, too, enjoyed being brushed - - except for her pantaloons. People at work would often comment on my clothes donning her beautiful grey fur and I would think to myself how lucky I am to carry the evidence of her with me wherever I go. After every brushing I would clean the brush and put her fur in a plastic baggie to keep - - so I still have her beautiful fur as a treasured memory of her earthly journey with me.

It will seem that each day of this grief adjustment journey brings a new awareness that your beloved Murfy is no longer physically with you. I truly wish there were an easier way to navigate this grief journey, Inessence, but unfortunately I do not know of one. This is one of the reasons why I stress it is important for you to know you are not alone in your journey - - for this grieving can make one feel very alone and isolated. We are here for you, Inessence, to share with you every step of your journey - - the not so bad days, the days that seem to be fairly decent, and the days when the deep sorrow seems to be more than what your heart can bear.

I hope today is treating you kindly, Inessence, and that you will have a peaceful evening blessed with your beloved Murfy's sweet Living Spirit to comfort you. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, and that I look forward to knowing how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

[Inessence]

moon_beam, I love that you have so much of fur saved. Although, if I saved all that he'd shedded through the years I'm sure I could knit a King-Sized comforter! Nothing, and I mean nothing sheds like a Silver Persian. It literally just hangs in the air. I used to shop for clothing based on whether or not it was a 'Murfy-hair magnet'

I did get a lock of Murfy's hair saved as a momento. I had to ask my Mom to cut it for me while he was sick because it was to painful for me to do it. Just yesterday, I was cleaning underneath the couch cushions and found a kitty claw and wondered if it was Murfy's. And whether or not to save it. (I didn't.)

[Inessence]

Just stopping by to pay homage to the 6th month mark without my "Boo".

Today, I finally mustered up the courage to put his collar in his urn. The dog went crazy sniffing at the collar after I brought it out. I also finally changed the profile picture on my Facebook page back to an actual photo of me.

[Inessence]

So tomorrow marks the 1-year deathaversary of my beautiful boy, Murfy. I've been dreading this date like a Mother dreads giving her child's age in 'years'. It just feels like my baby is getting further away from me. I know tomorrow is going to be a really sad day.

Almost 1 year to the day I lost my first cat Pooky, and 6 months after Murfy passed, my 15 year old last surviving kitty, Sassy, suddenly went blind. First they thought high-blood pressure or a stroke, but over the past six months she's been diagnosed with a probable brain tumor. I haven't written about it yet because she's still eating and in good health, but her eye-sight is likely lost for good. I currently have her on blood-pressure meds, chinese herbs, and she's receiving acupuncture from a holistic vet.

Just before Sassy's blindness, I rescued another kitty from the Humane Society. He is a black Persian named "Brave". See pic.



Thanks for listening. I just keep coming back here to express my thoughts.

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[moon_beam]

Hi, Inessence, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing, and your and your beloved Murfy's 1 year angel-versary. Just because the calendar commemorates an event such as when your beloved Murfy joined the angels, it does not mean that the sorrow of not having his sweet precious physical presence with you automatically and magically disappears. Rather, it simply means that you have endured the first year of one of the most painful experiences you will ever know on this side of eternity, and hopefully you are beginning to be able to remember your beloved Murfy with a happier heart.

Thank you so much for sharing with us how your precious Sassy is doing. Cancer is such an incidious illness, and I am so very sorry that you and your precious Sassy are having to travel this journey at all, and particularly so close after losing the physical presence of your beloved Pooky and Murfy. I am so glad she seems to be doing well with her BP medication, her holistic treatments and herbal medicines. Even though her sight is impaired, she has the loving comfort and reassurance that you are there for her - - and this makes all the difference in the world in her ability to adjust without her vision. Please let us know how she's doing, Inessence. We are here for you.

And thank you so much for sharing your new family member with us, - - your precious Brave. What a handsome lad he is!!! I hope he and Sassy are good friends, and that little Brave will become Sassy's "guide" and comforter.

I hope today is treating you and your precious Sassy and Brave kindly, Inessence, and that you will have a peaceful evening blessed with your beloved Pooky's and Murfy's sweet Living Spirits to comfort you. Please know you and your precious Sassy and Brave are in my thoughts and prayers, and please let us know how each of you are doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

[Inessence]

Thank you moon beam. And thank you again for being here for us.

[Inessence]

Today marks the 2nd year without my Murfy. Sitting here crying at my desk.