I Set A Date, miserable Options

[juls]

My 10 year old pug Daisy Mae is going fast of a spinal degenerative disease that affects the brain. In the past week she has gone from tinkling here & there to losing all control of her bowels & bladder. She also won't hobble into the grass anymore & just sits straight down when I take her outside...when last week she was hobbling all over the back yard. I say hobble because she hasnt been able to walk correctly for a long time.

I took her to the vet for a last ditch attempt to make her better but there is nothing that can be done. The vet told me she's in the last stages, that soon she will be completly paralyzed from the mid-back down...and then her organs will start shutting down. After doing a lot of hysterical bawling last night & looking at her photograph book from the last 10 years, I realized the quality of her life is terrible. She was such a vibrant, sassy...full of personality baby and now she sits on her pillow in diapers & looks miserable. I think I've taken her as far as she can go and at this point I'm just being selfish keeping her w/me.

I've decided that I'll let her go next friday (nov. 11). I'm going to take off work a couple days since I'll be useless. I'm going to give her the best last week on earth. I'm going to feed her all her favorite people foods & carry her out to her favorite parks & just let her sit there & enjoy.

I realize I'm blessed to be able to do this....I know a lot of you had no choice in the matter and that is so terrible. I still can't stop crying though, and I'm already grieving horribly......I would love to hear from you guys.....and any advice is much appreciated and if I'm doing this all wrong please let me know that too.
Love,
Juls

[luv_my_catz]

Juls,

You are a dear sweet person who is totally and unconditionally loving toward your sweet Pugsy ~ You are doing NOTHING wrong ~ to follow ones heart and honor your sweet pet with dignity and courage is such a brave and totally loving thing to do ~ I can envision the park ~ the breeze ~ all the favorite things ~ the best food ~ this is the seat of the soul the stuff that makes us magic creations of God ~ to stand strong in the fire of despair armored with love and a passionate courage to ensure that your sweet Pugsy has the glofication of her soul now and as she passes WITH you and your spirit ~ across the bridge of timelessness ~ as you reach the next level of your souls journey together ~ God Speed ~ You are in my prayers ~ Kathryn

[juls]

{{{{katherine}}}}} bless you for your beautiful words. (crying)

[SJ J & S]

The only advise i can add to what youve allready decided to do is try to hold the tears.

Not something i normally recommend but I remember Judes last days and the concern she was showing because Ian just wouldnt stop crying.

Ill be thinking of you and sending you love and angel blessings.

Love Sue

[juls]

Dear Sue,
I know what your saying. Daisy knows I'm really upset....and oddly enough I know that makes her uneasy. Thanks for your kind words.

[pamurchu]

What a heartfelt post. Your best friend was so lucky to have had you throughout the years. Take mental pictures of your last days in the park, and how you spoiled Daisy. I wish I could have sent off my Bailey in such a sentimental, unselfish way. You will be in my thoughts and prayers on November 11. Take care.

[artchick]

Putting aside your own saddness to be with your pet in her time of passing is a beautiful thing to do and one that you will not regret. It may also help you in your time of grief when your sweet girl lets go of the physical world to know you gave her all she could want in her final days. I took two days off from work when Moses our little rescue dog was in his dying process. I held him and loved him, I gave him the bacon off my breakfast sandwich, I carried him in to the yard and sat with him in the beautiful autumn sun and under the full moon. I held him when he took his last breath. And I won't lie and say that it eased the pain to be with him, but I will say I am honored to have shared his life with him and his passing. I believe that we had a deep soul connection and this was definetly part of the path. I learned so much about the aging and dying process from Moe and it removed a lot of fear...he was peaceful and accepting of his quality of his changing life which was simply put...old. I learned to accept death in a healthy way vs. being devestated as I was when we lost our first pet in March. I miss him terribly and wish to hold him and snuggle with him every single day but I realize that he was old and it was his time to leave. It was an honor to be his mom and I feel very blessed to have shared so much love with him in his final days. Please remember that death is as much a part of life as living and try not to be too sad but to be in the flow of your last days together in physical form.....soon she will be an angel and with you always in spirit.
I send you so much love and peace as you begin your week of hospice care.
peace and blessings
angela

[applepiejo]

Dear Juls
Today I have to do the same thing for my beloved Wicket, he too is suffering from the awful spinal condition, and it sounds like he is at the same stage as Daisy. Had him 14 1/2 years was a rescue dog and at least 2 years old when he chose us Our two children followed him (he didn't show an ounce of jealousy) and he has been a big part of this family. We moved from the city to the country 2 years ago and his first meeting with a cow was a true moment to behold, didn't know wether to sniff, run, bark or whimper !
However, the children don't know what is too happen today, on their return from school , we will have to break the news, I think I'm trying to greive so I can support them through their loss.
I'm trying the 'Don't be sad it ended, be glad it happened' route but I guess I should really just go with the flow.
I am just dreading seeing that empty basket tomorrow morning.
Juls, thinking of you today.
Jo