Seems Like It Keeps Getting More Difficult Options

[BonniesMom]

I lost my little Bonnie Lou, my twelve-year-old Yorkie, to kidney failure on July 30th. It seems like I'm having a harder time with this now than I was when it happened. I don't know, maybe the reality is sinking in now because for a while it just didn't seem real. But now I'm missing her worse than ever and having terrible dreams about her being gone. Everyone else has moved on and I feel worse. My husband says he hasn't had a hard time with this at all, which made me feel like he was being disloyal to Bonnie, because he really was very close to her. Her littermate, Belinda, has pretty much stopped looking for her and seems to have adjusted. But that's good because I've heard of things like this affecting the other pet's health and I wouldn't want that. I am not ready to move on or stop grieving because she was one of the best things I ever had in my life. She never brought me anything but happiness. I'm just wondering if it's normal to feel worse about her death now than I did two months ago.
Also, I would really like to be able to rescue another pet for Belinda to have company and also because I am used to having multiple dogs. But my husband says we can't afford to and I don't think he wants to. I think it would be a great way to honor Bonnie's life to give a good home to a pet in need and I think it would be good for Belinda to have a companion because she's never been the only pet until now. But I guess that will have to wait.
Has anyone else experienced this, that the grief seems to get worse with time instead of better?