Puddin .... Our Little Man! Options

[PuddinsMum]

I am a new member to this forum and I just want to say THANKYOU for it being here! I lost my Puddin Saturday morning and spent the whole of Saturday night on here, reading all your beautiful words and poems. I cannot tell you how much that helped me ... just by knowing, I am not on my own and there are others that feel the exact same way I do. I appreciate it so much! I don't know what I would've done without your wisdoms!

Puddin' was our 'darling' that we rescued from the Humane Society - I will never forget our first meeting. I was looking through all the cages, opening the doors and loving each cat individually .... when I came upon, Puddin .... I opened the door to introduce myself, when he got up on his hind legs and put each of his paws on my shoulders, kind of like grabbing and hugging me ... that was it, that was my boy after that! I can remember thinking how beautiful he was and I just couldn't believe that someone would abandon him! He was still a kitten at that time but you could tell by the size of his paws and nose that he was going to be BIG!

Everyone that came to our house was scared of him (makes me smile to think that) .... but after a visit or two, they would see what a beautiful and gentle creature he was. No one could believe how big he was too .... but if you saw how much he ate ... you would believe it We 'tried' to make him an indoor cat ... but everytime the kids would leave the door open, he was GONE ..... I spent the most of one summer, running after him .... in the end, I gave up, he knew what he wanted and no one was going to stop him! He was the dominant cat of the neighbourhood, he would lay on the roofs of our cars, assessing and watching what was going on ... if there was a fight, Puddin was normally in it! He would protect our other baby girl "Angel" who would give him a 'lick' of thanks when he would come back in the house. He was such a 'toughy' outside but in our home, he was the gentlest cat ever. When my daughter was 3, she would sometimes pull at his hair or mess with him, he would just sit there and not do a thing.. I would say for him to move but he was so patient, so loving and so beautiful. When his food bowl was empty, he would rub his big body around your legs so you couldn't walk! If he was hungry in the middle of the night, he would go and bite my youngest daughter on her cheek to wake her up, she only told me this Saturday, when she asked me "Why did Puddin use to bite my cheek in the night?", it made me smile, he was such a character! I knew what he was doing .... he would do the same thing to my 10 yr old daughter too! Pudding loved a lovin' .... so much that he would dribble puddles all over you! Then get so excited, and nip you

Last Thursday, he came in from outside and didn't go to his food bowl ... I KNEW something was wrong. That just wasn't Pud Pud. I had to go help a friend, so I left the house for a couple of hours. Upon my return, I found Pud Pud on my bedroom floor panting ... he was walking from room to room and seemed like he couldnt relax. I phoned my Mum in the UK and told her what was happening and she said, if he is panting, that normally means he is in pain! Not my Pud! I phoned the vets straight away and my hubby came home from work. We got to the vets and they told us he had a blocked uretha, if he didnt have the op/catheter, he would die. They said it was quite common in male cats. A male cat came in with the same problem at the time we were there. He would probably be coming out Friday or Saturday. I left thinking he is safe now, our baby will be home soon. I went back to see him in the afternoon and he just didn't look good at all, just laying there with no life in his eyes. The other cat, was up and trying to get his neck collar off. This scared me. I thought it was common and not serious. Friday night, I spent the night on the Internet researching FLUTD - Blocked Urethra and found that it is very serious.

Saturday morning, we had to make the very painful decision of euthanasia, Puddins muscles was not doing what they should be doing and he could no longer go to the bathroom by himself. I have so much guilt it is painful, I cannot believe I missed the signs that were there! If I would have caught this earlier, Puddin would still be here. Now, I am an expert on it .... and would definitely know the signs but up until Puddin became sick, I had never heard of this in cats? I am no longer feeding Angel dried commercial cat food and am loving her as much as I can. I know she misses her little boy Pud (Angel is 12 years old and Puddin was 4). I am also having problems with my Yorkie, Tootsie, she knew Puddin was sick the morning I took him to the vets and now she sits on her Doggy Couch looking out the window looking for him ... I am not sure what I can do to help her .... apart from hugs n cuddles!

I apologise if my writing is 'all over the place' ... my mind is not 100% right now. I thankyou all for being here, I cannot tell you what a lovely site this is. It is very hard to talk about your love of a pet with many people ... because it seems, they 'just don't get it' ..... My life has been enriched by Puddin's love and I will never forget him. He was one our babies and always will be .... I love you so much Pud Pud! There willl never be another one like you - irreplacable!

Love n Hugz to all!

Jayne, Tootsie & Angel.

[PuddinsMum]

Hi Kathleen,

Thankyou for your reply - Shiloh was the same age as Puddin - it just seems to young, so many good years ahead. I had two kittykats, Puddin and Angel who is 12, so it was only natural to believe I had many more glorious years with Puddin. It comes as a complete shock when they are this young, I wasn't expecting anything like this He was always so tough!

I had never heard of FLUTD Kathleen, till last Thursday. If looking back now to last Thursday, instinctly, I knew Puddin was ready for his 'sleep', it was only with the false hope that the vet gave me, that made me turn around and think he would be coming home ... of course, that was not meant to be. I wish I had've listened to myself but instead I "tried' selfishly for 2 more days, to bring him back to his original 'Puddin Self' - Saturday, when we said our goodbyes, I apologised for prolonging his pain and hoped that he would forgive me. When I made the decision for the catheter/medical care to bring back my Puddin, I thought it was going to just that .... bring back my Puddin' - I never even contemplated that I would lose him and prolong his pain even more. There is just no easy way .... it seems like when the outcome is like this, nothing you do or did is or was right! My house seems so empty without him today, it was the first Monday without him - the kids have gone back to school and hubby to work - the house just doesn't 'seem right'. Everytime I go into the kitchen, I am expecting him to 'race me to the foodbowl' or for him to 'see how many times he can trip me up' or seeing him sprawled out on the ottoman like a bear rug, laying on his back with his front paws and back feet spread eagle

We were surely blessed by having such beautiful babies Kathleen, and I am thanking God for allowing me to have the short time that I did with Puddin. It is bittersweet but I know we will meet again one day ..... Rainbows Bridge.

The bond that is shared between you and Shiloh is something that will never be broken, it is one of the most special feelings - treasure it and keep it close to your heart ~ she will be there by your side for eternity.

Take care of yourself ~ Hugs

Jayne,
Puddins Mum



Dear Jayne,

Puddin sounds like such a special kitty. I'm so sorry for your loss.

I know how quickly things can go from bad to worse with a blocked urethra. I used to have a kitty who had the same problem. She was female, and females don't "plug up" as quickly as males. I've heard that males can die in a matter of hours with this disease. Please don't blame yourself for not catching Puddin's problem in time...had you known he was sick, you would've taken him to the vet immediately. You can't blame yourself for something you weren't aware of. In dealing with the various guilts that I've had about Shiloh's passing, I've learned that one of the first positive steps we can take in our grief is to forgive ourselves and be gentle with ourselves.

You're in my thoughts.
Kathleen

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Shiloh, my little puppy love, you're gone from my arms, but forever in my heart. I miss you sweetie.

Shiloh
1999 - 2004