What Is Rainbow Bridge?, Is it good enough for you?? Options

[Punky's Mommy]

I'm sure it came from some poetry somewhere. I've never heard of it before coming here. I'd love to read the origins of this place.

But my purpose in posting is more serious. I wonder if you really believe in a Rainbow Bridge? Faith is something we adopt in order to deal with the incomprehensible. It helps people to cope. But what if relying on faith leaves you feeling shallow and deluded? I hope Punky is not at the base of a Bridge with all other animals in all time who have passed on. I do HOPE that he is up there, if it is even up, and his domain is more than the base of a Bridge, and he is content and entertained and active, knowing I will join him soon. But there is no proof of this. I am destroyed thinking there might be nothing after death. Punky is gone. He is no more. Just POOF. Just as he did not exist before his birth.

I ask, is euphemism good enough for you? Don't you feel panicked that this real world might be all there is? If you say "The Bible says it is so" then you again are relying on Faith and I go back to my original question. I've never desired faith more so than I do now, but it leaves me completely unsatisfied.

It's a level of suffering that no one talks about on this board, but I suspect many of you have wanted to.

[Punky's Mommy]

I really wanted to share a thought with all of you, but didn't want to start a new thread, so I'm putting it here although it is only partly related to this topic. Oh this is going to be such a *lovely* topic for a beautiful Sunday. (sarcasm)

Last night something very significant dawned on me. How to begin to explain this....(I think I've hit the backspace key 50 times already..hehe). Last night it occurred to me that I no longer fear my own death. I may fear the physical pain that might be involved, and of course, I fear what and if the afterlife is. But, I now know that if I ever find myself in a situation where my own death is inevitable, I will have a handle on that fear. Because I already experienced it. In my healing over Punky's last moments, I needed to recover from the horror. But what I had not given enough time to is the palpable fear that I felt in the moments leading up to it. I talked about it in my original posting about the experience. I described it as if I was about to be executed. And I know now even more so that that is exactly what happened. In that kind of fear, you are staring your own inevitable death in the face. Your heart races, you are breathing fast, you become hot and cold at the same time, and your mind is dizzy. You can't hear that well, because things are just closing in. You get a real funny taste in your mouth..an alkaline bitterness, like a nine-volt battery. You can't believe what is going to happen. You want to run but you can't. It is in itself almost an out-of-body experience, like you are watching it from outside yourself. This is what I felt in the moments before the vet arrived and then when she sat on the bed and loaded her syringe. I've heard it said over and over on this board that we take on our pet's suffering so they they don't have to. Well I think the first part is true. We take on their suffering. But for me the second part is false. I think Punky died twice that evening. Once was him - because he did suffer - and again was me - because I felt the same fear for him as if I were the one being killed. I only hope that I felt more fear than he did.

So, if I ever face my own death at the hands of someone else - through murder, execution, whatever - and all those physical sensations come up, I will focus my energy on my memory of Punky, and how it felt to go through this with him. And I think I will find strength. I need to say that no one needs to worry about my safety....I'm not hinting at anything whatsoever. It was just simply a very existential revelation that I had last night. I think I'm better for it. Thanks for letting me share.