Not For Me, But For My Hannah, It Hurts When Hardly Anyone Replies Options

[BabyHannahsMom]

I posted a tribute to my beautiful little girl Hannah who has been gone nine months and one day now. I got two private messages from two of my friends here and a response from Ann. Not many people have even looked at Hannah's tribute.

I know I haven't been replying a lot lately to many of your posts; however, I have in the past. I have been a member here now since April and have been a very active member and have really tried to help. I come here as often as I can because I really do care and really want to help, but as you all know, sometimes it becomes overwhelming and we have to take a break. So, I have done that from time to time, to keep my sanity, to try to break out of the deep depression I experienced for so long.

I don't know if that is why so few of you have read my tribute to Hannah or not. It really hurts me that only 20 something people have even looked at my post. If not for me, but for my girl and to acknowledge that she was a very important little girl, that her life to ya'll too, and that her story is worth at least a short response. And my story too, and my feelings. I still have no one really who I can talk to about Hannah, and I just wish I did. When that fact isn't even acknowledged here, it hurts. It hurts a lot to know that only some of you even looked to see what I had posted.

It feels like nobody cares about me or Hannah. I basically stopped "crying" aloud to anyone quite some time ago because it seems nobody listens or wants to listen. It makes me feel like I haven't been much help and that nobody is interested in what I have to say. Even several of you that I considered to be good friends, not one word have I heard from you since Christmas. It just makes me so sad. I'd rather not say anything anymore at all than to be ignored. I guess I have offended some of you in some way. If I have, I apologize.

I loved my little girl Hannah, and I miss her so very much. Even though it has been nine months now, the pain is still very much with me, the need to talk about her and to have someone listen is very important to me. The world is not a very nice place without her and now to be ignored on this board as if we don't even matter, is more than I can take. It just hurts too much. I am sorry.

[Punky's Mommy]

There are members here who thrive on the attention. I feel it has diminished and lessened the purpose of this forum.

Steve,

I understand what you are saying. I know I've been a big attention hog, bordering on drama queen. I feel bad for it too especially when I haven't given a lot of help to other members. I feel like I've generally gotten good responses to my posts, in both quantity and quality, yet even so, it never feels like enough. I'm just looking for something to fill the void in my life right now, and I look to here for that. Sometimes I just read and don't post for several days, and then some days I post a lot, like yesterday and today. The thing that I try not to do is to withdraw. Isolation turns into bitterness all too easy.

I really hope you don't leave the board.

-Punky's Mommy