Not For Me, But For My Hannah, It Hurts When Hardly Anyone Replies Options

[BabyHannahsMom]

I posted a tribute to my beautiful little girl Hannah who has been gone nine months and one day now. I got two private messages from two of my friends here and a response from Ann. Not many people have even looked at Hannah's tribute.

I know I haven't been replying a lot lately to many of your posts; however, I have in the past. I have been a member here now since April and have been a very active member and have really tried to help. I come here as often as I can because I really do care and really want to help, but as you all know, sometimes it becomes overwhelming and we have to take a break. So, I have done that from time to time, to keep my sanity, to try to break out of the deep depression I experienced for so long.

I don't know if that is why so few of you have read my tribute to Hannah or not. It really hurts me that only 20 something people have even looked at my post. If not for me, but for my girl and to acknowledge that she was a very important little girl, that her life to ya'll too, and that her story is worth at least a short response. And my story too, and my feelings. I still have no one really who I can talk to about Hannah, and I just wish I did. When that fact isn't even acknowledged here, it hurts. It hurts a lot to know that only some of you even looked to see what I had posted.

It feels like nobody cares about me or Hannah. I basically stopped "crying" aloud to anyone quite some time ago because it seems nobody listens or wants to listen. It makes me feel like I haven't been much help and that nobody is interested in what I have to say. Even several of you that I considered to be good friends, not one word have I heard from you since Christmas. It just makes me so sad. I'd rather not say anything anymore at all than to be ignored. I guess I have offended some of you in some way. If I have, I apologize.

I loved my little girl Hannah, and I miss her so very much. Even though it has been nine months now, the pain is still very much with me, the need to talk about her and to have someone listen is very important to me. The world is not a very nice place without her and now to be ignored on this board as if we don't even matter, is more than I can take. It just hurts too much. I am sorry.

[Miss Mew]

Dear Marcia,
You know the picture of Hannah always makes me smile when I see it- can't explain it- there is something so special about her eyes- a mixture of mischief and wisdom. I am one of those who has not been around here as much lately. Admitted to Denise a little while ago that I needed a break but it does not mean that I have forgotten my friends at LS. You may have read that my GSD dog Mik, has been battling Degenerative Myelopathy. I have found an online support group for dogs, mostly Shepherds, battling this disease. Much of my energy has been devoted to helping Mik fight this formidable enemy and the DM support group has been a God -Send much like the support group here at LS.
We cannot afford to appear sad because a positive attitude in the face of DM is almost as important as the different meds that we employ to try and slow down the progress of the disease, as there is no cure, but our dogs feed off our emotions.
Marcia, please do not think that you and Hannah don't matter or that you are not in our thoughts. I have not forgotten your replies to me when Miss Mew passed, and although I haven't posted lately does not mean that you and Hannah have been forgotten. In the past, I read many posts and wanted to reply but I became tongue-tied ( my husband would never believe that) or hesitant to say the wrong thing, or afraid of becoming repetitious. The amount of replies to a post are not indicative of what people here at LS feel. Would it not be something if we could hold an LS meeting in person, in the flesh, versus this written word contact? Just imagine how much more comforting all those hugs would be... But since we are constrained by this medium Marcia, you will just have to close your eyes and let everyone's loving thoughts wash over you and your beloved Hannah.
Take care,
Nicole