So Small, So Sweet, So Soon Options

[jaspersmom]

I can't believe that it has been only 11 days since I said goodbye to my beloved cat Jasper, it feels like so much longer, the days and nights go by so slowly without him here. I feel as though I am just going through the motions, putting one foot in front of the other, and it really does seem sometimes as though all of the color has gone out of my world. Yesterday it snowed, and I remember how he used to love to sit on the windowsill and watch the flakes fall, many times he would reach out his little paw and rest it on my arm, just to be connected to me, oh how I miss that. I still can't believe that he is not here, taken from me at such a young age. I just keep thinking about how young and healthy he was, how there was no time to prepare, how there was no time to say goodbye. It is just so hard to wrap my mind around the fact that he is no longer here with me in this physical realm, and the suddeness of it all is still so hard to deal with it. I have read about the stages of grief and I seem to go from one to the other in such random order, not sure which one I am in now, but it doesn't really matter, all I know is that it hurts, but I have learned from moon_beam's insightful words that our grief is very individual and can never be clinically categorized, it is such a personal journey, and there are no limits of time or depth of feeling to this journey. There have been times lately when I have thought of my sweet Jasper, and intermixed with the sadness and tears is a bit of a smile, so maybe the healing of my heart is beginning, I sure hope so. I know he would not want to see me so sad and I do want to one day be able to embrace the joy and love he gave me and still gives me, but I know this is going to take some time. I so miss awakening to those sweet little meows in the morning and that dear little paw on my shoulder, I don't like this new normal, it will never be normal without him.

[moon_beam]

Hi, jaspersmom, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing. Please let me reassure you that it is perfectly natural to feel "cheated" from all the years that "should have been" with the physical loss of your beloved Jasper at such a young and tender age. Comforting your precious Jingles will also bring comfort to you - - as you will be comforting one another. My precious Noah was not a "lap cat" with me when he had his housemates for company. But now he enjoys snuggling with me and curling up on my lap, and I am so honored to share these moments with him.

Jaspersmom, although clinical professionals recognize that the grief journey for the loss of a beloved companion is the same as the grief journey for a human family member or friend, sadly sometimes those who are closest to us emotionally and geographically do not. This is one of the many reasons why this wonderful forum is here where we can come to share what is in our hearts with those who truly DO understand what we are going through as we navigate our grief adjustment journeys. Rest assured there are no time limits here - - no "expiration dates" as to how often we need or want to share what is in our hearts.

I hope today is treating you and your precious Jingles kindly, jaspersmom, and that you will have a peaceful evening blessed with your beloved Jasper's sweet Living Spirit to comfort you. Please know you and your precious Jingles are in my thoughts and prayers, and please let us know how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam