More Than 3 Months Since I Lost My Precious Emma Options

[EmmasMom]

My precious, special dog, Emma, slipped quietly away from me on her own in July. She had been unwell the whole time she was with me -- she was a former puppy mill breeder with multiple medical problems. But we managed every day as it came and had seven years of love and joy together.

Emma was special -- very quiet and slow-moving, never played and rarely wagged her tail. But when she did wag, the world lit up with joy. Everyone who met her fell instantly in love and wanted to take care of her.

I can't stop thinking about how she died in my arms so quietly. It was only luck that I was with her at the time. She just gave up at last. I am so devastated, I don't know what to do. I still cry every day and kiss her bed and pretend to pet her soft fur. I feel like I'm crazy, but I want her to be with me so much that I pretend she is. And then I cry even harder. I can't bear to put her things away and her little dishes and a bone she left are still there. Will I ever accept her loss? I really expected to feel some relief from having to deal with all her medications and vet visits, and all the pressure of having to get home from anywhere quickly. But I don't feel any relief, just a terrible emptiness.

All the joy has gone out of my life because Emma was my joy.