How Will I Cope Options

[atrix]

Hi,i dont know what to do..my beloved great dane is 12 years old.last friday, he collapsed and was not able to get up again.
we called the vet, he told us that Astrix body was giving up and that he didnt want to put him to sleep as he didnt suffer yet, he gave him 2 injections( one for his heart and one for the pain )..
Something amazing happened after that, Astrix got up and took my harm in his mouth like he always do when he wants to play, he even ate a little and drank as well..we stayed up all night, i stroked him all night, then saturday morning, he collapsed again, he managed to get up again during the evening and then went down again.
He got up again sunday morning and collapsed shortly afterward, i called the vet, he came and said that Astrix was not suffering but he never got up after that and he got so thinn,i hate seing him like that, he seems to be in a coma now but peacefull, the vet will be here in one hour to put him to sleep forever.
I am dreading it, i am so scared, i havent slept in 3 days,i havent eat either, i dont want to loose my best friend, i feel so alone,i can not cope, i want to die, nobody seem to understand, they say tht i am exagerating.what will i do without him?
I dont know wether to stay with him when they put him to sleep, even though he is in a coma, he still give me the paw and he turned his head towards me, i wont be able to cope, he means everything to me, i cant stop cring, it hurts so much.what will i do?

[litebrez]

My heart is sad as I can feel your pain and love, beautiful...endless love for Astrix.
I experienced the same with my sweet, adorable Coco. Coco like your Astrix just didn't
want to leave this world and me. She was 19 years old and fought hard for her life....however,
her time was over.....leaving me 19 years of pure, total, precious love to cherish always.
And so my dear, this is the most difficult time for you and Astrix and the time for you to be as
strong as you can be, because Astrix needs you to be with him as he departs to what we call the
"Rainbow Bridge."
Please know that you are not alone now or anytime in the future, because everyone here is and will
support you.
I'm sending you big hugs and love to you and your precious Astrix.
Litebrez

[atrix]

My heart is sad as I can feel your pain and love, beautiful...endless love for Astrix.
I experienced the same with my sweet, adorable Coco. Coco like your Astrix just didn't
want to leave this world and me. She was 19 years old and fought hard for her life....however,
her time was over.....leaving me 19 years of pure, total, precious love to cherish always.
And so my dear, this is the most difficult time for you and Astrix and the time for you to be as
strong as you can be, because Astrix needs you to be with him as he departs to what we call the
"Rainbow Bridge."
Please know that you are not alone now or anytime in the future, because everyone here is and will
support you.
I'm sending you big hugs and love to you and your precious Astrix.
Litebrez

Tank you so much for you reply, it is of great confort
Astrix left me yesterday ( by the way my name is Natacha).
It was the hardest thing i ever had to do, he managed to lift his head to look at me one last time, oh it was heartbreaking.
When the vet injected him, he put his paw on me as if to say" its ok, you are doing the right thing mummy".
I am happy he is at rest now, it was the most difficult 4 days of my life.
I am going to have to find a way to cope without him now.
I dont feel guilty anymore now that he is not in pain but i am so angry at everyone.
We will be burying him later on today and i feel bad that he is alone in a room now but i dont feel strong enough to go and say one last goodbye as his spirit has left his body.He fell asleep peacefully, it was quick.
I hope i did the right thing, i hope he knows how much i love him.
Goodbye my angel, please take good care of him wherever he is, he likes to be rubbed over the eye in a circle motion to fall asleep,he likes to have a blanket on him tokeep him warm whe