Tucker Deserves The Best In Life And In Heaven Options

[WAdoglover]

I have started writing this several times, each with a heartfelt justification of why I love Tucker. I am going to put that aside for the moment. I, like everyone else on this site, joined out of a deep love, perhaps beyond many pet owners (just the term pet owner makes me shudder as if they are just property). I feel such a lonely devestation as if no one else could possibly understand what I am going through. I know that is not the case, but few people show in public or verbalize how devastated they are over their animals.

Tucker is still with me, but on borrowed time. This borrowed time even has extended beyond what has been fair to my fur child. He is suffering from larangeal paralysis and degenerative nerve damage. Surgery is out of the question. Some days I wish that God would make the umbearable decision for me and take him to the rainbow bridge since I am having a difficult time making the right decision. Truth is, my children are in the middle of finals and my oldest who is a Junior and on the verge of a 4.0. Really??? Am I really making a decision for him to hang on so that my kid can get a 4.0? Or am I just using this as an excuse to have more time with him? Am I avoiding the issue because I do not want my children to feel the pain I am currently experiencing? I spend my days laying down with him keeping him calm. I know we cannot keep on this path, and I know Tucker deserves better.

Perhaps the real issue for some of us who experience this type of grief is the depression that goes with it. Is it really reasonable to think that I can make a decision when experiencing the depression that goes with it? I am not ashamed of the deep love I have for my dog but at the moment it feels like a curse.

[moon_beam]

Hi, WA, please permit me to add my sincerest condolences on the Anticipatory Grief journey you and your precious Tucker are now experiencing in your earthly journey. I can certainly relate to your dilemma as my beloved Oslo also suffered with Laryngeal Paralysis and Degenerative Neuropathy, among other medical challenges. The hardest part of our earthly journey is watching our companion's health decline from their vibrant youthfulness, and being faced with the responsibility of releasing them from their failing, frail, painful physical body when their quality of life no longer exists.

As Amana and Gretta's Mom have offered you some very wonderful comforting encouragement, please let me try to add to their support. Our companion's physical body is identical to ours - - it is not designed for immortality on this side of eternity. We live in a physical oriented world governed by the 5 senses of taste, touch, smell, hearing, and sight. While our companions are physically with us they literally imprint themselves on us every time they touch us and lick us. This is why they can identify us from all the other millions of people that inhabit this planet. When they precede us to the angels, this physical bond no longer exits, and this is one of the many reasons why both the Anticipatory Grief journey and the post-loss grief journey are so very painful - - both emotionally and physically. During the Anticipatory Grief we still have our precious companions physically with us, yet we are still faced with the reality that our time together with them is now very limited. Our bodies begin the transition of physical separation as our companion's time draws closer to leaving their physical bodies. When they are no longer physically with us, our bodies literally go through a physical withdrawal, and it is very painful - - both emotionally and physically.

While clinical professionals now recognize that both the anticipatory and post-loss grief journeys are identical to the physical loss of a human family member or friend, our society in general, and sadly sometimes the people who are closest to us, do not. "Animals" are considered expendable, and to openly grieve the physical loss of a beloved companion is seldom acceptable. Having to cope with this non-accpetance of those who are closest to us physically and sometimes emotionally only adds to our deep sorrow. This is one of the many reasons why this wonderful forum was developed, WA. This forum is a safe place where you can come to share what is in your heart and on your mind with people who truly do understand what you are going through - - without fear of judgment or rejection. We are here for you and your precious Tucker for as long and as often as you need us.

The only advice I can offer you and your precious Tucker is to take one day at a time. Embrace every moment you have together for it is precious time for both you and your precious Tucker. Making "the decision" is not an easy one, and it isin't meant to be easy. It is very similar to making life support decisions for a human family member or friend. If you have questions about his medical condition talk to his veterinary provider, who I hope will compassionately offer you support and encouragement through this very difficult time. And once again please know that each of us are here for you.

Thank you so much for sharing your precious Tucker with us, WA. Perhaps sometime you would like to share a picture(s) of him with us - - but only when / if you want to. I hope today is treating you and your precious Tucker kindly. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, WA, and please let us know how you and your precious Tucker are doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam