My Baby Is Gone Options

[merlin96]

My Sweetie is gone. I had to have her put to sleep yesterday morning after the pain from spinal osteosarcoma got too bad. She was diagnosed on 12/28 and we struggleld for 2 weeks after that trying to manage the pain. More like keep ahead of the pain. She ended up on 4 different kinds of medications just to keep her pain under control and in the end it failed miserably. There was no choice but to let her go. She was an awsomely beautiful 8 1/2 year old Akita Shepherd mix whose name reflected her gentle soul and spirit. I got her from the shelter less than 3 years ago and that was the name she came with. It suited her. She was a good girl in every way. She loved trying to chase squirrels, playing with all her stuffed animals, giving kisses, getting belly rubs, going for adventure walks and riding in the car. My life is empty without her. I don't know how I will go on. I am lost. My heart is broken.

[merlin96]

Today is one week that Sweetie has gone. Last week at this time she was still here but in a lot of pain, unable to get up and go out and in a few more hours, I took her to the vet and released her. This week went fast and at the same time, crawled at a snail's pace.

I feel so angry. Last night into this morning, we had our first snow fall. Not a very heavy one - maybe an inch or a little more. Standing outside in my yard very early this morning, watching the snow fall, all I could think about was how much Sweetie would love to be out there, romping around in the snow. She loved snow. She loved everything. She loved life. Why was it taken from her? I just don't understand. She was such a good girl. She never did anything wrong in her whole life. I just want to scream, to hit something. She had so many more years left to live and she should have gotten to live them. I feel so very angry and I don't even know who to feel angry at. I just miss her so much.