I Don't Know Where To Start, I had to let my baby go on 09/29/11 Options

[nippermom]

I have lost pets before but none have ever been like this. I have cried every day since I let my Nipper go. I was blessed to have her with me for 15 1/2 years. We went through so much together. She was always there by my side. Nipper was the first dog that I raised on my own from 7 weeks of age until the end. She was my total responsibility. I cannot get used to the fact that she won't be coming back. She will never meet me at the door again. I will never hear her jump off of the bed in the morning.

I have already been dealing with depression. Now I have this on top of it. My therapist has been very supportive but there is still so much time that I spend alone. Nipper went very peacefully. When I was holding her and waiting for the vet, she was very calm and relaxed. It was as if she was letting me know that she was ready to go.I cannot put into words how much I miss my baby girl. It feels like the pain will never go away.

I love you Nipper-02/01/96-09/29/11

[Gretta's Mom]

Hello Nippermom

I am truly sorry about the passing of precious Nipper from this world. I lost my Gretta (the kindest chocolate lab who ever lived) in April of this year, so I, along with everybody else here can understand a little of what you're going through. As Moonbeam often says, every person's grief journey is different. One things we all do share, though, is the intense loss of our beloved furbabies. And they are truly our babies, especially for those of us who don't have human children. Your heart must be especially shattered because of the many years you were privileged to have Nipper with you. Sometimes we are doubly blessed with a visit from a truly special animal - and I can tell from your writing that you are one of us.

These are the spirit-animals. We and they are made of the same "stuff." In fact, I believe we actually share parts of each other's souls - from the beginning of time until the end of eternity. Forever, you have held a ppiece of Nipper's soul and Nipper has held a part of yours. These spirit-animals came from the Perfect World (some people call it heaven) and have now returned to their original home. But they have done something truly amazing in between: they have searched the universe over to find their soul-mate. They found us - just us - their one and only - among all the billiions of people in the universe. Then they put themselves in our paths so we will find them. And when we DO, the instant rush of love tells both of us that "we've found each other."

These spirit-animals guide us, teach us life lessons, and most important of all, love us and are loved by us. This love is unique - because it's really not two beings loving each other, it's one being enveloping itself in LOVE! Whoever made the universe decided to make our animals' life spans shorter than our own. And this means we have to reach deep inside, like you did, and find the ultimate strength - the strength to let them go, to send them on ahead of us back to that perfect World, where we will one day be reunited, NEVER again to be parted. Experiencing this is, to put it bluntly, hades on earth. It's the worst pain of all time. And time will dull, but, I believe never take away the ache in our hearts that comes from missing a piece of our souls.

Animals are far more 'seeing" than people - thank goodness. They know our hearts. Nipper is surrounded by the most precious cocoon of all - a mother's true love. Nipper is right beside you - as Gretta is beside me - still guiding, teaching and loving you exactly the same as always. They can see us but we cannot see them - or hear them, or touch their soft fur. And that's what breaks our hearts.

But remember three things, Nipper's mom. Nipper is living the life you always wanted her to have - healthy, happy, active, having fun, among all God's creatures. And one day you WILL be reunited. And, finally, you've come to the right place. This site is a family - united in sorrow, yes, but also in the knowledge that our lives have been transformed by our soul-animals. We're always here 24/7. We get it. We understand. We're a band of brothers and sisters in the most special way. Welcome to the family. If only you didn't have to hurt so much to get in.

Take as much time as you have to in the "shick and awe" and 'robot walk" times. Others may expect more of you, but your LS family is just willing to sit and love and support you.

Have the day God meant for you, Nipper's mom. And I'll ask Gretta to find Nipper (if she hasn't already) and they can lie down and trade "great mom" stories!

Your new friend,

Gretta's mom