Lack Of Support From Friends Options

[lucky01]

Hello-

I recently had to put down my dog, Lucky, on Saturday night. It was a horrible decision to have to make. Besides the loss that I feel, what really surprised me was how little some of my friends seem to care. So I guess I'm venting a bit here.

I use Facebook quite a bit and have always prided myself on being as supportive as possible when my friends experience loss or a hardship. I also learned that one should never try to marginalize or minimize any loss no matter how I may feel about it. After all, it's not for me to decide. What's important is that you respect what the person who experienced the loss is feeling and do your best to comfort them and be of help.

Some of my friends did really step up, others didn't. Perhaps I just angry and am over-&%^yzing the whole thing. Perhaps people just don't know what to do or how to respond. All I know is that I handle things much differently than many of my friends.

...and if I hear the old, "it's just a dog" thing, they better step back about 5 feet from me

BTW, thanks to all forum members and the creator of this website for creating this special place.

[Cheryl83]

Dear Lucky01,

I'm so sorry for the loss of your precious dog. I'm also sorry that you feel you're not getting the support that you need. I think that's something we can all relate to on here. See, the people on this forum are true animal lovers. We're the kind of people that see our pets as true family members, worthy of the same amount of care and love and respect as humans. The reason we feel like this, is because we've all experienced a special bond and connection with a pet. We've experienced love in the purest form with no boundaries or judgements. That's why the loss hits us so deeply. Unfortunately, not everyone experiences this, or feels this way. Which is why you might be met with the dreaded, "It's just a..." Or, "Well, why don't you just get another one?" These people just do not understand. And although it's natural for us to feel anger towards them for not understanding, I guess it's really not their fault. We should actually feel sorry for them, that they've never experienced the true joy of bonding with an animal.

But please know that now you've found this forum, you're not alone. We all understand, and our hearts break for your loss. We're here to listen whenever you need us. Perhaps you would like to tell us more about Lucky, and maybe even share of photograph if you're able?

Take things one day at a time, and allow yourself to grieve.

You'll be in my thoughts -- Cheryl x

[lucky01]

Dear Lucky01,

I'm so sorry for the loss of your precious dog. I'm also sorry that you feel you're not getting the support that you need. I think that's something we can all relate to on here. See, the people on this forum are true animal lovers. We're the kind of people that see our pets as true family members, worthy of the same amount of care and love and respect as humans. The reason we feel like this, is because we've all experienced a special bond and connection with a pet. We've experienced love in the purest form with no boundaries or judgements. That's why the loss hits us so deeply. Unfortunately, not everyone experiences this, or feels this way. Which is why you might be met with the dreaded, "It's just a..." Or, "Well, why don't you just get another one?" These people just do not understand. And although it's natural for us to feel anger towards them for not understanding, I guess it's really not their fault. We should actually feel sorry for them, that they've never experienced the true joy of bonding with an animal.

But please know that now you've found this forum, you're not alone. We all understand, and our hearts break for your loss. We're here to listen whenever you need us. Perhaps you would like to tell us more about Lucky, and maybe even share of photograph if you're able?

Take things one day at a time, and allow yourself to grieve.

You'll be in my thoughts -- Cheryl x

I hope everyone enjoys the photo of Lucky. If I may, I just wanted to say a couple of things about him as Cheryl suggested. I rescued Lucky on St. Patty's Day in 2002. We found him in a shelter in a cage full of barking dogs. I knew he was the dog for me as he was just ignoring them and sitting quietly. His previous owners just left him and never came to pick him up. I can't even imagine that. Lucky was house trained and never destroyed anything.

Lucky loved all dogs and people. He looked forward to meeting both humans and dogs alike. He was quite mellow but at the same time, enjoyed hiking and going to new places. He was also stubborn. If he wanted to walk on a certain side of the street, then that's what we did.

One of Lucky's more interesting qualities was that he could sense if I was upset or sad...even the slightest hint of sadness and he would do whatever he could to make me feel better. He was truly selfless.

Lucky was also a picky eater. He had very high standards and always ate like a gentleman. If you gave him a snack or a treat, he would gently take it from you as to say, "thank you very much" (in my fanciest accent). Funny.